i sat on the black mats
against the spring valley side
waiting for them to enter
& slam their bodies down next to mine
like always.

i sat there
waiting for their dead weight
to fill the space to make up for my
lack of weight
but they never came.

i waited for,
anxiously anticipated,
their arrival
& was excited to see them
walk through the door.

i didn’t know what i’d say
but i never do—
all that matters is that
they’re there
to fill the void.

i need them there
to push me around,
annoy me even,
just to remind me that
they’re there for(with) me.

i then wondered
if they knew i was crushed
absolutely crushed
when they didn’t come & fill up
the empty space
next to me.

a/n: Not that I make it incredibly obvious or anything.
But you’d almost think it’d be natural instinct
to annoy the hell out of your “distant” (best) friend.
(Or maybe not.)

To explain-
they came in, & although they sat near me,
they didn't sit next to me.
The sat too far away to be considered next to me,
& they didn't even talk to me.
They didn't even talk to me when I came in to do abs.
They yelled my name at me from hundreds of feet away
while I was (waiting to be) throwing disc.
But they couldn't talk to me,
face-to-face,
in the friggin wrestling room?
(That'd be the (almost) typical track practice for you.)