Part 9

“Don’t mind him; he’s probably tired from the flight.” Dan stepped back and motioned for Tom to come into the kitchen. He turned his head. “Is it okay if I get us something to drink, Laurie?”

Laurie, Tom’s mom, nodded her head and Dan walked over to the fridge. While he stepped away, his mom stood up and walked over, giving Tom a quick hug. “I’m glad you got back okay.” Her voice was warm, but distracted. Tom felt like hitting something, even if it was Dan. Dan always made her like this and Tom could only sit back and watch in frustration.

Dan sat down at the kitchen table, pitcher in one hand and a group of cups in the other. “Come sit down, you two.” His mom turned and went back to her chair and Tom, after glaring at Dan for a moment more, walked over and took a seat.

Dan was older than he had been last time Tom had seen him. He was still a big man, built to resemble a tank rather than a human being, but he was getting bigger around the middle. His hair was also graying, making him seem more like those old men that sat around in the park, endlessly playing chess.

Dan poured him a cup of some type of punch and pushed it across the table to Tom. “So, where you been, son?”

“Didn’t Mom tell you?”

“Nah, she just told me that you were off on some trip with a friend.” Dan poured his mom a cup and pushed it to her as well. “So, how was it, son?” His voice was a bit strained, as though he was trying to be relaxed but it wasn’t quite working. Tom knew the feeling.

“Can you stop calling me that?” Tom’s voice was tight and he grabbed the cup in front of him to try to hide how much he wanted to hit the man.

Dan blinked and stared at him for a moment. “What? Stop calling you son? Now, why would I…?”

“I think you gave up any right to calling me son when you walked out.” Tom clutched his cup tighter.

His mom abruptly stood up, blathering some random things to Dan about Tom’s trip. Figures, she was always trying to defend him, even though he had walked out on her as well. It didn’t really surprise Tom, since he’d always figured that she was still in love with him. Tom knew though, he knew that this man was dirt.

“Quiet, Mom.” Tom stood up as well. “He doesn’t deserve to know how my trip was. He doesn’t deserve to know anything about me.” He glared at her, trying to will her into recognize this man for what he really was. “He doesn’t deserve to come into your home.”

Dan sat in silence before he waved her back into her chair. She sat down and folded her hands, staring down at her lap with a very unhappy look on her face. After a moment, Dan let out his breath in a rush and lowered his head into one of his hands. “Look, I’m sorry, Tom.” He looked up, his face drawn and gray, not at all like his normal smiling self. “I know I don’t deserve anything, but I want to come back. I know what I did was wrong and that I deserve your hate, but I’m asking for a second chance.”

Laurie looked up at Tom, slowly nodding her head. Of course she wanted him back; she had never let him go. Not like him, Tom had let him go ever since he had left them to go off and make his fortune without his baggage. She smiled up at Tom. “I know you’re still angry about everything, but Dan and I have been talking for the past week about… well, everything, and I think we should let him come back….”

Tom slammed his fist on the table. “Let him back if you want, I’m going to start looking for an apartment tomorrow.” He turned and gathered up his things, walking towards the back of the apartment. “Good night, Mom.”

Behind him, he could hear Dan let out his breath and say, in a low voice, “… he just needs some time…”

Tom opened his room’s door, put his bags on the floor and closed the door behind him. He then sank down on the floor and quietly began sobbing. Within, emotions raged about. He could barely understand what he was feeling, needless to say why.

At the top was anger, pure and sweet. He was angry with the man that had walked out on him and his mom. He hadn’t been home when Dan had walked out, but he could remember coming home from school and finding Mom sobbing. That’s when his world had shattered and now this same man had the nerve to just come back after years, saying ‘oh, I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. Now, you have to forgive me, because I said I was sorry. Let me back in so I can hurt you both all over again’.

Under the anger was sadness. After Dan had walked out, Mom had been a wreck for months. It had torn Tom up inside to see her pain and know that he couldn’t do anything to make it better. It had hurt even worse to feel his own pain and know that it wasn’t going to go away. It had just subsided into a dull throb that had haunted him for years.

However, under both the anger and sadness was a strange joy that Tom hated. How could he be happy to see Dan again? This man had hurt them, had turned his back on his family and when he came back asking for forgiveness, Tom found himself feeling happy. How could he feel happy? It was just that little surge of joy that one gets as a kid when the door opens. You just run up, screaming in joy that daddy was home, right? It wasn’t anything more than that, right?

Tom began to softly thump his head against the door behind him. He couldn’t let that man back into his life, not after what Dan had done. If mom was foolish enough to want him back, let her; but Tom wasn’t going to jump up, screaming ‘Daddy’s home’.

Minutes passed and finally his tears subsided. He just sat on the floor, leaning up against the door and stared into the darkness. So much had happened in this past month, first the journal, then Jason getting stabbed, then fighting that man in the alley and now this. All he wanted was getting through college and living out his life in peace. Was it too much to expect a little bit of peace?

Fetch! He had forgotten about the journal. It was still safely tucked away in his bag and he’d been meaning to talk to his mom about it once he got home, but now Dan was back. Dan had left them because of money; if he found out about the journal, would it just make him leave again? Tom didn’t know and he wasn’t about to be the reason for Dan hurting his mom like that again. He couldn’t tell either of them about the journal.

Muffled footsteps came up to the door behind him and paused. Tom didn’t move; he just sat, holding his breath until the footsteps turned away and went back to the kitchen. Tom let out his breath and slid down, lying on the carpet in his room. He was too tired to get up and get in his bed, he just wanted to close his eyes and get away from this whole mess. As he drifted off, his mind slowly pointed out that those footsteps hadn’t been his mother’s soft steps. Those had been Dan’s.

Before he fell asleep, he heard himself mutter, “Daddy’s home.”