DO I L.O.V.E U?!

I woke up to my baby boy Jordan aka lil Jay Jay, and his twin sister Chrissie aka chrissie babey. “Mommy wake up wake up!!” they both said as they jumped up and down on my bed.

“Im awake, im awake!!” I said as I grabbed the both of them. They were both so skinny!! It was kind of scary!! They reminded me of their dad so much.

They looked Filipino more then black really. I was Filipino and black, and their dad was Mexican and Filipino, so they had that thick long curly hair like their dad, I got straight Filipino hair despite my black daddy I had light brown skin and caramel colored eyes. They had matching green eyes like their dads and dimples just like his.

“Mommy gramma is making breakfast!!” Chrissie my little girl said as she pulled my arm one way.

“Noooooooooo!! I wanted to tell her!! I hate you Chrissie!” my little boy Jordan said.

“Hey that’s not nice!!” I said as I pulled him off of his sister. Then my mother walked in and handed me a cup of coffee!!

“Well I see the kids woke you up!!” she said as she smiled and grabbed their hands.

“No it’s okay!” I said as I stood up and stretched. “I gotz this!” I said as I smiled and walked downstairs.

Okay so before I finish this my name is Jordin, Breana Camacho-Valle. Im 23 years old, im now a single parent of twins because my bitch ass husband Jontrell aka JT left us because he was supposedly scared of the responsibility. Okay well before I get carried away and give away the whole story im gonna finish…

“Momma….momma look!!” chrissie said as she showed me her picture.

“Wow baby” I said as I looked at her picture of a…well actually I didn’t really know what it was it looked like a demented horse slash flower…

“Do you even know what it is?” she asked as she placed her long thin fingers on her bony hip. She was just a little kid but she had attitude.

“Umm of course it’s an umm…. It’s a flow...” I started to say until she started shaking her head… “Hors…”

“No momma it’s daddy!!” she said as she stomped her tiny feet.

“Oh well that looks just like him!!” I said as I stared at the picture.

Then I heard the doorbell ring. “Honey can you go get that?” my mother called from the kitchen.

“Yea no problem mom!!” I said as I pulled my spaghetti straps up over my shoulders.

And when I opened the door who do you think I saw?

“Oh Fuck!” I said as I tried to close the door.

“Oooooo momma!!” Chrissie said as she covered her bright pink lips and her big green eyes opened wide.

“Daddy!!” she said as she ran over to him and hugged him.

“Oh hay chrissie babey!!” he said as he threw her up in the air and caught her again.

“I missed you!! Where did you go?” she started to ask tons of questions that her young mind had pondered for hours. Her pink flowery room was covered in pictures of her dad and me and the kids as a happy family. But I knew I wouldn’t go back to that again no matter how fine he was.

“Umm chrissie babey why don’t you go and see gramma?” I said slowly as I glared at my so called husband JT.

“Okay mommy!” chrissie said as she slipped out of her father’s grasp and ran to the kitchen. Then Jordan ran down the stairs.

“Hay is that ma lil man Jay Jay?” JT asked as he looked at Jordan, Jordan’s frown turned upside down immediately.

“Daddy!!” jay jay said as he ran over. But before he could reach us I pushed jay jay back inside and my husband back outside. Then I closed the door behind us and stood on the porch.

“Jontrell, Jordan, Acevez-Terell, why are you here?” I asked as I crossed my arms.

“Jordin, Breana, Camacho-Valle, what can’t a father come see his sexy wife, and adorable children?” he asked as he smiled that sexy smile of his and stepped back a little.

“First of all you is my ex!! And second…Boy, don’t play, why are you here? Did you loose your job?” I asked as I shook my head and pulled my tank top straps up over my shoulders.

“Actually…” he said as he stepped aside revealing his jet black Ferrari. “No, im doin just fine, you?” he asked as he smiled and the sunlight reflected off his humongous diamond stud.

“And you aren’t officially my ex because we never really divorced!” he said smartly.

“Well if you didn’t loose your job what happened?” I asked as I placed my hand on my hip.

“I already told you I came to see yall!!” he said getting a little bit annoyed.

“Oh so just all of a sudden you woke up this morning and decided to drive from San Diego to Vallejo to see the family that you practically forgot about for three years!!” I said as I felt tears in my eyes.

“Hey I was scared, I was young and stupid and I wasn’t ready for all that responsibility!” he said as he raised his voice.

I started to cry a little bit.

“Well you know what, I was scared too. I was scared when I found out I was pregnant, I was scared when I went to the doctor for a check up and discovered that I was having twins!! How do you think I felt when I was in labor and my ‘husband’ wasn’t even there? And do you know how hard it was to explain to my parents that you had left us after all the stupid things you’ve ever done and I’ve defended you for? Do you know how hard it is to raise two kids, working full time, a single parent?! No you don’t know because while I was doing all this work where were you? O yea you were out who knows where doin who knows what!! Do you know how much that hurts?” I asked as I really started to cry.

“Listen I know how you feel because I was hurt to! I was hurt because I was scared; after I left I realized I couldn’t live with out you and the twins! But I was scared to come back, I couldn’t face you or your family not after all I had done, so I left…” he said as he tried to hold me, but I shook his hands away. “Okay” he said as he backed off.

“Well you know what, I think you should just leave, don’t bother talking to the kids because they’ll just fuss because you’re leaving them…again.” I said as I wiped my eyes.

“Aye don’t do that to them…” he said as he touched my shoulder.

“Just go!!” I said as I opened the front door.

“Okay” he said as he backed up. “I’ll see ya’ll later” he said as he turned and jogged back to his car.

