Chapter Three

I awoke to a pair of bright green eyes and a mane of tight black curls- my roommate Kaitlyn, emerged finally from her sexcapades. And she was poking me. Apparently I had fallen asleep on the ratty Craigslist couch waiting for her to be done with the room. I sat up quickly, realizing where I was. I hate that stupid couch- it always smells faintly of beer and urine.

"See ya, Kait," I heard a male voice say. Standing by the door of the suite, reaching for the door handle, was a tall guy wearing gym shorts and a backwards baseball cap.

In my groggy state it took me a second to register who it was. "Gavin?" I mumbled, confused.

"Oh, hey, Chelsea," he acknowledged me with a nod and continued on his way.

I looked back at Kaitlyn. "Gavin?" I said again, incredulously. "Brendan's roommate, Gavin?!"

Kaitlyn shrugged. "Why not?" she said.

"I'm just surprised. I guess that deep down I always thought he was secretly gay. He was always so anal about girls."

"Gavin? Nah. Maybe he was just always holding out for me," she said, smiling sweetly.

"Kait, you're such a bitch!" Adrienne shouted from inside her room, where she was typing something on her laptop.

"I love you too!" Kaitlyn shouted back. To me, she said, "Wouldn't Brendan be a more likely candidate for swinging the other way? I mean, when's the last time you saw him with a girl?"

Hmmm… last weekend, actually, I thought. Not that I would say it out loud. I don't go around advertising my dirty deeds like Kaitlyn does. Adrienne only knows because she was with me at the party that night, made sure I was okay to leave with him, and then texted me later on to make sure I was alright.

Luckily this train of discussion was interrupted by Adrienne coming out of her room and asking us, "You guys want to go to Oscars?"

Realizing I was starving, I said, "Yeah, I'm in."

Kaitlyn shook her head. "Can't. I'm going to a review session for my organic chem final."

"You? Go to a review session?" Kaitlyn was full of surprises today. She usually aces everything, which annoys the shit out of me because most of the time she never makes it to class.

"Seriously, I'm going to fail this one," Kaitlyn stated. That's what she always says before every test though, and she still somehow maintains a 4.0. Did I mention that I don't understand life sometimes?

.x.x.x.

I was standing in line later at Oscars waiting for a wrap when I saw Brendan pulling a bag of chips off of a shelf. Standing next to him was this girl named Karen or Corinne who's I think in one of his psych classes. She was talking to him, smiling in a flirty way. I tried not to think about it. Instead I looked ahead towards the front of the line, telling myself that Brendan had looked more interested in the chips than in Karen/Corinne.

Suddenly I felt a vibration in my pocket. I pulled out my cell phone and saw a myspace-y pic of Kaitlyn pursing her lips on my caller ID. I flipped open the phone and said, "Yo."

"I passed!" she shrieked so loud I had to pull the phone away from my ear.

"What?" I asked once my hearing restored itself. "Passed what?"

"My organic chem final!" she said. "Duh."

I shifted the phone to my other ear and moved up one space in line. "Wait," I said, confused, "I thought you were just going to a review session."

"A review session? I went to like twenty of them. And I know I must have been annoying the past week or so complaining about how I was going to fail. So I just wanted to let you know, I passed!"

"Um," I said. Perhaps instead of a review session she had gone to a party and gotten drunk instead? I'd already had a long day and lacked the energy to contemplate it at the moment.

"Hello? Are you there?" Kaitlyn asked. She sounded slightly hurt. "I kind of thought you'd be really psyched for me."

"Uh, yeah, I am. You always pass everything, though. So I was never really too worried." By then there was only one person in front of me in the wrap line. "Listen, Kaitlyn, I gotta go, but we'll talk about it later, alright?"

"Yeah, we'll celebrate at PnG's tonight. Fifty cent beers on me." We both muttered goodbye and I shook my head, which was really starting to hurt. She knows fifty cent night is on Thursday.

"What do ya want?" the college kid doing workstudy behind the counter asked me. He was wearing an apron and clear plastic gloves and looked like he hated his life.

"Oh, um…" I said. What do I want? "Oh. Honey wheat wrap, grilled chicken, lettuce, tomato…" I continued rattling off ingredients, my eyes wandering back to the chip aisle, but Brendan was already gone.

.x.x.x.

Adrienne and I were watching American Idol later with our suitemates Jane and Michelle when Ryan Seacrest was interrupted by a special news bulletin. "What's this?" Michelle asked, sounding worried. "Another terrorist attack?"

"Or did Lindsay Lohan die in a drunk driving accident?" Jane said. Adrienne threw a pillow at her and said, "Shhh."

A female news anchor with flippy hair and a severe face said gravely, "Breaking news this evening- we've just received word of a commercial airplane crashing into the Atlantic Ocean mere moments ago. We're bringing you live footage of the wreckage…"

She continued as the screen flashed images of a Delta Airlines plane submerged and burning in the water, apparently shot from a news helicopter. The news anchor reported the very little bit of news that was certain at the time: the plane had been headed towards France, almost two hundred people on board, no word yet on any survivors or what the cause of the crash may have been, again, this happened mere moments ago…

Jane and Michelle's eyes were glued to the TV in sick curiousity, so they didn't notice that Adrienne was instead staring at me.

I stood up quickly, needing to get out of the room before Adrienne or I said anything.

"Where are you going?" Michelle asked, still looking at the TV.

"Um. Vending machine. Chips," I mumbled, speeding out the door.

I didn't slow down the brisk pace until I arrived at the vending machine by the main door of the residence hall. It was as I was standing in front of it, surveying its various contents, that I finally let myself breathe again. Every time I exhaled I felt more dizzy, so I slowly leaned forward, pressing my forehead against the cool glass of the machine.

I know I heard that news report about the plane crash hours ago on the radio. I know I did. But how could I have, really, if it didn't even happen until half an hour ago, max? Why had everything been so fucked up ever since I saw that stupid girl kill herself?

"You okay?" Adrienne's voice came from behind me.

I closed my eyes, blocking out blurry visions of Cheetos and Dipsy Doodles. "I'm not sure," I said truthfully.

Adrienne took my hand gently and pulled me away from the machine. She led me into the main lounge, which was thankfully currently empty, and sat me down on one of the couches.

After a few moments of silence, Adrienne couldn't help but ask, "Chelsea… how did you know?"

I looked at her, feeling like I was about to cry. I shook my head, not even attempting to explain. What kind of explanation could there be, anyway?

"Don't tell anyone, okay?" I whispered, pleading.

The expression on Adrienne's face looked scared. She was looking at me as if she didn't even know me. It was probably the best moment of my entire shitty day when she squeezed my hand and whispered back, "I promise."