To My Secret Love, I Won’t Tell You

I can see the way he moves.
I can see his every expression.
I know how he thinks
And what his laugh sounds like.
I’ve seen him when he’s angry
And when he’s broken.
I’ve been up with him all night
And taken him home when he’s too drunk to know where he is.
I watch his lips when they move
And when his eyes shift to me and light up.
I’m glad he’s happy to see me.
And that he always asks my advice,
Even if it kills me inside for just a moment
Before I fake the strength and plaster the smile.
Because when he talks about her,
I feel myself slowly dying.
I feel him sliding further away
From me even if he is happy.
I can tell that we’ll be friends forever
And that he’ll always see me as one of the guys
Even if I am a girl.

I’ll make sure you don’t know
Because it will ruin our lives.
I’ll take on enough hurt to make up for the both of us,
And watch you be happy.
I’ll keep it all to myself and continue on with my life
Even though I will love you forever.

June twenty-seventh, two thousand and eight.