“Whuteva!” I said as I fixed my face and put on the best fake smile as I tried to avoid my mother and sneak up the stairs.

But right as I reached the first step I heard her…

“Honey who was that?” my mother asked as she walked into the front room and leaned against her grand piano.

“Umm no one of much importance” I said as I wiped my face properly and turned to face her.

“Sure…what happened your eyes are red!” she said as she smiled knowingly.

“Well since there’s no point trying to lie to you since you obviously already know what happened down to the very last detail so why even bother discussing it?” I asked as I looked down at my poke-a-dot flip flops and laughed a little to myself.

“Okay… well you’re right I do know, and you know how I know?” she asked as she leaned forward. I just rolled my eyes and sighed. “Go ahead and ask me!” she said as she flicked her hand towel.

“How momma?” I asked exasperatedly.

“I knew because im your mother and I know everything!! Ha!! And when you are ready you can come to me and talk about it, just make sure you’re ready today!!” she said as she turned and helped the kids make their Easter cookies and paint their Easter eggs.

“Sure…” I said as I let my tears run down my face.

A few minutes later I was out again. And as soon as sleep had come to me it left me. I was abruptly awoken to the cheers of my children.

“Whoa momma the Easta bunnie!!” chrissie and Jay Jay said at once.

“Hmm?” I asked as I looked up.

“Lookie!!” chrissie said as she took her finger out of her mouth and turned my head. YUCK!!

“Oh!” I said as I saw a commercial for Easter.

“Well you guys have to go get washed and changed because we have reservations for a buffet…I said as I pinched Chrissie’s temptingly chubby cheeks!

“Haha okay!” chrissie said as she ran and picked out her outfit. She brought out her tiny high top highlighter air forces. And an Easter baby phat dress. Because my kids wore designer clothes only!! Haha.

“Jay Jay, ma lil man what’s wrong?” I asked as I pulled him into my lap.

“Leave me alone!!” he said as he tried to escape from my grasp.

“Lil man what is your problem?” I asked as I pulled his chin to face me.

“I want my daddy!!” he said as he crossed his arms and stuck out his lip.

“Well your daddy is a bum!!” I said as I crossed my arms and imitated him.

“Momma why did daddy leave us?” chrissie asked as she walked over with her clothes and an outfit she had picked out for her brother.

“Baby come here…I don’t know why your daddy left us” I said as I kissed her forehead and hugged her tight.

“Is he ever coming back?” she asked as she put her fingers in her little mouth.

“I don’t know!” I said as I messed with her curls. “But whether daddy comes back or not you guys still have to take a bath!!” I said as I started tickling them.

“Aagh!! Stop momma stop!!” chrissie and Jordan said as they tried to block my fingers.

“Okay, okay enough playing you guys are gonna make us all late!!” ma momma said as she pulled the kids off the bed and took them to the bathroom so that they could take their bath.

“Thanks momma!” I said as I ran my fingers through my hair and breathed out.

“No problem but you need to get ready too!!” she said as she kicked the kids along playfully.

“Yea I know!!” I said as I stood up and stretched. Then I walked over to my suit case and picked out some black dereon skinny jeans with white dereon logos on the back pockets. And some high white heels and a white and black mid drift dereon shirt. See I was lucky I didn’t have stretch marks that looked nasty from kids. I just had lighter colored lines under my waist so I could wear shirts that complimented my belly button piercing.

After I picked out my clothes I turned on the shower and started brushing my teeth while it steamed up.

Before I continue I just wanted to clue you in, just in case you didn’t fully understand I don’t live in ma momma’s house and my parent’s are divorced. My father lives in Jamaica with his family and my mother lives out here where she’s closer to me. Okay well know that I’ve clued you in let’s get back to the story…

By the time I finished brushing my teeth the water was ready so I got in did my usual routine thingy… when I got out I was greeted by two clean and smiling children who were looking like absolute angels.

“Well don’t you two look nice!!” I said as I scratched my wet mane!!

“Tank you mommy!!” chrissie and Jordan said at the same time.

“Well you are very welcome!!” I said as I pinched Jordan’s nose.

“Ouchies momma!!” Jordan said as he pushed my hand and laughed.

“What?” I asked acting oblivious to the whole situation.

“You pinched my nose like this!!” he said as he pinched his nose again. Then he jumped because he was startled by how hard he had pinched himself.

“Stop freaking yourself out!!” I said in between laughing.

Then I heard my mother call “ten minutes kids!!’

“Yes momma!!” I said as I grabbed my clothes, turned on cartoons, and got dressed while the kids watched Elmo.

When I was finished my mother was honking the horn on her car!!

“We’re coming jeeeeeez!!” I said as I grabbed my coach purse and wallet and grabbed a kid on each hand. Then we ran down the stairs hopped in my Mercedes convertible and followed my mom who drove like a crazy teenager.

When we reached the hotel my kids jumped out of the car and ran inside.

“O shit!” I said as I struggled to keep up with them in my three inch heels!! Haha

“Kids STOP!!” I said as I grabbed them by the collar.

“Come on mommy we’re gonna be late…DADDY!!” they both yelled as they broke free of my grasp.

“Daddy?” I said as I turned around.

“What’s up kiddies?!” Jontrell asked as he scooped them up in his arms.

So I walked over to him and took my kids out of his arms.

“Stalker!” I whispered as I took my kids and smiled.

“Please I aint no stalker this is just a coincidence!!” he said as he squeezed my waist.

“Sure you know you just can’t keep away from me.” I said as I walked off leaving him speechless!!

