What Katie Did

“We loved with a love that was more than love.” That’s was the perfect way to describe what

we had. A kind of love that was more then what meets the eye. Something no one else could see

or understand. A connection of the soul and mind, that grabbed a hold of me and never would let

go.

She was everything to me. Everything about her was perfect in my eyes. The way she walked,

the way she always smelt of lavender, the way she would get this grin on her face that wrinkled

her nose and made her have this certain twinkle in her eye every time she saw me. The way she

whispered in the dark so not to break the peacefulness of the moment. Her name was Katie and

she was the love of my life.

I just lie her at night, imagining she’s with me. I hear her gentle breathing as I watch her

breast rise and fall slowly. I run my hands over her porcelain skin and think about how easy it

would be to do the things I want to do to her. Then I open my eyes and realize where I am. She’s

not here with me. It was just the reality my mind has created in order to cope with the

truthfulness of it all. I have become overwhelmed by my anger and sadness. “Why do I keep

doing this to myself? Matthew, she’s never coming back.” Those words run through my head

like a broken record spinning in a continuous circle. The hardest and most devastating part of it

all, is dealing with the actuality of knowing that is was all my fault. The reason she’s not here

was all because of me. All because of my mistakes; my horrible mistakes.

I worked with Katie in a little hole in the wall coffee shop down on 49th street. She had been

hired only a couple of days after I had been. I would watch her work every morning, busting

tables, cleaning up after everyone else. She should of been doing work like that; not being a

person as beautiful as she was.

We shared the occasional smile and friendly wave to one another, but I could tell she loved

just as much as I loved her. By that little twinkle in her eye she would have every time she

glanced at me. The way her nose wrinkled up when she smiled in my direction. How couldn’t

anyone see the passion we had for each other? How come no one could see that our hearts were

on fire?

I would follow her home after work everyday, just so I could be with her, see her, for just a

few more moments at the very least. I would watch as she walked into her house, set her handbag

on the entry table, and walk directly to the bathroom where she gracefully undressed. She did

these things everyday, all in the same order, looking robotic at times. She then would leave her

clothes on the bathroom floor as she slipped into the running water of the shower. I would watch

intensely, my eyes never leaving her, as every drop of water cascaded down her back onto the

shower floor. I admired her perfectly formed body; the grace and elegance of how her body

moved along.

I easily slipped out of my hiding place unseen and started the short walk home. As I walked

along, my mind would rase with images of Katie: her face, her smile, the way her hips swayed

from side to side as she walked along. I couldn’t believe how perfect she truly was.

Weeks passed and the occasional smile and wave seemed to fade away into nothingness. She

was different. Her walk, her smell, her face. My beautiful Katie seemed distant, like her mind

was somewhere up in the clouds, in a different world. She was thinking of someone and that

someone wasn’t me.

I followed her home like usual, but this time it was different. My hands were wet and clammy.

My stomach was in knots. I know what was happening and the actually was killing me.

I quickly ducked down into my usual hiding place. I peeked through the window, my eyes

searching everywhere for Katie. After a few moments, I found her. My heart stopped as my eyes

fell upon her. Lying there next to here in the bed, was another man.

A flood of emotions overwhelmed me. At that very moment, a hideous demon possessed my

body. The demon of hatred flowed through my veins, attacking me like a deadly cancer. I

couldn’t stand for this. I wouldn’t! She was mine and no one else’s.

I broke through her window, shattering pieces of glass everywhere. I barely noticed the pain

of the glass cutting deep into my skin. The demon didn’t allow me to feel it. My first instinct was

to grab Katie and take her away from this man, but my body told me no to. Instead, I went

straight for the man. The man who touched my Katie.

I wrapped my hands around his neck tightly, so he couldn’t breath. I could hear Katie

begging, screaming at me to stop. I couldn’t. I looked directly into the mans eyes as I saw the

breath of life draining out of him.

“How could you do this to me?” I screamed at him. “She was mine!” Tears started streaming

from my eyes as I watched his body got limb in my hands.

I looked aver at Katie. She was in the corner of the room shivering, crying hysterically from

fear. I quickly looked back at the man. What have I done? I never mint for any of this to happen.

My love was scared of me; this monster I had become.

I looked back over to where Katie had been sitting. She was gone. I looked over my shoulder

and saw her standing there, a long bat in her hands. Before I could do anything, she swung it hard

at my head. Then there was nothing but blackness.

That was three years ago and the last time I saw my beautiful Katie. All I remember is waking

up in this cold jail cell by myself.

Every night I miss her. I wonder if she thinks of me as much as I think of her. I pray for

forgiveness for what I have done and I pray that Katie forgives me too. I forgive her for what she

did and I hope she knows that I do. I love her and I know she loves me. Until the day comes

where I will see her again I lie here, imagining her with me, thinking about what Katie did.