Even the streetlights have lost their glow, my heart
fading into the ominous twilight black and blue with
the feeling that I can't go home.

Like the feeling that this isn't home. I chew my
pencil til there are splinters in my mouth, my tongue
cut to silence and my fingers picking at the stars like
scabs, bleed this ugliness out of me.

Your mind is narrow like your eyes when
you looked at me, turned away from me, this stranger I am,
this misfit and pariah and changeling girl stamped
on my forehead in big red letters that I do not
belong, not here and not

anyplace else. Unwanted like a parasite, like your raw
disappointment but you must chase after me when I run
away, away into the city, lost in the faces
of the Sixteenth Street Mall where I sleep cold on the sidewalk
among the nickels and quarters and one dollar bills thrown on
me by people who pass by and never ask my name.