A/N: So this came to me at night, I swear, I was up at one in the morning typing this, but decided against posting it up. So some of you know I posted up Miranda McCoy before, but then took it down because I had the whole the whole thing all wrong. But now, thanks to my reliable source, I decided to repost it and take another shot at it. This was originally supposed to be chapter 5, but I don't know, putting this on sounded a lot better.

Chapter One

I had to move fast!

I could already see the headlights of the car coming. Thunder ripped through the sky making every nerve in my body jump. I fell down as I swore that the ground shook. The rain pounded hard on me, and I almost wished I had brought a thicker jacket, but I couldn’t think of that at the moment. I heard my radio in the car, but I ignored it, I knew Amber would be pissed off, but my guts were telling me a different story then what she told me.

I hurried to the trunk and pulled out the wires. Running to the bridge with shaking fingers I started to tie up one end of the wire to the bars. But with the thunder, lack of light, and me, cold as hell, it was difficult. My fingers were red and numb. I tied it as hard as possible, and quickly took the other end to the other side of the bridge. Believe it or not, I actually learned this on TV, and thought, what the hell? I looked up through my wet hair as I could almost hear the car’s engine through the mess.

When I had the other end tied up, I stood up looking at me work, “Stay there.” I said to the wire as if it could hear me. I rushed back to the car slipping in the mud on my way. There is never this much rain in Wisconsin, but I wasn’t in Wisconsin anymore, I was in New York City, and things here were so different than what I’ve grown a custom to.

“McCoy, answer Goddammit,” Amber scowled through the radio. I turned it off, hiding it in the glove compartment. I’ll take her bitchness, later. When I sprinted outside, I could already see the car. I rushed back to the bridge and went to work. As clumsily as possible I tried to get on the structure, climbing up, with the gun in my pocket and a flashlight in my mouth. I stood at the edge, and the river below was flowing at almost forty miles an hour. I bent down to the end of the rope, and as fast as possible tried to tie the gun to it.

My mind was all over the place, and I could feel my heart beating faster and faster against my chest. The rain made it impossible to see anything, and not to mention there was no moon out, so I had no light besides my flashlight. I knew that he had something to do with everything going on, and I knew that he would rather die than tell some newbie detective real information. I knew this was a set up, but what he didn’t know was that I was setting him right back.

The car headlights came so close, and I turned around dropping my flashlight as I saw the car slow down in front of me. A beat up Volkswagen; one that looked like it was stolen from some junk yard. I wasn’t prepared, shit.

The door open, and I hung on as I saw heavy black rain boots stepped out. He was tale, I couldn’t judge, so maybe I’d average about 5’8. He had blond messy hair that his spilt ends stuck out like a sore thumb. He was wearing a leather motorcycle jacket, and his jeans were covered in paint, and ripped. I didn’t see his face though, because he walked forward and stepped in front of the car hiding his entire front. I swallowed hard. Every nerve in my body was jumping like crazy. I felt my stomach sink, thankful that I hadn’t eaten anything all day.

“Detective McCoy,” I think he’s the first person who’s ever address me as ‘Detective McCoy,’ instead of just ‘McCoy,’ like that was my first name. I didn’t move, which was not good because my legs were starting to get sore from being crouched on this ledge. “I’m glad you decided to meet me,” I almost caught a Southern accent. “Watcha doing up there?”

I quickly lied, “My earring, it fell into the water, and I was hoping I could save it.” That was pathetic. I saw him walk over to the edge of the bridge and look ever.

“It’s long gone, miss.” He said before he spit into the water.

I cleared my throat trying not to get grossed out, “You said you had some information for me,” I said as clearly and with as much authority as possible. He looked up at me, and smirked. That smirk felt so cold and almost deceiving. Maybe I shouldn’t have come here alone.

I was shivering so much that the coldness cut right through my bones. I hung on to whatever I could feel the slippery edge. He looked at me as if trying to determine what to say – or do – with me. He walked over towards me, his boots making a squeaking sound. He lifted up his hand and at once I reached for my gun. I almost had it, before I saw his hand reach out.

“Why don’t you come down from there? We wouldn’t want you to have an unfortunate accident.” His voice was so icy cold that it hurt more than the coldness of the wind. His eyes were unreadable.

