How can I describe Ian in one word? That's surprisingly difficult for me. Even after everything that's happened, he's still my hero. There was however a time, back with I couldn't say that. You know, back when I didn't want to be considered to know Ian. Now though, that everything is over with him and her, I've learned more from him that anyone. But to pick a single word to describe him...well, it doesn't work. I can't use words like trust, or stable, or caring. None of these fit him.

I'm fifteen myself, that's how old Ian was when he first had sex with Christina. Because of Ian and everything that happened to him I know I cannot trust anyone. Ian was stupid and let himself trust her. That was a mistake on his part. The wall of trust he had build up crumbled before him. It wasn't just his trust in her or my trust in him. No, it was everyones trust. Matt, Eric, and Reagan, they all expected something better that what he gave. Even though it wasn't Ian's fault, I can't say I trust him anymore. So my word for Ian will not be trust.

The point I'm at with Ian right now, I guess you could call us friends. Even I understand though that friendly as he is, Ian is not and never will be a stable person. He's the type of guy that is very easily swayed. Back with Ian was a stupid fifteen year old boy he let himself fall in with Christina. The drugs, the sex, everything, he let himself fall into that. Even though I know he still does the drugs and still drinks, after seeing what it did to him the first time, I can't get near them. I guess that's really why I could call Ian my hero. Seems like a pretty bad hero though, doesn't he? Wrong, his inability to be stable has caused me to be a more stable person. So, if he knows it or not, I've watched him. Still a child when everything went on with Ian I was able to learn. In any case, stable is not a word for Ian.

I don't know if I could say he was loving either. From what I know of Ian he has never truly loved but one person. The only person he has ever shown any amount of love for was my sister Reagan. The look of hurt he got last time he saw her, the words he said. Aside from Reagan Ian doesn't care. His apathy has always confused me.I know because of Ian that caring for one person is never going to help you. You have to love the things they love, the people they love. Ian just couldn't. So another word aside from loving.

To say 'sum up a person in one word' and expect me to be able to accomplish it is impossible. More importantly you made that person be someone who has taught me something. How can I sum that up so simply? I've thought alot about this, looked though the dictionary. There is no word to describe him. I don't know him that well. I've asked the people who knew Ian, they can't think of any words. So instead I took a phrase for Ian. 'They may forget the words you said, but they'll always remember how you made them feel.' Almost perfect for the way I feel about Ian. Everything he's done, everything he's said to me ever, I felt something. Almost the way you feel when you figure out something impossible with no one around. The feeling of glee, but sadness that no one can enjoy it with you. So in closing Ian is not trustworthy, stable, or caring. You cannot use a single word to describe Ian.