“Oh Comely”
(Part One)

“Do you know her?” Toby pointed across the street to a girl in a tattered pair of jeans and a dingy wife-beater.

“Not really.” George replied.

“What does that mean?”

“I don’t know her personally.” George clarified. “She went to high school here but we didn’t associate with the same people. I couldn’t tell you much about her.”

“Do you know her name?”

“Comely.”

“… What?” Toby wasn’t sure if he’d heard correctly.

“Her name’s ‘Comely’.” George reiterated. “Comely Sprague, if you wanna get formal.”

“… That’s kinda sick.”

“Yeah. The word ‘comely’ means ‘attractive’ but it’s kind of dated; nowadays most people just think if ‘cumming’ when they hear it.” George explained. “Her parents are kinda backward and ignorant anyway; I don’t figure they thought that through when they decided to name her ‘Comely’.”

“Anything else you can tell me about her?”

“Not really. Except that she’s really sleazy, so if you’re getting any ideas I’d quit that right now, if you value your own personal hygiene.”

Toby was silent.

“… I guess she is kind of good-looking, in a back-ally sort of way.” George added, trying to mend his friend’s broken spirit.

end