I hung on as if my life depended on it, “Why don’t you tell me what you came to tell me?” I said softly my voice raspy. He turned around from me, shrugging, and I started to come down.

“All I can tell you miss, is that your victim isn’t at all the victim.” He said sourly. “Ellen Beckerman is not the kind of girl to be trusted. Never has been never will be.” He talked as if he had experienced with the teenage prostitute. I was already sitting down on the edge of the structure as he kept speaking, “I have proof that she lied.”

“Th-Then…I-I would need it.” I stuttered. “Y-You are with-withholding evidence. That would be a felony.” I don’t know why I couldn’t form my words correctly. He wasn’t exactly a suspect or else I wouldn’t be asking him question in some old bridge, outside the city. I tried to reach down to get my gun as he spoke, with his back turned it was easier, but at the same time I had to be careful. I didn’t want him to think I was going to kill him.

“I know, Detective McCoy,” His voice had so much acid in it. “But the thing is if I give you what you want, then would I get something in return?” I was taught at the University of Madison-Wisconsin how to make deals with people like this man, but I knew nothing about him, so I had no idea what he wanted.

“We could work something out.” I explained slowly as I leaned back still trying to find the fucking gun. All I felt was cold wet metal, which didn’t help, at all.

“I’m gonna need you to erase some files,”

I chuckled, “I can’t do that…”

“But you will!” He snapped before I could finish. I was taken aback, my heart racing. He looked back at me and grinned, “I’m sorry, was I being too harsh. My momma always taught me how to speak to a lady, and at the moment I’m not speaking to you probably.” Who the fuck is this guy? Some double face psycho?

“I-It’s okay.” I breathed.

What happened next I never even saw coming.

I heard another car coming, and looking at my direction I noticed Amber’s car. I felt the man pull out a gun.

“So you called back up on me!” He demanded.

“No!” I yelled. Shit, why did she have to mess everything up?

He began to shot at me as he hurried to his car, but managed to hit the bridge. I got off, and ran after him as he slipped by the driver’s side, and with rain in my eyes I forced my way towards him, as I heard Amber coming out of her car yelling, “McCoy,” I tried to jump on top of the man to stop him, but he flung me off and I hit my back against the bridge, as someone fired. I was in a daze as I tried to get back up, hearing him close his car door; I wouldn’t let him leave. I hurried up trying to stop him, but he wasn’t in the car!

I felt arms around my waste and was thrown in the air as I heard Amber trying to call for backup and firing at the guy. There was a burning sensation on my shoulders, as I felt myself making contact with the bridge again, face first. I lifted my hands trying to block it, and heard a crack. Either it was my arm or my rips that were cracked because something hurt, but I was too confused to figure out what.

Amber came forward holding the gun at range and looking at him with furious eyes. “Drop her!” She demanded. Wrong choice of words.

I could feel him grin as he looked at her, “As you wish,” And before I knew it there was another gun fire and I was flying towards the bridge again but this time I missed it and fell over it towards the water, just as lightening came in contact with the wire shocking Amber right out of the bridge, and shocking the guy. I was in the water before I knew it. Water was rushing into my longs as I tried to kick my way up, but the current was too strong. I heard another sound of thunder and could almost see the lightening hitting the wire once again, this time burning the wood of the bridge, and as I looked up I couldn’t even scream. The impact was so strong and I felt the electricity run through my veins so fast and I felt the pressure of what was the bridge pushing harder and harder down.

I knew that becoming a detective would mean putting my life on the line. I just didn’t know that it was going to have to end this way. I thought of this, as the lights went down.

.x.x.x.

Darkness. That was all I saw. That was all I felt. It felt so cold and lonely, but I felt so warm. I walked forward and the moment I started moving my life began to play out in the sides. Every little mistake, every second, every minute, things I wish I could forget, every regret, and then the things that were forgotten. I couldn’t hear a thing as I walked, I could speak, I didn’t even see anything. I just walked forward to that light that everyone spoke of. I didn’t believe that when you died you’d go to heaven, I never even believed in hell, which was why I was never afraid to lie. But I walked so slowly, because even though it felt so warm and looked so beautiful, I was afraid of it. My life was just starting; it couldn’t end, not yet. And just as quickly as it all came, it was gone.