“Mommy why did we leave daddy?” Chrissie asked as she looked back over my shoulder and placed her tiny fingers in her mouth.

“Because he doesn’t have a reservation!” I said as I checked our names off on the list.

“Oh!” she said quietly.

“You guys go wait with gramma okay?” I said as I nudged them in her direction.

As soon as I knew they were safe in their grammas’ care I pretended to need to fix my shoe. So I sat down and watched out of the corner of my eye as Jontrell lounged over to the sign in desk and gave his name.

“Umm sorry sir but your name is not on the list!” the Hispanic lady said as she double checked herself.

“Man you must be joking im on that list and if im not im sure you can hook me up!” JT said as he waved a fifty dollar bill in her face.

“I’ll take you in on that offer” she said as she quickly snatched the bill out of his hand and stuffed it in her bra.

“Right this way sir!” she said as she motioned him towards the ball room.

As they passed by he smiled his sexy smile and blew me a kiss. I just rolled my eyes and stood up. I could see my kids getting their food with their gramma so I walked over and grabbed a plate. As soon as I grabbed my plate my kids were done and had headed into the main eating area and had left me alone with Jontrell and a million other people.

“Stalker” I said as I smelled his scent wash over me.

“How many times I have to tell you I aint stalkin you!!” he said as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

I smiled to myself as I continued down the food tables.

“So where have you been?” I asked as I pretended to ignore the fact that he was so close to me.

“Everywhere” he said bluntly as he grabbed some food and followed me to my table.

“Well that’s very specific!” I said sarcastically as I sat down next to my kids.

Jontrell sat on the far side of our long table. He sat down slowly and cautiously.

“Daddy you should sit by mommy!” Jordan said as he took a big bite of his food.

“Naw that’s okay lil man I think I’ll just chill all the way over here.” He said as he shrank down in his chair.

I laughed to myself quietly as I wiped the syrup off of Jordan’s lips.

When we finished our ‘munch’ as chrissie called it we all left together. Me and the kids returned to our 6 bedroom house. I don’t know why my dad went and bought me such a bug house when he knew I didn’t have that many people to look after but he just had some extra money so he decided to buy it. It was my graduation present along with my car. My parents pretty much bought me everything. I didn’t even have to bring out money to buy my kids clothes…

And my mother returned to her house and I really don’t know where Jontrell went but I honestly don’t care. Obviously I had thought too soon because as soon as I pulled up into my 3 car garage I felt my cell phone vibrating. I looked down and saw it was JT. “Why Lord, why?” I asked to myself as I unbuckled my seatbelt and turned off the car.

“JT what do you want?” I asked as I opened the door for my kids to get out.

“I want you” he said softly.

“Shut up, you must have gone lost your mind boy!” I said as I looked around.

“I have because im sprung off you!” he said as I heard a car coming up the street.

Then I hung up the phone and prayed to God that JT wasn’t here.

But unfortunately this was fate he was here.

“JT go home!!” I yelled as I went inside and tried to shut my door but he forced it open.

“Girl you know you can’t live with out me!” he said as he put his arms around my waist.

“Boy get off me!!” I said as I walked into the kitchen.

“Will you just listen to me?” he asked as he followed me in.

“Umm how bout no!!” I said as I washed my hands.

“Well I know you think it aint my place to say how I feel but im gonna say it anyways cuz I gotta keep it real, I know you’re tired of trying to make me see somethin that’s truly not!! Gurl I love you!! I wanna get back with you just give me another chance!!” he said as he sat up on my couch.

“Umm how bout this…HELL NAW!!” I said as I smacked him.

“Okay I see how it is!” he said as he touched his cheek.

“Call me” he said as he kissed my left cheek and walked out.

I just rolled my eyes and locked the door behind him. What was I gonna do with him?

I watched out the window as he drove off.

“Momma what are you doing?” chrissie asked as she took her wet fingers and tugged at my jeans.
“Just looking at the front yard.” I lied.

“Oh well im watchin Elmo with Jordan!!” she said as she looked upstairs.

“That’s cool!!” I said as I sat down in an armchair.

“Do you wanna come with us?” she asked as she put her fingers back in her mouth.

“Okay but chrissie babey you shouldn’t suck your fingers unless you want jacked up teeth when you’re in high school!!” I said as I gently pulled her fingers outta her mouth.

But right when I closed my eyes she stuck those fingers right back in her mouth.

As soon as I got up to my room my phone started ringing. I looked at the caller I.D. and it read “momma” I didn’t answer I just let her leave a message because I didn’t feel like talking to anyone right now.

… “Honey we’re going up to Tahoe tomorrow so start packing!! Haha, It’s supposed to snow soon so we’re gonna go up and stay in our cabin house thingy!!” my mother said over the answering machine.

“UGH!!” I said as I fell back on my bed. “Man I just came back from traveling only to find myself booked for another trip!!”

Then I fell asleep for what felt like three minutes but what was really three hours!

“Momma you are tired?” chrissie asked as she rubbed her eye with her fist.

“No momma is slEEEpy!” I said as I yawned. “And chrissie babey is slEEEpier than me!!” I said as I looked at my ceiling fan.

“Momma can we watch TV?” chrissie asked as she hopped up on my bed.

“Yea I guess!” I said as I pulled her up to my stomach.

“I wanna watch more Elmo!!” she said as she grabbed the remote and pretended to use it like a phone!

“Well you can’t watch Elmo if you are using our remote as a phone.” I said as I laughed.

“NOOO mommy you have to PRETEND!!” she said as she looked at me like I was some kind of crazy person!!

