A/N: Hello! This was orginally under young adults, but then I recalled how my old english teacher told me this story could be considered a thriller since it involved very dark themes and other things...

Lastly, the begining is supposed to be confusing.

so, here it is,

enjoy!!

Prologue:

Life should to be lived to the fullest.

Life is tough.

Life is precious.

Life is cruel.

Life is everything.

Life is unfair.

Life is beautiful.

Life has no meaning.

Life is a dream.

Life is no fun with out this or without that.

Life means the world to...

Life means nothing.

Life is sweet.

Life is wild.

Life has sacrifices

Life is full of surprises.

Life is scary.

Life is lovely.

Life is hard.

Life is fragile.

Life is full of choices.

That’s just a few of the many perspectives I had heard about life. My opinion? Life is just life. It’s all those things listed above into one. It’s doesn’t mean much to me though. It’s not something I really think about anymore. Life is just there. I have no ambitions. I have no dreams. I just…live. There’s no meaning, there’s no point, and I’m just there.

I guess my perspective on life changed when my parents died. I don’t really remember how I felt about it before hand. Haro said I just need a girlfriend. Then life would be awesome. The thing is, he bases that on all the movies he watches. How would he know? He’s never had a girlfriend. My father believed I wouldn’t get a girlfriend anytime soon. He said that real women want a real man. I don’t pay attention to him though. There are plenty of guys at my school who don’t live up to my father’s definition of a “real man” and have had plenty of girlfriends.

Life was normal, before I found her unconscious in the woods. I often wonder what would have happened to all of us, if I never found her. Where would they be? Where would I be? Probably not here, a place where I don’t know anybody except for the friends that had to share the same fate as I. Sometimes, I wish I never picked that fight. If I had been smart and more moral, I would have said no and she wouldn’t have to suffer daily for this.

Life is full of choices. I remember the good old days. I could choose whatever I wanted. Whether it was food or what I wanted to do for that day. Now, I have no choice. I have to be here, if I want people to live. If I separate myself from her, then I would go berserk and I would become another sadistic person who enjoyed killing as much as they did; then she would see the massacres, and she would be hurt. I don’t want that.

I love her. I never wanted to admit it because I knew she just wanted to remain friends, but it’s true, I love her. I would do anything for her, anything at all. I will never leave her. I’ll be there when she needs me. I want to do all I can to protect her. To me she is life. Without her where would I be? No, I’m not agreeing with Haro. I don’t believe having a girlfriend will change one’s perspective on things. It can, but it really depends on the person. My situation is different though. How different can it be? Very different. If I told someone, they wouldn’t believe me. How can they? It’s impossible. Even if I showed them what I can do, what I’m capable of, they still won’t believe me.

Thinking about it now, I can’t even believe it; but here I am; place I’ve never even heard of before, with fields of nothing but grass and flowers here and there. At least we’re no where near that other place. However, I still have that feeling that he’s going to come back. He’s going to break out of prison and force all back under his control. I can’t let that happen though. That’s why I am here. That’s why we’re all here.

She’s miserable. I can see it. I want to make her happy. She tries to hide her emotions but some leak out here and there. I hate seeing her like that. It tears me apart. I want to do something but I can’t. There’s nothing I can do. Sometimes I wonder if she would run away. She probably would but then she would know what would happen. She couldn’t allow something like that to happen. That’s why she’s here, with me. She has no choice.

When we first discovered what happened to us. I did my best to comfort her. She had goals. She had ambitions but now…they’re just dreams. There’s no way she could make them come true. Instead, she has to stay here with me. The others seem to be just fine. Well, they should be. He’s crazy about her and she finally accepted his love. She gave him a lot of trouble but he’s still with her. I don’t think she would have been able to give him up though. His devotion and love for her was just too strong.

She…loves me too…I know she does. I’m not asking for much. I don’t expect her to throw herself on me nor do I want her to feel like she has to do something she doesn’t want to do, like kiss me or something like that. I just want her to be happy. The things I can do for her are limited though. I guess I could take to places. I just can’t be near people with dark thoughts. It makes me struggle. Before I know it, I’m no longer concentrating on her; I’m formatting ways to kill that person or convincing myself that someone should suffer. I don’t know what made me like this, this bloodthirsty creature, hunting for ways to destroy a life, a life that has family, friends, and shelter. It could be jealousy, but it’s much more than that. It’s just who I am. That’s why I rely on her to control me. She does a good job too. When she smiles at me, I could feel my heart melt inside my chest. Her soft laugh always makes me smile, and I hardly ever smile. Her cool yet warm skin always lights up my world and I always get lost staring in her vanilla color eyes.

She loves me. She wants to be with me. True, she loved…loves someone else, but she doesn’t mind being with me. She needs to be with me. If she separates herself from me, she feels this…unexplainable loneliness inside of her. It’s like she drawn toward me. She could die without me. This…fate? No, these outcomes forced us to be this way. It seems like there no way to escape. There’s no way we could get rid of these…crystals. Well, there is one way…but it’s painful…there’s so much pain.

I wish there was something I could do to make her happy. She’s very good at hiding her emotions but I can see everything in her eyes. I see misery, I see pain and I see reluctance. She wants to be with me but I’m not the one. There’s someone else she desires more. There’s nothing I can do about it though. We don’t know where he is…and I don’t want to look for him. I can tell she wants to see him again though.

As I look in her eyes, her beautiful vanilla eyes, I see the truth she wants to hide. I see exactly what I don’t want to see.

This isn’t what she would choose. No dove wants to be stuck in a cage.