I looked around as I was in a white hallway, it was empty, the silence was so loud. It wasn’t until I saw people, doctors and nurses, racing through the halls that I saw who they were taking. Me. Was I dead? Could someone survive being struck by lightning, getting shot, and having a bridge fall on top of them under water in five seconds flat? Probably not.

I tried to walk towards them but the closer I got, the farther away they got from me.

“No!” My voice echoed through the halls like a whisper instead of a yell, “I’m not dead!” I cried out, but again it sounded like the wind just passing by. I ran as fast as I could, but it felt like I couldn’t move, it felt like everything around me was moving slowly or not moving at all. I wanted to break down and cry, but I couldn’t feel a tear come. All I felt was hurt from the thought that this could be it. Just as I reached the ER doors I went through and soon I was falling. Was this God’s way in telling me that there was no place for me in heaven? I had my arms spread out as I fell into warmth. Maybe I was going to hell after all. Maybe becoming a detective could never justify killing someone, though I never shot a person once; not even as a street cop.

My eyes were wide open as I felt myself shiver. I fell and I didn’t care how long it would take – I could fall forever, because here I felt nothing. Every stress, every memory, everything around me was gone, and I liked it. I kept falling into nothingness. I lived my life as good as possible, though in a way I do have unfinished business; with my old life that I decided to leave behind because I couldn’t face the truth, because I couldn’t face facts. I closed my eyes before I felt myself in water.

I couldn’t breathe. I swam there trying to find my way up, but it was like I was changed to ocean. It was so clear, and I could see all the fishes around me. They ignored me as if I wasn’t there. Though I couldn’t breathe, I wasn’t pay attention to any of that, surprisingly. All I could think was that there so much I missed in my living years. I looked up seeing nothing but a white light. I tried to go up, but I couldn’t. Something was holding me back. My throat felt like it was swelling up, and my lungs were tortured. I tried harder and harder to push myself up but I couldn’t do. But I wasn’t going to stop.

I pushed harder the memories – the good memories – came to my mind. I had a new job that I loved so much that I didn’t care if it would put me in danger, I made a promise, and I was going to stick to it. My mother. I loved my mother so much; I couldn’t leave her all alone. I was all I had in her life. She took care of me, raised me well, and I wanted – I needed – to return the favor, even though I don’t believe running away did any good for me. I pushed myself up harder as I thought of Amber’s mocking words. She thought I couldn’t make it as a big city cop, but I wanted to prove her wrong. I wanted to make sure she knew that I could make it.

Before I knew it I felt my body slowly go up. I thought of everything I went through, and if I could survive all of that, then I could survive this too. I could make it! I needed to make it! I had things unresolved, and they needed to be resolved – eventually. But I kicked harder and harder until finally I broke through the surface of the water.

.x.x.x.

The bright light hurt my eyes, the bright lights that I saw from under the water. It took me a moment to feel coldness and warmth at the same time. And from a distance I could hear, “Holy Mary mother of Jesus Christ!” It sounded stunned. I closed my eyes into the darkness once again. Here I could breathe. Here it was okay. I tried to take a deep breath, and my lungs hurt, they were on fire. I coughed, and my throat felt raw and sore. It hurt so much, I wanted the pain to go away; I just wish I could rip my lungs right out.

I felt myself move over and before I knew it something solid and cold hit me. I was shaking as I put my hands down flat, and daring myself to open my eyes. Watering, I looked; everything was a blur at first. My heart was beating twice the speed, and something on my chest hurt. I put my hand over it, and just as fast as the sting came, it was gone. It took me a while to process where I was.

I was on the floor. I put my hands flat on the surface as I pushed myself up. I looked around seeing two men looking at me as if they saw the devil himself appear. I felt my legs burn. I almost cried out as I crashed back on the floor I tried to hold on to my legs, they were in pain as I felt something inside move. Was it my bones? I don’t know, but whatever it was it sent tears to my eyes as I felt my legs being cut up like ribbons. My abdomen came next I held on to it as I felt a burning sensation as well. I was too scared to cry out. Tears spilled out of me as my body began to betray me and hurt me. My arms felt like jell-o and it felt like I was being hit by a hammer as my arms shook, and I could almost see the bones inside me place themselves in the correct place. As fast as the pain came, it was over.