“Okay sowi!!” I said as I rolled my eyes. She must’ve played with that remote for an hour at least just pretending to make calls out of state…

“Chrissie why don’t you go check up on your bro okay?” I asked as I pulled her hair back into a ponytail.

“Check on my broskie?” she asked as she hopped off the bed.

“Yea!!” I said as I smiled.

“Okay mommy!” she said as she walked off.

“Man I just want to sleep!!” I said as I stood up and started packing up for our trip.

“Momma brotha is slEEping!!” chrissie said as she put her finger on her mouth.

“O he’s slEEping?” I said as I imitated her.

“Yes!!” she said as she jumped up and down with laughter.

“Well come here because you need to help me pack because we are going to the SNOW!!” I said as I threw her up in the air and caught her as I fell back on my bed.

“Haha” “ooo mommy you made the TV move!!” chrissie said as she pointed.

“Oh wow” I said as I looked at my 74 inch plasma TV that sat in the middle of my wall.

“Well you go play with your broskie or something okay?” I asked as I plopped her down on the floor.

“Okay” she said as she stood up and went to her room. She was probably going to watch Timon and Pumba on her Disney princess TV.

THE NEXT MORNING…

“Wake up chrissie!!” I said as I shook her awake. Then when she showed signs of life I walked over to Jordan’s room and shook him awake as well. “Lil man!!” I said as I pulled his covers off of him.

Then I walked downstairs and started making breakfast. We were having CEREAL!! Haha

“Momma I want froot loops!!” chrissie yelled from her bathroom. You see chrissie had a bathroom in her room. She had a tiny sink that she didn’t need a stool to use, and a tiny tub, and a tiny toilet and they were all pink!!

“Momma I want apple jacks!!” Jordan called from his bathroom which was the same as Chrissie’s although Jordan’s was blue with superman all over it, and Chrissie’s had yellow and white flowers.

“Okay! Chrissie, Jordan you guys’ clothes are on your beds!” I said as I heard their taps running to wash their faces.

Then I heard tiny feet running down our spiral stair case.

AFTER BREAKFAST...

“Okay is everybody here?” I asked as I looked at our backseat.

“Yea!!” chrissie, and Jordan said in unison.

“Okay then! Drive!” I said to Trey who had volunteered to drive us up to Tahoe.

“Don’t rush me Woman!” he said as he started up the car and glided down the street.

I argued about the smallest stupidest things with Trey the whole ride. My mother didn’t want to sit in the front so I had to. I argued about where he put his elbow on the arm rest, how fast or slow he was driving, the way he slammed on his breaks every five seconds even though it wasn’t his fault because we were stuck in some major traffic behind some complete idiot who didn’t have four wheel drive and was driving through snow with much difficulty!! After a while the kids were asleep and my mother was just complaining about every little thing.

She talked about how her feet hurt. How her leg was asleep, how she couldn’t hear because of my arguing…I just wanted to knock her out.

“Man you kids argue like an old married couple!!” my mother said every five minutes!!

“Oh please!” I said as I smiled to myself. I didn’t like him!! I tried to convince myself of this the whole ride there but I would never fully believe it. It was just something about him that drew you to him.

The next four to six hours of tormenting breaking and flying cuss words and hand signals was perhaps the worst time of my life!! Especially since I was stuck with JT of all people. I don’t know why my mother insisted on him following us everywhere we go!! It’s actually rather annoying.

“Man fuck you!!” I said after I couldn’t hold in my anger any longer.

“Bitch what time?” he asked as he stopped the car. Traffic wasn’t moving so we couldn’t go anywhere.

“Shut up!” I said as I looked out the window.

“Aye we can do it anytime we got all day.” He said as he smiled.

“Boy!” I said as I whipped my head around and smacked that sucka.

“Fuck!” he said as he sucked his teeth and turned away from me.

“Yea that’s right!! I aint ya bitch, ya hoe, ya nothin!! Nigga!! So you besta watch how you talk to me before you get beat cuz this is a big gurl game so get with tha program or get to steppin!” I said as I got up in his face.

“Look at me when im talking to you!” I said as I pulled his chin to face me. But right when he looked at me I was speechless. I didn’t have anything else to say. Well I did but I couldn’t say anything. He moved his face closer to mine but couldn’t move away for some reason. Some outside force held me there. Then our lips met, I closed my eyes as I felt his hands on my back.

The boy could kiss…that’s all I can say.

As we separated I was tingling. I blushed and turned my face from his as I sat back in my seat.

“Im sorry!” he said quietly.

“Umm…it’s okay…don’t be” I said as I looked back at my kids to make sure everybody else was sleeping. They were. Well I could never tell with my mother. She was probably awake because I could see a smile spread across her face.

“Great!” I mumbled to myself.

“What?” JT asked as he stared at me awkwardly. I could tell that he had been talking to me because what I had said didn’t quite fit with what he was talking about.

“Umm…nothin just talking to myself”

“O great now I got a crazy who talks to herself riding in my car!” he said as we pulled up to the cabin.

And just my luck right when we got there it started snowing hard. In a minimum of three minutes the snow was covering the tires.

“Oh great now we’re stuck here and we’ve gotta get the stuff out of the snow!!” I said as I pulled my kids out of the car and got them inside.

AFTER ABOUT 30 MINUTES…

We finally found a smarter more efficient way of getting all of our stuff out of the car and inside.

“Okay you push and I’ll pull!!” I said as I loaded up a suitcase on my children’s sled.

“Okay ready…one…two…three!” JT said as we started moving the last suitcase inside.

