Hi, my name is Sarace.

I’m named after my mum’s former best friends, Sarah and Grace, who tragically died in a car accident two days after my conception. The story of my name has inspired two girls from my class, Marie and Emma, to set up a joint Facebook account under the name “Mamma”.

My name is a constant reminder of how perfect Sarah and Grace were, which is why mum wants me to be perfect too. Dad, on the other hand, wants me to be perfect just because if geniuses can do it, his daughter can. Get straight-A’s, be popular, be admitted by Oxford, Cambridge and Harvard at the same time and struggle to decide which ones to turn down… That’s the sort of life I’m supposed to lead. Despite the fact that straight-A students are never popular, and you’re not even allowed to apply to both Oxford and Cambridge.

What do I want to do instead, you ask? First of all, I thank you for the question, kind reader, because you’re the first one to have asked me for my opinions on my own life. To be honest, all I want to be when I leave school is a hairdresser. Did I hear a laugh? Of course, it’s probably a waste of private education and money – in fact, private schools like mine don’t even offer Hairdressing courses, so it’s pretty much a waste of my life. Instead, just look at my subjects at the moment… Russian, English Literature and Economics. Who am I kidding? Like, do you think I got much out of my English lessons?

No.

Thank you! What I’ve really learned during these years is that perfectionist parents SUCK. And I’ve got to run away.