How can you do this to me?

You send me to a place where I do not belong

My heart, mind, and gut do not agree

I cannot do this, mother

I am not ready

I doubt I ever will be

I know what I am doing

I know do not want to be part of this

Inside, it tears me up

That cheerful voice you hear?

It’s an act, a mask

I can’t say how I truly feel about it

Not without being too blunt

Not without feeling sick

But I feel that already

Please, mother

Don’t make me