“Okay you go close the trunk and I’ll get this stuff the rest of the way.” I said as I pulled the sled up the steps with much difficulty considering the fact that the snow was still falling and I was small…

“Ouch!” I said as I fell four feet under the snow. But before I could sink anymore I felt strong arms pulling me up. I was soaking wet.

“Here we go” JT said as he pulled me back but we fell over on the porch and I landed hard on him. “Oh fuck!!” he said as he pushed me off. Unfortunately I had landed on the wrong spot with keys and a phone in my back pocket.

“Sowi, sowi, sowi!!” I said as I turned around.

“It’s all good!” he said as he rolled around on the floor.

“Man now we’re soaking wet!” I said trying to change the subject.

“Thanks for helping me though!” I said as I started lugging the stuff inside. But me with my high heel boots fell again. But before I could land JT had pushed me up.

“Excuse you!” I said as I took his hands off my butt.

“Naw it aint even like that…” he started explaining.

“Im just playing with you!” I said as I kissed his cheek. “Thanks!” I said as I laughed and walked inside.

“No problem!” he said as he stood up and followed me in.

Much to my disliking we didn’t have enough rooms. We were one short. The kids were with me and my mom had her own room. But we needed one more. See this is why we should’ve gone to our bigger cabin but I wasn’t expecting to have extras… ‘JT’…

“So how are we gonna work this out?” I asked as I looked at the rooms.

“Well JT can sleep on the couch!” ma momma said as she looked over and frowned at the small couch.

“Like I’ll fit on that!” he said as he hopped on it. He could only fit half of his body across it.

“Well do you have any better ideas?” I asked as I looked at him and placed my hand on my hip.

“Yea…” he started to say but then he stopped.

“Well?” I asked expecting a good comeback.

“Nothin I can jus chill out here on tha couch.” He said as he sat down.

“Jordin why don’t you jus let him bunk wit you and I’ll keep the kids.” Ma momma said as she grabbed their suitcases.

“Naw momma why don’t he bunk wit you!” I said sarcastically!

“Don’t you take that tone with your mother!” ma momma said as she raised her hand to my face. “Now you two will bunk together and I don’t wanna hear another word of it!! Your room is big enough to bunk at least five people comfortably!!” ma momma said as she opened the door to my humongous room.

“Whuteva!” I said as I looked outside at the steadily falling snow hoping to find a short cut…a way out of this mess.

“Well im down with that!” JT said as he looked at me and smiled that sexy smile of his. I couldn’t help but smile back. But after a while I caught myself and turned away before I started blushing.

“Don’t be shy!” I heard ma momma say as she ushered the kids to their new room.

“Fuck” I whispered under my breath. Then I turned around and walked off calmly like nothing had even happened.

I walked into my room and shut the door so I could change.

I changed into some grey sweats that said PINK on the back in big bold pink letters.

Then I pulled on a hot pink beater and pulled my hair into a long thick bun. As soon as I finished I washed my face with my Neutrogena wave®. When I rinsed my face I saw JT behind me he had no shirt on only his boxers.

Damn he was so-o-o-o-o sexy!! Then he looked over at me so out of pure shock and panic I splashed soap in my eye.

“Ouchies!!” I said as I jumped up and down while the burning sensation subsided.

“What happened?” JT asked as he turned me to face him and bent over to look at my eye.

“I got soap in my eye!” I said as I struggled to open my stinging eye.

“It’s red” he said as he got some cold water on his finger and dropped it in my eye.

I sucked my teeth so hard I thought I might just swallow them!!

“Better?” he said as he blew in my eye

“Yea! A lil” I said as I let my tears fall out of the stinging eye.

“I forgot how sexy you were when you cried!” he said playfully.

“Shut up!!” I said as I smiled and wiped my face with a hand towel.

“Just statin the truth!!” he said as he smacked ma ass.

“Boy you besta keep ya hands to yourself!” I said as I kicked his butt with the side of my foot.

“And who’s gonna make me?” he asked as he pushed himself up against me.

“Boy!” I said as I tried to push myself up from the wall but he was too big. And before I knew it my lips were against his and his hands were in my shirt.

I didn’t try to fight it, because it felt good. I hadn’t had that feeling in a long time. I had dated a couple of complete crazy’s that had no game and the only reason I even considered them is because they were fine as hell!!

There were some crazy ones that I had to make some life changing adjustments to escape their relationships. It was actually kind of scary. But JT was the only one that wasn’t crazy the only thing with him is that he was scared of the responsibility!!

Every dude I find that has something going for them always has one problem that just gets on ma last nerve!!

Then it was over, as soon as it had begun.

Then he smiled as he backed off. He pulled on a black wife beater and some matching basketball shorts.

“What you smilin at boy?” I asked as I plucked my eyebrows.

“Pshhhhhh…not you!” he said as he smirked

“You know you was smilin at me!” I said as I smoothed out my eyebrows.

“Man how could I love some one or even be in any way attracted to someone with such bushy eyebrows?” he asked as he slipped on his shoes.

“Whuteva…you is just a hater!!” I said as I let my hair down.

“On what?” he asked as he stood up.

“On what?...o on all this babey!” I said as I strutted around him.

“Still aint much?” he said as he walked around me.

“Whoa…it aint much? Are you sure?” I asked as I kissed him slowly.

“Think about ALL that!!” I said as I left him stunned in the room.

LATER ON THAT NITE…

Okay so as usual me and JT were arguing about somethin stoopid again!!

“Naw you shut up!!” I screamed as I got up in JT’s face.

“Bitch respect your elders!!” he said as he pushed my forehead!!

“Why you keep callin me bitch? You is the only bitch I see in this room!” I said as I tried to walk off.

