yeah i'm as cool guy as they come
i took your daughter out in her pretty dress
and stared at her pert breasts while we danced
but my blood and my meat are just as red
and i got a ring on my right hand
my scalp's tanned since i switched the part
started shaving got a daytime job

wrote this song for every single
standard sad sack sausage package
with fond memories of baseball and their dad
singing, i am mister jugular and all that jazz
the bang bang bang hero
expectations curse