ONE SHOT

i typed all of this on the spot, not knowing where i wanted this to go or where i wanted it to start.
this is something that actually has only a little bit to do with anything i've experienced,
so i'm sorry if the feeling conveyed in this is inaccurate or underexaggerated.

read away.
(i don't own walgreens or ANTM)

one word→ bound

–

i woke up, saw your face, and cringed; you're every bit as beautiful as you were last night, last week, last year. hard jaw and sunken eyes, i could see the coldness of your heart inside, underneath the foggy, clouded glaze. even in your sleep, i could tell life had hardened you, made into a stone but even quieter, even more unmoving. your hands, though calloused, were gentle and cold, though. as if you were dead, no longer living on the inside.

they slipped and fell across my skin like ice, leaving trails of shivers and goosebumps and desire. the curve of your fingers fit against the bend of my back; fell into place just behind my waist.

every limb of yours twisted around me in every possible way at anytime you could find my compliance and submission, and found warmth in my body, my world. we're a piece of artwork, you always whisper, it's a wonder someone hasn't asked to paint our picture, yet.

tall, dark, and handsome, with brown eyes, thin, lanky form, and a brooding nature, you were right out of a best-selling novel on the walgreens book-racks.

your lips were full, and perfectly shaped, like the most-envied woman on america's next top model, but even softer, even gentler. you loved to lie till you fell asleep with your lips pressed against the bare skin of my shoulder or neck, feeling closer than you would with arms and legs tangled with mine, than if buried inside of me and digging into my skin with raw fingers.

but that's where all the beauty ended.

you had a dark humor, wishing men dead and woman raped, twistedly laughing just at the mere thought. your idea of joke consisted of extreme pain, extreme emotional distress, and a lot of terrified screaming. it involved "kidnapping" and "tricking" people, and just scaring them to tears with their worst fears. cruelly, and letting them believe they were facing death's door.

abusively, you'd always point out my faults, my mistakes, my slip-ups that even i myself hadn't noticed before your beration. i could see in your eyes that every pain, every fear you've every experience was being fought, being destroyed as you destroyed and renewed and remade me. ghosts and demons and criminals reflected in your eyes and heart and soul and i felt every bit of your pain as it transferred into me, becoming me and releasing you.

setting you free.

you'd croon the next day of the beauty of the reality vivantly set in my skin, and kiss all around the blue and the black and praise yourself for the creation. praise me for being the most beautiful work of art you've ever seen.

all the lies you'd spilled to me, so easily, so confidently, so smoothly, hit me in the face, again and again, each day, each morning. i remember each and every lie, and finding the truth of them all, feeling the binds of my heart hold tighter, refusing to let go and to face the truth, refusing to pull away from it's only source of happiness and bliss.

my mind fights and fills my body up with anger, with fear, with disgust and decides to get away, to break free, to find safety, but my body, my heart can never respond and i'm always willingly trapped where i (don't) want to be, where i learned to bleed.

where i learned to believe.

–

a/n: i'm glad this is a one-shot, instead of another somethin to add to my unfinished business list. i'd have killed myself for creating a new project. this is a bit of dark, angsty romance, mostly about "saving" the one you love. (no, nothing religious - i'm keeping my work away from that, so as to only have myself as an influence.)
what do you think?

(for some odd reason, how to save a life by the fray came to mind when i proofread this.)