JT grabbed my arm forcefully but I looked down at my arm and back up at him. And you should’ve seen the look of fear that spread through his face as he let go of my arm and put his hands up.

“Stop flirting you two!” my mother said as she passed by.

I ignored this comment.

Then I continued back to my room.

“Momma are you okae?” chrissie asked as she crawled into my lap.

“Yea im fine chrissie babey” I said as kissed her forehead and pushed her hair out of her face. Her bouncy curls just flew back into her face.

“Momma?” lil man said from the doorway.

“Why do you and daddy argue all the time?” he asked as he jumped on the bed by me.

“Because your daddy is a bum” I said as I played with his tiny curls.

“Mommy stop!!” he said as he fixed his perfect curls.

“What?” I asked as I put my hands up.

“You’re gonna mess up ma hair! I have to look fresh!” he said as he posed.

“Boy you are a trip!!” I said as I tickled him.

“Stop!!” He said as he ran into the bathroom.

“Okay Jordan come out now im not gonna tickle you!” I said as me and chrissie hid on the sides of the door.

“Are you lying?” he asked as he turned the knob slightly.

“No brotha just come out!!” chrissie said as she jumped up and down with her hands covering her mouth so he wouldn’t hear her laughter.

“Okay!!” Jordan said as he opened the door.

As soon as he opened it me and chrissie grabbed him.

“Hey!! You guys cheated!” he said as he snatched his arms away.

“Awe lil man are you mad?” I asked as I looked at him.

“Yes!” he said as he started to pout!

“Awe we were just playing!” I said as I hugged him tite.

“But you lied to me!” he said as he jumped on the bed and covered his head with a pillow.

“Brotha it’s okay!” chrissie said as she hugged him.

“No get off of me!” he said as he tried to pry Chrissie’s hands off of him. But chrissie was a strong little girl perhaps stronger then lil man.

“UGH!! Sista let go!!” he said after he had given up.

“Only if you forgive me and mommy and play with us and you have to be happy!” chrissie said as she looked up at him.

“FINE!” he said uncomfortably

“PROMISE!” chrissie said as she loosened her grip a little.

“PROMISE” lil man said

“PINKIE SWEAR!” chrissie said as she backed off and held out her pinkie.

“PINKIE SWEAR!” he said as he entwined his pinkie with hers.

“Okay so we’re all happy now?” I asked as I grabbed both of them.

“Yes!!” they both said at once.

“Are we gonna have hot cocoa with marsh mellows?” I asked as I looked at them.

“Yes!”

“Are we gonna like it?” I asked.

“Yes”

“Are we still mad?” I asked as I looked at them

“Yes! Wait I mean no!” chrissie and lil man said confused by this little trick.

“Haha okay well lets go get our hot cocoa!” I said as I stood up.

“can daddy have some too?” chrissie babey asked as she looked at me with that perfect little angel face that had a perfect puppy dog pout spread across it!

“I guess!” I said drowsily. “But then it’s bed time deal?” I asked as I looked at the clock.

“Deal!” lil man and chrissie screamed!!

“Wow…okay then” I said as I helped them up.

When we had our hot cocoa we all sat down at the table…me, chrissie, lil man, and gramma, but no daddy because he was a LATE bum!!

He got back home late. I was the only one up. I was high off of hot cocoa and coffee.

When he walked through the door I switched on a light and asked him “where’ve you been?”

“None of your business!” he said as he hung up his jacket and took off his shoes.

“Your kids saved you a cup of hot cocoa but you weren’t there to drink it so it’s cold now. “They also went to bed again like all the years they’ve been alive, with only a good nite kiss from their mother. The only difference is you are actually available to participate you just choose not to!” I said as I stood up.

“Listen im sorry im still new to this” he said as he took of his over shirt.

“Well you wouldn’t be if you had been there when they were born and actually stayed with us the whole time!” I said getting a little annoyed.

“Well I was scared…” he started to say.

“you know what…you always say that…that’s your only excuse….you were scared…okay well how many times do I have to tell you that I was scared too…but at least I was always there!” I said angrily.

“Well I can’t change that now can i?” he asked as he looked at me solemnly.

“Actually you can…you can’t change the past but you can fix the present!” I said as I shoved the cup into his hands. It spilled all over his white wife beater. And with saying that I left him out there to clean up the mess and locked the door to our room.

The kids were with me tonite and he was out on the couch for most likely the rest of the trip.

THE NEXT MORNING…

When I woke up the kids were still sleeping. Jordan had his arm around Chrissie and you could just barely see there tiny stomachs fall and rise.

I got up and stretched then I picked out my clothes and took a shower. When I got out of the shower the kids were gone and the door was open.

Then the phone started ringing. I grabbed the phone and started getting dressed.

“Hello?” I said as I dried my hair.

“What’s up lil momma?” I heard a familiar voice say through the speaker.

“Marcellus?” I said as a smile spread across my face.

“Who were you expecting?” he said

“I miss you so much babe!” I said as I sat down on the bed.

“Babe?” JT said as he walked in and put his stuff down on the bed.

“Who’s that?” Marcellus said suspiciously.

“Oh that’s just the help!” I said as I motioned him out.

“HELP?” JT said as he looked at me.

“Now what was that?” Marcellus asked.

“Nothing, I have a cold…ahuuh…” I said as I gave a fake cough.

“Oh well you go get that fixed okay?” he said as he laughed.

“Okay babey well I gotta go, tell the kids I said ‘hi’” Marcellus said.

“I will!” I said as I looked at JT.

“Well I love you” Marcellus said as he coughed.

“I love you too” I said as I smiled to myself.