I was breathing hard as I starred at the burning lights in the ceiling. My heart was slowing down, and my lungs and throat felt dry. I put a hand over my heart and turned my head around to look at the men.

“W-What happened?” My raspy voice asked, “W-w-where am I-I?” I looked at them and they looked at me before looking at each other their eyes wide open.

The oldest one, who had a scalpel in his hand, dropped it, blood on the tip of it. “Y-y-yo…” He was having just as hard of a time as talking as I was. “Y-you’re at the morgue” He said and I couldn’t breathe. “We were just about to perform an autopsy on you before…before…you came back to life?” He said it as if a question, as if he couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it. Soon, I found myself surrounded by darkness again.

.x.x.x.

Every cell in my body was hurting me so badly. I felt the room spin around me as I tried to gather myself together, but it hurt so much. It felt like someone was slowly tearing me apart from the inside out. My body shook as I bent over coughing. I was almost expecting blood. My legs, which were once the strongest body part I had, felt weak, like someone was stomping on them. I couldn’t take it anymore. I screamed at the top of my lungs, hurting my insides and throat.

I felt invisible hands push me down to the ground as I fought my way back up, and the room kept spinning and spinning. I wanted to get up. I wanted to tear my skin away from my body. The strength to push away the invisible forces wasn’t there, I felt like I was pushing air away.

Hot tears came when I held my arms to my body, and screamed feeling my spine break. I couldn’t move or do anything as the pain in my back traveled slowly and painfully down my body. The blood was rushing to my head making me dizzy and nauseated as I felt my body rip apart. I screamed with all the force I had when the greatest pain of all came.

I was on fire! I tried to yell. There was fire on me. I shook myself as I tried to catch the fire on my skin. Help me! I’m on fire! I thought hard as I tried to say this as loud as possible, but my throat burned so badly. I tried to run away from it, but my legs wouldn’t move. I felt weak, and exhausted. But I was burning up. Something was inside of me burning me alive and no one was doing a damn thing about it! I cried harder and louder as I scratched needing to get the fire out of my system before something in the back of my head ended it all.

.x.x.x.

Was I dead? There was nothing but darkness again, but was I dead? Was it all a dream? I couldn’t feel my body. Maybe this was what death felt like. It felt like complete nothingness. But I felt myself breathe. Maybe I was alive. What if I was in some sort of coma like state? Would I know if I’m in a coma? I wanted to shiver. The dream, the dream that haunted me so much, felt so real. I could almost feel my body exhausted from all the hurting I felt.

There was a sound I heard. A heart beat. Was it mine? Was someone in this darkness with me? I breathed in, and I felt my lungs breathing in clean air. But I almost thought that water was rushing into my lungs instead of air. Then a horrid image came to me. Being trapped in water, not being able to leave; everything was cold, dark, and suffocating.

“Miranda…” A voice said from a distance. I looked around but there was nothing but blackness, I was a lone, so where did the voice come from. It called out again, “Miranda?” I wanted to hug myself by my arms couldn’t move, they were too tired. Could the dead get tired? Could they get scared? Could they feel? “Miranda,” I looked up as I saw a light rip through the darkness. It hurt my eyes as the rip got bigger and bigger.

It was all blurry, and so, so bright. I sucked in a breath of fresh air as I saw a man looking down at me with a worried expression. “Miranda, are you awake?” I closed my eyes again not wanting to leave the darkness, but there was some sort of relief in seeing the light of day again. I looked up at the man who starred at me. He was white, and was wearing a white doctors coat, with something in his hand.

“W-W-where am I?” My voice was raspy, and it hurt to talk. My throat hurt I realized. It hurt badly, like the fire that was in it before never went away.

There was a sigh, “You’re at Mercy Hospital,” His voice was husky as I closed my eyes again. “Miranda, do you know what happened?” I tried to think back but I couldn’t see anything. I shook my head, my neck ached a bit. “What is the last thing you remember?” He asked. I opened my mouth feeling it dry and rough.

