Authors note: This is for my friend Mary

Authors note: This is for my friend Mary. Love you dear, and may things get better, through your strange and first time experience.

Listen to me as I speak

Hear the emotion

And the hurt that I am trying to keep

Deep inside me

I do not wish to hurt you

And I do not wish to break your heart

But things aren’t working

And they may never get better

If we continue going on

In this way

We are both unhappy

And unfulfilled

For we are not giving, seeing, or letting

Our real selves out to each other

We both are hiding

Shrinking away

Whether you believe me or not

You must see it in me, in you

And others have seen it too

They see my pain and withdrawal

And they see your giving

And your undoing

For I do not love you the way you love me

And if I could I would

To ease your pain

But I cannot force my heart

To love you

Despite your pain

Can we please remain friends?

Though I can’t bear to lose you,

But for you to hate me

Would be my shame

And undoing

My shame for letting you go

This way

And I want to say sorry

So sorry

Because I never meant

To cause you pain