i wish i could cut out my tongue for the words that i have cut you with

I wish I could cut out my tongue

9:12 pm 11-12-07

I wish I could cut out my tongue for the words that I have cut you with.

Its acid seeping deep.

I wish I could chop off my hands for the bruises that you have.

my hands,

longing to caress you,

only hurt you.

I wish I could rip my heart from my chest

and cease my very being.

I can feel your heart ache.

I know that it is my fault.

I have hurt you.

I have beat you.

I have verbally abused you.

I have physically abused you.

I have heard you cry

your poor whimpering tears

throughout my soul.

It makes me sick.

I am so sick of it.

I am sick of myself.

I am a monster.

Mean and cruel to the core.

You deserve the best.

I cannot give you that.