the way your

hips are like motion pictures

between

my fingertips

sends my head in chemical clouds

like a runner’s high

a body of ocean transcending

reality

cupped between

our teenage sexuality

i fell

through the looking glass;

young man and woman slow dancing

like a mock version of passionate

sex (standing up)

music tidal waves flood my ears

across

the dance floor

like a stream of consciousness

surrounding

my hidden erection like a crouching tiger

anticipation, procreation

must i

hold onto you

for only three minutes?

it seems like it will be the end

of me

when the music stops

love; or is this an infatuation—recoils

back into the womb of my thoughts

where you still touch me

only in my

imagination

where i die daily without

some kind of reinforcement to know

i’m more than transparent in

your faces full of each other;

he reaches down your rack like he’s

bobbing for apples

and

i’m just

the shadow of your day

again

-

my heart feels valentines when you

throw

your

womanhood

at me

precariously;

the kind where it beats

stealing photos from

your locker,

retrieving all time highs that

give me

mind

over

matter

sensation; at minimum wage,

fluffy feelings

that make my

sex

stretch like elastic

but

nice guy antiques finish last

in the gospel of

double-standards

so my sex ends up

shriveled

like an empty banana peel

as i come home

naked of thought

having chewed a large portion out of myself

feeling depressed

in the ninth circle of hell

but my friends who

don’t share my

bipolar mindset utter me words of

wisdom

yes, they utter Christian words like

‘the one person you need to meet is looking for you’

well someone needs to stop sleeping with Walt Disney

anyway

i guess someday after

i live up to be a

thirty

year

old

virgin

with my prejudice against

myself

and anger over my own

biology

i’ll compensate for my losses

and reach nirvana with

pornography and

transcendental meditation

-

i hope

both taste

better than

dr. pepper and

unorthodox weather