“Awe!!” JT said as he covered his mouth.

“Get that cough fixed!! Okay bye!!” Marcellus said.

“I will... bye” I said as I threw a pillow at JT.

As soon as I hung up the phone JT plopped down on the bed, laid back and started tossing his basketball up in the air a few times.

“So who was that?” he asked like a fag.

“None of your business.” I said as I moved over a little bit.

“Well I have some friends coming over” he said as he stopped tossing the ball.

“Okay, like I care! As long as they stay out of the house” I said as I got up and left him.

As soon as I stepped outside I saw a truck pull up. JT ran out to meet his friends. They all greeted themselves. Then I walked over and said ‘hi’ to everyone.

His friends looked like nasty freaks; they were all staring at me.

Then JT showed them to the basketball court as he winked at me.

He was still as good as ever. His team was killin’ ‘em but he was a ball hog and I could tell that his teammates were kinda annoyed with this.

Then one of his friends came over and introduced himself to me.“Hi” he said as he stood in front of me.

“Hi” I said as I sat on a swing.

“Do you mind?” he said as he hand motioned that he wanted to sit on the swing next to me.

“Oh no not at all” I said as I let go of the chains on my swing and started swinging slowly.

“So you and JT are…you know…” he said shyly.

“Together?...Oh no!” I said excitedly… “No he’s my ex husband” I said as I grabbed onto the chains tight.

“Oh…were you guys serious?” he said as he started swinging with me. I really didn’t think it was any of his business but I didn’t really care who knew.

“Yea I guess you can say that, not in my opinion… we have kids though.” I said as I rolled my eyes.

“Oh how many?” he said as he looked around.

“Two, twins…they’re inside.” I said as I watched him look around like crazy.

“Oh, are they as beautiful as their mother?” he asked as he smiled at me. “Or are they ugly like their daddy?” he asked as he flipped off JT.

“Haha, umm… well…” then I heard a car.

“I’ll be right back.” I said trying to find an excuse.

“Oh wait here’s my number, you know…I don’t think there are many places to go here so when we get back to the city hit me up lil momma!” he said as he handed me his card. Then he licked his lips and walked off backwards.

“Umm I have a boyfriend” I said as I tried to hand back the card.

“Oh that’s cool…keep it” he said as he closed my fingers. “Nice hands…very soft” he said as he licked the fingers he had used to touch me.

I shivered a little and made a mental note to one…never let JT bring his friends over…two….never to talk to his friends…and three to wash my hands when I got back.

Then I remembered that I had heard a car. I walked over to the edge of the sloping driveway and saw a black BMW convertible. I knew this car…then I saw a handsome figure step out of the car. He pulled off his hood. And stepped out.

“Marcellus!!” I said as I ran over to embrace him.

“Hey babey!!” he said as he kissed me. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he put his arms around my waist.

I saw JT stop playin and put the ball under his arm as he walked over.

“So this is the guy you were talking to earlier.” He said as he spit and almost hit Marcellus’ shoes.

“Oh and I guess this is the help?” he said totally oblivious to who he was.

“Oh no im her husband.” He said as he shook Marcellus’ hand.

“EX husband!” I said as I flipped him off.

“Awe so it’s like that?” JT said as he threw the ball backwards.

“Get a life!” I said as I grabbed Marcellus’ arm and pulled him to the trunk.

“I’ll get your stuff” I said as I bent over to open the trunk.

“Naw I can get it” he said as he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind.

“No I got it!” I said as I tried to pull his suitcase out of the car.

“Naw it’s kinda heavy, but thanks anyways!” he said as he kissed my lips.

“Okay” I said as I messed up his hair and walked up the hill.

“You’re welcome, and nice tattoo!” he said as he pointed to the tattoo on the lower part of my back.

“Haha!” I said exasperatedly as I pulled down my shirt.

“Oh don’t forget to say ‘hi’ to the kids, they’ll never forgive you if you don’t” I said as I pulled his arm.

“Okay im comin!” he said as he struggled to close his trunk with only one hand. Then he ran up with his suitcase.

When I walked by JT pulled my arm. Marcellus looked back and stopped.

“Naw it’s okay babe I’ll meet you there jus one second!” I said as I pulled my arm away from JT. “What do you want?” I said in a hushed tone.

“How come I didn’t know that you had a tat?” he asked as he pulled at my shirt.

I slapped his hand away. And flipped him off.

“What time mommy?” he said as he backed up.

“In your dreams.!” I said as I walked off.

As I walked off I heard his sicko friend tell JT that ‘I so wanted him’ and then JT pushed him.

I laughed to myself as I caught up to Marcellus.

“What was that all about?” he said as he looked at me.

“Nothing just a bunch of desperate Fuckers” I said as I laughed and walked in to find the kids. Marcellus followed close behind.

“Kids I got a surprise for you! “I said as I looked out for them.

“What is it mommy?” Chrissie said as she walked out still focusing on the TV, with her two fingers in her mouth.

“Look!” I said as I snapped my fingers.

She gasped as she saw who was there. “Cellus!!” she said as she ran over to him. He squatted to her level right as she jumped. He caught her and tossed her in the air a few times.

“Chrissie babey!!” Marcellus said as he tickled her.

Then I saw Jordan walk out. He didn’t even say anything to him he just tried to walk by.

“Aye lil man it’s Cellus aren’t you gonna say hi?” I said as I pulled him over.

“Wuzzup lil man?” Marcellus said as he put down Chrissie.

He still didn’t say anything to Marcellus. He tried to walk by I pulled and twisted his ear towards us.

“What the Hell is wrong with you?” I said angrily.

