This is what i fear now.

Fear

Fear

Unimaginable fear

Bombs, disguised by children who-

Are hidden enemies

Stones-

Cracking windshields of Humvees

Thrown by those children

Yet more children-

Give them candy and they’ll tell you secrets

Yet no children-

Take a look around

Even the “enemy” cares about the children

Trash-

To be feared?

BOOM!

Driving over those disguised, roadside bombs

NO!

The bodies, the bodies!

Her hand, lying to the left,

Her leg, to the right

He’s bleeding out

No! Why did he go?

WhyWhyWhyWHY??

Terrible, wrenching, aching

In and out, blackness

Wake up.

Who’s left? Me?

No. That can’t be. What about-

No. Dead. But-

Friends no longer

Collateral damage-killing civilians

What? Why? What for?

I hate this. This is fear

Not for me. Never for me.

What have I to do with this war?

God, this fear though.

Love is killing me.

I never wanted to be a soldier.

But if he is hurt, I have to be there.

I have to know

I can’t protect him.

I can only hope.

And what about the enemy?

What about their wives and children,

Waiting at home,

Praying to God, or Allah, or WHOEVER?!

For their husbands to come home

We’re all the same

We’re committing mass-suicide

Fear.

What if he leaves

And never returns?