“I-I-I was…in a room?” It was difficult to talk as it was difficult to breathe. I said it all as slowly as possible. “N-n-no…I-I-I…w-wasn’t in…a room…I was…on-on-on…a…bridge?” Images came flashing through my mind. Thunder roared in the background, rain hit me hard, it felt like hail, there was a man, but I couldn’t see his face, just his shadow. “T-there’s a gunshot.” I spoke faster and louder as my shoulder began to ache. “T-then water…lots and lots of water…” I had my eyes closed as I tried to think as hard as possible. I felt my fingers clutch on to something and realized it was bed sheets. “And…there…there was…a burn. I-I’m burning.” I wanted to stop, but I couldn’t. “And-and it hurts.” Tears came out of my eyes again.

“Its okay, Miranda.” The voice said as softly as possible. “Seems you remember a fairly large amount,” I opened my eyes to look at him. They were adjusting to the light, so they didn’t hurt as much, and it wasn’t as blurry. I saw a clear view of him. He had blond hair, golden blond; he had strong-cheek bones, and strong hands. His footsteps were heavy as he came around me. “Would you like me to tell you what happened?”

I nodded my head, as I licked my dry, chapped lips. I closed my eyes as I tried to breathe as calmly as possible. He sat beside me; I knew this because his breath became deeper, and louder.

“Well Detective McCoy, you were going to meet a suspect at Trinity Bridge, one of the oldest bridges in all of New York. Your partner was following you. Things seemed to go out of hand, and he threw you into the river. It was raining and there was a thunderstorm. Lightening hit the bridge, burning the wood, and soon it fell off…” There was a long pause and I peeked to see what he was waiting for. Some of it sounded familiar. “The bridge fell, and landed on top of you, and you were struck with lightening. Your partner was out cold, from the lightening, so it took her a while before calling back up. By that time you would have been two miles away from the scene if the bridge hadn’t kept you where you fell. Every single bone in your body was broken. You were bleeding everywhere. There was not a single breath left in you. You were sent straight to the morgue, where you kept for forty-eight hours as they tried to search for your family, and just as they were about to perform autopsy you awoke.”

I looked at him my eyes opening wide, “A-are you trying to tell me I came back from…from the dead?” I couldn’t believe that. I could believe the part of the bridge, but that I died? No, no. Then if I’m dead, what am I doing here now? Awake?

He looked at me sadly, before saying in a voice that was less than a whisper, “Yes.” I looked down as I starred at my body. “You passed out, and soon you were screaming in pain, and just as fast as it started it ended. The M.E.’s had to call us in, demanding why their dead body wasn’t dead. Paramedics brought you here, and adrenaline must have been pumping through your body because you were screaming, kicking, and scratching at yourself.” I looked at my arms as I saw them bandaged up; both of them looked bad though. “You were screaming about fire, and once it was over we examined you.” He stopped and sighed.

I looked at him. “Keep going,” I demanded slowly.

“Your body was badly damaged, I mean, your rip bones punctured your lungs, others punctured different organs; you were beyond dead. And by the time we had you stabled, your body was in perfect condition. Your heart was beating regularly, we took blood samples, they seemed as normal as possible. It was as if you weren’t in any accident at all. Everything was perfectly normal. And we don’t understand how that happened.”

I shook my head in disbelief, “No, no, no. That’s impossible.” I said in a low voice. “That is impossible. No one can come back from the dead. I was dead, how can I be here now?” So many questions were racing through my head.

The doctor put his hand on my bandaged arm, “We don’t understand how it’s impossible either. I mean, we were just thankful that you weren’t beyond recognition. But how you were able to put yourself back together is beyond us.”

“All of this is beyond me.” I said loudly. “Oh my god, how long has it been?” I looked at him feeling my heart sink.

He sighed, “Tomorrow will make it exactly two weeks.”

“I’ve been dead two weeks?” I breathed.

“No, you were dead two days; you were unconscious for two weeks.” He corrected me.

“Oh my god, my job, my suspect,” I thought out loud.

“Actually, Detective Macy is on his way there now, to bring you what you need. He’s taken responsibility for your well-being. He says that since you have no family here, he wouldn’t mind taking you until you feel better.”

“Macy?” I breathed. I thought back to Detective Macy, he looks at me like I’m the greatest mistake in the world. That he would rather die than hire someone like me. Taking my numb body, I pulled my legs up, and turned my back on the doctor. All of this was just too weird for me. I wanted to think back to the time when I first came to this city hoping for change; not for madness. But all I could see was blackness.

I cried slowly as I felt my heart beat.

A changed heart.