“OOO mommay!!” Chrissie said as she covered her mouth and ran into the room.

“Aye babey….” Marcellus said as he stepped in between me and him.

“Fine!” I said as I put my head on Marcellus’ shoulder and he held me.

The next thing I knew Marcellus Yelped. Jordan had kicked him in the back of his calf.

“Aye why are you acting like this?” I said as I pushed Marcellus aside. He tried to grab my arm but I didn’t let him.

“I want daddy!” lil man said as he started to cry.

“Say ‘hi’ to Marcellus then go to your grammas’ room and tell her what you did!!” I said as I tapped the back of his head.

“HI!” he said angrily and then he ran down the hall.

“Stoopid ass kids!” I said as I went and sat on Marcellus’ lap. Then he pulled me back so I was lying on him with my head on his shoulder. Then he kissed my neck.

“Stop, haha” I said as I started to laugh. Then he kissed my lips and I moved my hands to his face as I turned to face him more.

“Okay, okay no one is bout ta be getting freaky in this livin room!!” JT said as he barged in.

“Get out!” I said as I separated from Marcellus. “Don’t you have your friends to play with?” I said sarcastically.

“No I told them to get tha Fuck off ma property!!” he said as he sat down across from us and took off his shoes.

“Why were they beating you?” I said as I covered my nose.

“NO!” he said as he looked up at me and Marcellus who were almost choking from the stench.

“Oh do you have a problem with this?” he said as he threw his big shoe over to us.

“Man you and ya big ass shoes get outta here!” I said as I threw his shoe at tha door.

“Woman!” he said as he stood up trying to act all hard.

“Aye back up dogg!” Marcellus said as he stood up.

“Man this does not concern you!” JT said as he looked up at Marcellus.

“Well I can make it concern me” Marcellus said as he raised his fist.

“Aye Marcellus, JT!” I said as I stood in between them. “Come on babe!” I said as I backed him up.

“You lucky ma gurl was here, cuz you know I don’t play I woulda beat tha mess outta you!” Marcellus said as he looked over at JT. Then he shook me off of him.

“Come on!” I said as I brought him into my room.
“Are you okay?” I asked as I put my arms around his neck loosely.

“Yea!” he said as he kissed me. Then he backed me up until he was on top of me on the bed.

“Oh…Aye…Come on man…!” JT said as he burst in again. “This is my room too!” he said as he looked away and waved his shoes around.

“One second!” I said as I got up and walked over to the door.

“Oh so is it my turn now?” JT asked as he smiled and nodded his head to Marcellus. Then he puckered his lips.

“You want some?” I asked as I looked at him then he nodded his head again.

“Okay back up just a lil!” I said as I pushed him. “Okay one…two…three!” I said as I pushed him and closed the door. Then I locked it. And laughed as I walked over to the bed.

“Wow” Marcellus said as he grabbed me and pulled me close to him.

“Now where were we?” he asked as he kissed me.

“I think that was right about where we were!” I said as I laughed and closed the drapes.

It was dark outside already and it was starting to snow again.

“It does nothing but snow here!” I said as I looked out the slit in the blinds and then I walked back over.

“Im gonna change” I said as I pulled off my shirt in front of him.

“Im cool!” Marcellus said as he jumped back on the bed.

“You sicko!” I said as I threw my shirt at him.

“Aye stripper even better!” he said as he took off his shirt.

“Shut up!” I said as I unclipped my bra. Then I walked into the bathroom.

“Awe no more show!” he said as I locked the door.

“Nope!” I said as I pulled on a light pink spaghetti strapped shirt and some matching shorts.

“Okay then…!” he said as he walked away.

“Then I pulled my hair up into a bopper bun as me n ma gurlies called it. They call me the bopper queen because ma main dude Mareco used to call me that!!

When I walked out I finished washing my face I walked out and to my shock I saw something I probably shouldn’t have.

“Dude put some clothes on!!” I said as I covered my eyes.

“Gurl just turn around!” he said as he pulled on a shirt.

“Okay you can look now!” he said as I opened my eyes.

“Are you sure?” I said as I walked over.

“Yea!” he said as he pulled my hands off of my eyes. As soon as he did this I gave him a kiss.

“Let’s go eat” I said as I smiled and pulled his hand towards the door.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa…you’re goin out into the kitchen like that?” he said as he pulled me back from the door.

“Yea why?” I asked as I looked down at what I was wearing.

“Umm here wear this instead okay?” he said as he tossed me some of his pajama pants and a bath robe.

“Umm how bout no!” I said as I tossed them back. “I’ll just wear this!” I said as I took some sweats and pulled them over my bootie shorts.

“That’s better but I still think you should wear another shirt!” he said as he sat down.

“Whatever!” I said as I laughed and pulled him out of the room.

“Wait you’re gonna sag your pants like that where everybody can see your stuff?” he said as he pulled me back into the room.

“Aye come on now…” I said as I pulled him out to the kitchen.

“Finally the two love birds came out!” ma momma said as she put some food on the table.

“Move JT!” I said as pushed him outta his chair so me and Marcellus could sit together. I sat by chrissie and Marcellus and ma momma sat by JT and Marcellus. And Jordan sat by his sista.

“For the food we’re about to wecieve let us all be twuly tankful!” chrissie said as we all released hands.

“Wow…good job Chrissie babey” Marcellus said as he smiled at her.

“Man she don’t want your compliments.” JT said as he leaned back in his chair. Then he leaned a lil too far and fell over.

“Pshhhhhh haha!! Wow!!” I said as I saw him.

AFTER OUR VERY HECTIC DINNER…