I’m horrible for taking this long to update, I know. But I think as of nowish I’ll be updating a lot more, which is good. So I’m done with this author’s note thing and now you’re gonna read this next chapter, mmkay?

Mmkay.

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an absolute accedence

chapter 09

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I don’t think I like Ace when he’s quiet.

Well, it’s not that I don’t like him, but it’s rather unnerving to see the boy without his mouth moving at somewhere upwards of seventy words a second. Slow days are bad enough; but catching Ace asleep is just dead weird.

Hence my disquiet upon returning to our room—our room…why is that giving me chills?—and finding it completely silent.

My first instinct was to check and make sure Ace wasn’t lying dead in the closet or something; the second was to freak out just a tad. My third instinct, the most overpowering, motivated me to be rational and look around.

Oh, look. Thank you, third instinct, for not making me flip out because my roommate actually liked to sleep once in a while. Instincts one and two can go die in a corner somewhere.

Ace’s dark hair fell in silky waves across his forehead, lips parted just a tad in a crooked, almost devilish smile. He was splayed in a way that wouldn’t cause him pain, long legs bent comfortably, sheets twisted out of his way. His skin was pure toffee cream, soaked in spots of dark purple where bruises were forming but otherwise clear. There were dark red marks on his lips where I could tell he’d bitten them—he had a habit of doing that subconsciously. Not that I was watching, just that I noticed these things. I was observant, not creepy.

I’d also noticed—in a purely innocent manner—that Ace is rather attractive. He had defined, symmetrical features, clear eyes, smooth skin, and a lanky, athletic build that suited him perfectly. Although I think my favorite thing about him is his smile—for some reason it makes me want to smile back and most of the time I just do, when he can’t see it. Which makes me feel ridiculous, because that never happens to me unless it’s Ace. And that makes me think and overanalyze things and…ugh.

Ace is…really, Ace is something else.

I smiled faintly, shutting the door behind me, and crossed the room to my bed. I had to say that I did enjoy the quiet I got when Ace was asleep, no matter how much his silence alarms me. Like right now; it’s nice outside, the room is clean, I don’t feel like moving, and I have something to look at.

Not that that sounds creepy. At all.

Although maybe if this was the only thing that made me creepy I wouldn’t mind so much—

Oh, my God. If I wasn’t positive before, I sure as hell was now.

I am going out of my ever-loving mind, because watching your roommate sleep has got to be the sixth sign of madness. It has to be.

I need help.

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When I awoke there was a glass of water by my bedside, and a piece of paper next to it. I blinked, stretching—

OH MY FUCKING WORD.

Not a good idea, I catalogued mentally, whimpering to myself as I stretched out my non-fucked-up hand to grab the note.

Ace—no shit, that was my name, of course it was for me. Calm down, child.

Since you’re in no shape to do it yourself, I cleaned up your half of the room. I took the liberty of doing your laundry as well, seeing as I was in a good mood. Take your pills and try to get some rest, and I’m officially prohibiting you from leaving the room (this is no joke). In case you’re wondering, I left you a note because I went for a walk. I should be back soon enough, and you haven’t eaten yet today (your stomach attempted to converse with me while you slept) so I’m going to escort you to dinner when I return. I sincerely hope you appreciate this schedule because there will be no deviation.

Addison.

The grin that had stretched my mouth since the opening line was beginning to hurt. It was absolutely adorable, the way he wrote—it was so him, so very Addison.

But something was odd: the line above his signature, something had been scratched out, multiple attempts at words scribbled over. I squinted at it, wondering what it could have been that he’d tried to write, and how I could see what it was.

But unless I went back in time—oh! Wait.

I smiled to myself, and held the paper up to the light gleaming from the ceiling. Thank God for fourth grade tricks.

Okay, let’s see. I squinted at the paper, focusing through the scribbles. I could make out a ‘sin—‘ sincerely, I’m guessing, knowing Addison. But that had been crossed out and following it was an ‘l’…and a..was that an ‘o’? Because if they were together and the only other closing statement I could think of that started with those two letters was “love…”

Okay, okay okay okay. First of all if my heart kept beating like this I was going to have a heart attack so I’d best settle the hell down. Second of all…false hope is bad, Ace, please remember that. Do not get your hopes up. Do not.

Please.

I sighed, trying to bundle all of my excitement into that breath and push it away. I didn’t want to be so worked up over this, because if it turned into nothing it was going to crush me. I had to be realistic sometimes—

…but who in the hell decided that? I could be just as damn optimistic as I wanted to.

But it was sort of hard to be optimistic, locked inside like this. I didn’t look at the door, for fear that temptation would steal me away and I’d go outside; instead, I slid off my bed and went to the window. It was always partially open because both Addison and I liked it open; somewhere between the beginning of the school year and now we’d learned we both liked the sounds of the night. So I slipped my hand under, lifted; the window opened with conditioned ease, and I perched myself on the ledge. I’d never worried about falling off, really; the ledge was wide, I’m guessing as a precaution for stupid boys who liked to be dangerous. Although you’d think the school would put the younger boys in rooms with balconies, if they wanted to prevent injuries; but no, those were reserved for juniors and seniors. Seeing as Addison and I were sophomores, we didn’t get those privileges yet.

But I didn’t mind the ledge, because I could see what I wanted to. Which, right now, was Addison; but I didn’t see him at the moment. Boys crowded the lawn, taking in what was left of the sunshine as it moved towards setting. A soccer ball streaked through the grass; a football flew through the air, shouts coming from every which way. Oh, how I longed to be down there, in my element, running wherever the ball went—

Did I sound lovesick, or what. Je-sus.

Speaking of love…

Involuntarily I focused on one boy crossing the grassy quad and my mind put a name to the figure: Addison Noble, looking graceful as all get out as he wove sleekly through the mess of games. How I’d spotted him I didn’t know myself; but my heart skipped a beat at the idea of what one could call Addison taking me to dinner.

Yeah, I could definitely be optimistic.

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Aww, Ace has got it bad. And I think Addison is coming along too…oh, but we’ll see.

This was for all of you who requested immediate updates. I love that you love this (and hopefully me too!) enough to ask for more, and that really motivates me to write. So thank you all.

Reviews are like jackets to people who are cold very often.