Author: stellamirandaa PM
A religious girl discovers feelings within herself that are a sin and questions the actual sin of falling in love. Is it better to love someone who is different or someone who you truly are attracted to? Lesbian Themes. No Sex Scenes. NOT GRAPHIC.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Angst - Words: 1,371 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 05-16-08 - Status: Complete - id: 2518463
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A Short Story I originally wrote for school but was not allowed to use it because it's 'inappropriate'. R+R.
These demons in my head…
She curled her index finger, calling me over, her beauty overpowering my resistance. She was a demon and a sin, but my religious prayers were powerless against the seduction of her body.
I felt my body become rigid, shaking from the effort of controlling my foreign lust. My knuckles whitened as they grasped the bottom of my beige pleated skirt. It rose above my knees, involuntarily exposing an inch of my pale aching thigh.
My religious instincts forced me to pull it back down, this time past my knees. Lust was a sin but I was certain that lusting for a beautiful woman was worse. But how could something so glorious be wrong?
I closed my eyes and clasped my palms in prayer. I asked the Lord to please aid me in this difficult situation. It was wrong for me to love a woman and it was against nature. I prayed that He would forgive me for ever having these sinister thoughts and would help me in resisting this demon, this beautiful vixen, seated in front of me.
My eyes opened and my fingers loosened. At once my emerald orbs rested upon the beautiful shoes the demon wore on her perfect, manicured feet. The straps coiled around her thin angles and would its self up her toned bronze legs. Her red dress slit up her thigh, seductively flashing her diamante garters. My eyes passed her voluptuous cleavage and came to rest on her attractive Spanish facial features. Her lips, perfectly full, curled into a flirtatious smile. Her dark rimmed smoky eyes sparkled, as though daring me to approach her.
I looked away and attempted to divert my attention towards the dance floor, where my friends were swaying to the jazzy blues sounds of the band. I was distracted for a split moment as I watched Craig, my ex-boyfriend, trip over a mass of legs and fall. I chucked lightly and did not realise the vixen has seated her sinful self next to my conservative body.
"He's a cute one, isn't he?" she asked, startling me with her rich husky voice. Her scent, a mixture of roses and jasmine, sent my senses into euphoria. I was suddenly conscious of my mainstream Chanel perfume. I did not smell nearly as exotically alluring as she did.
I found my ability to speak, "Yes, Yes he is…" my voice once again trailed into non-existence as I turned to find my eyes locked into her dazzling orbs. She was extremely close, the proximity of our bodies suffocating in a way that I enjoyed. I felt myself drawn towards her, my hands involuntarily reaching towards her waist.
I pulled back, suddenly aware of my angling of my body towards the demon. I tore my eyes from her bare thigh and forced myself to think of the Lord. I was being disobedient towards his teachings and I knew I had to be disciplined.
"Is everything okay, darling?" she whispered, edging even closer towards me, something I didn't think was possible. She placed her hand on my knee, her long red fingers curling over the arch of my knee cap. Her touch was warm.
"Yes," I replied, almost too abruptly. I dared not make any eye contact with the beauty and instead observed Craig attempting to break dance, something which he had been trying for years. He was always unsuccessful.
"I'm Heather," she introduced herself, her eyes still sparking with flirtation, "I haven't seen you here before."
I faced her, but kept my eyes lowered for fear of being entranced by her eyes, "Yes, actually, Craig pulled me along tonight. I'm Nicole." I felt her fingers reach towards my chest and rest on the silver cross which I wore around my neck. My eyes flickered upwards and, regrettably, came in contact with her orbs. I was immediately reminded of melted chocolate.
"That's a beautiful necklace," she said eyeing my face more than the actual pendant, "Is it because of religion or fashion?"
"Religion!" I exclaimed, appalled at the suggestion of wearing a silver cross simply because it looked good.
"Of course, of course," she replied, her beautiful expression becoming sheepish, "I should have guessed. I daresay I have never seen someone dress that conservatively here."
I felt my face heat up, whether it was due to the implied insult or the fact that her body has just brushed against my arm I was unsure, "Is that a problem?"
"Of course not!" her lips curled into a half smile, causing me to experience a melting sensation, "Actually I think it's very distinctive." She leaned towards me, whispering in my ear, "It's very sensual." I could smell the intoxicating perfume bewitch my senses.
What happened next, I could hardly remember. It was as though the whole room disappeared. I suspect there was some form of witch craft attached to her perfume, for I knew of no other reason why I would gaze into her eyes - those beautiful dark eyes that drew me into her emotions – No other reason for me to take her hands – Beautiful thin fingers that entwined within mine.
And last of all, no other reason for me to kiss her so passionately.
Morning guilt allows for the tears of an angel to fall…
I awoke the next morning in a foreign apartment and an unfamiliar bed. I was unsure about what had happened last night, but upon sitting and realising I had remained clothed, I blew a sign of relief. I was still pure.
I turned to one side, taking in the sight of the demonic angel lying beside me, her curls framing her exotic features, making her all the more beautiful. She was an angel for she slept peacefully without a sound, but she was a demon as she was a vicious seductress. Suddenly, the memories of last night flooded into my head - the passionate kisses, embraces and her hands wondering down my body.
I bounded out of the bed, pushing away the white satin sheets. Such luxury for such crime, I wanted to cry, it was appalling. I stepped into her shower, allowing for the hot beams of water to sterilize me.
I prayed that the crime could wash away but I knew it was in vain.
I was startled as the radio seated on the sink flickered into life. It seemed that it was set to start playing at a certain time. I was afraid that I would be rendered victim to sinful music, lyrics that spoke of nothing but sins and unspeakable crimes. I was pleasantly surprised to hear a soft ballad.
As I allowed the burning sensation of the liquid to wash over my immoral body, I closed my eyed and revelled in the honesty and beauty of the lyrics.
For I am not an honest woman,
But someday I know,
That I will be forgiven,
The Lord forgives,
And someday, someday,
All my crimes will fade away…
My eyes were opened, in a metaphorical sense, as I interpreted the music. It was certain that I had committed a crime; I had been disobedient to my religion and I was not true to the teachings of God. Yet I knew that god would forgive me.
But then again, I was unsure about the satanic nature of my deeds.
If it was a sin to be in love with another woman, why must it be acceptable to be in love with someone of an opposite sex? Love is something that is unexplainable and unavoidable.
So if I were to fall in love, I would rather all in love with someone I was attracted to, as opposed to someone whom I liked.
And I was attracted to Heather.
So it's okay because God is an all forgiving being. He understands our desires and I was certain he would not condemn me simply for the reason of loving a human with the same type of genitals.
The condemnation of homosexuality was simply not something god would allow.