Racing Towards Nothingness

At long last I sat behind the wheel of the Firebird, an ebony-black car dressed with red-gold flames licking up the sides and hood. Our moment had finally arrived; we had made it into a NASCAR race. Victory was so close that I could almost taste it.

“All right then, Birdie, it’s time to show these other guys what you got!” I patted the dashboard affectionately. The engine roared, responding to my voice and touch. Partners till the end, I thought triumphantly.

They gave the racers the green flag… and we were off!

We flew down the track, the Firebird living up to its name as we accelerated to near-top speed in seconds, no doubt the work of my incredibly talented mechanic and long-time friend Sam. I mentally promised her another hug whether she wanted it or not. All her hours tinkering on the car paid off.

Adrenaline pumped through my veins and I reveled in the sensation, the very thing I loved about racing. We dodged this way and that, passing cars whenever an opening presented itself. I could almost hear the commentary in my head, “Howe passes Cross with a daring move, hugging the wall! This rookie shows great potential! I’m sure he’ll do wonders at the Busch Series if gets the points he needs!”

As we completed several successful circuits, halting at the pit stop to change tires or to fill the gas tank, my crew wished me luck over and over again, boosting my confidence. Since I was managing perfectly, I jokingly told them my lucky streak wasn’t going to run out.

How very mistaken I was.

In the final circuit, everything went horribly wrong. One car in front of mine suddenly swerved, smashing into the one beside it. There was no time for me to react accordingly. Nothing short of an impossible miracle would prevent the crash. I took the only available option and braced myself for the unavoidable impact. Birdie screeched in pain as we collided with the cars and I winced at the noise, a hair-raisingly unpleasant sound similar to nails on a chalkboard.

“Come on, Birdie!” I pleaded, trying to break free of the two cars.

The cars unexpectedly split apart, right before a curve, leaving me going faster than appropriate on a turn. Jerking the wheel reflexively, we slammed into the wall sideways. The front of the car buckled while the back bumper came up, standing us up vertically and making us literally fly for a terrifying few seconds. My stomach plummeted and my heart jerked upwards as we soared forward, leaving me feeling stretched and discomfited. Our momentum carried us along the wall as we spun a full 360 degrees in the air, hitting another car coming down. The Firebird rotated again, tumbling off the top of the car we’d had the unfortunate luck to hit. My jaw was fastened shut as I sat rigidly in my seat, completely helpless. I gripped the steering wheel so tightly my knuckles turned as white as alabaster.

We careened down the track, riding the roof of the car, sparks trailing behind us. Birdie didn’t stop spinning across the course until we hit the edge. The sparks had caught fire while we were in motion and they greedily tried to devour the car as we coasted the last few feet. They soon extinguished themselves, leaving only smoke, as we came to a complete stop on the grass. I breathed a sigh of relief as the temperature dropped from unbearably hot to relatively manageable.

I sat there, slowly unclenching my hands from the steering wheel, head still spinning, heart pounding uncomfortably, and shoulders aching from remaining in a tense position for so long. Mechanically, I unbuckled myself and crawled through the window, collapsing immediately as I attempted to stand upright. My crew quickly surrounded me, the medical team not far off.

“Jasper! Jasper, are you okay?!” Sam knelt next to me, searching my unfocused eyes for a sign of recognition. “I was afraid that we’d only find your corpse!”

“I’ll live, Sam. Don’t worry about me. I’m just a bit dizzy from the effects of vertigo. It’ll pass soon enough. It’s the Firebird I’m worried about.” My words slurred strangely but I smiled winningly up at my teammates and gestured to the still-smoking car behind me. The others chuckled, assuming I was fine since I still put the Firebird’s condition before mine. They slapped my shoulders as they walked past me, headed towards my slightly singed and beat-up, but still beautiful, car. Sam spared a concerned glance at me before following them. I touched the back of my head, remembering how much it stung.

My fingers came back stained with blood.

“What the–,” My sentence was cut off as oblivion overtook me.

I drifted in my own mind, replaying scenes I knew were from before, but I couldn’t quite remember before what. I heard Sam, speaking to me from under the front hood of the Firebird, mock-threatening disembowelment if I didn’t bring back the Firebird unscathed. I recalled excitement I harbored for the race, feeling proud of myself and my team for making it so far. How did the race turn out? Frustration filled me as I struggled to remember.

“Wake up, Jasper!” The distressed plea pulled me from my thoughts, startling me into wakefulness.

I came to in a room so white I couldn’t see anything and an antiseptic smell so strong I wished I could fall back into unawareness to escape it. The events preceding my fainting came back to me, smacking me in the face with merciless abandon. My team had crowded around my bedside, a couple of them crying slightly. I met Sam’s tearful gaze unsteadily, still feeling a little disoriented. Without even giving me a chance to recuperate, she told me the news that shattered the dreams I’d been holding in my heart for eons.

“They said you can’t get back behind a car until your leg heals.” At my look, which I imagined was rather clueless, she continued somberly, hating to be the one delivering me the news. “You broke your leg in that crash. You’re lucky you didn’t die. I’ve seen a crash like that before but the driver didn’t make it.” Sam paused, bottom lip trembling slightly as she visibly tried to hold back tears. She succeeded, for the most part anyway. The rest of my team said nothing, refusing to meet my horrified gaze. How could Fate be so cruel?

“Don’t ever do that again, or I’ll kill you myself!” She yelled. A couple tears escaped her eyes and she quickly fled from my bedside, pushing my other teammates towards me. Their condolences were lost on me as I watched her go, feeling my dreams slip farther and farther away from me.