Prologue

We were just fifteen. Inexperienced and unknowing about the world around us as we sat there, looking at each other trying to figure out what to do. It wasn’t long until your hand reached out, tentatively, and landed upon mine. We took it slow. First it was the hands; we explored them by clasping them together in several different ways then placing them to our lips and placing kisses upon each tip. You then moved to my arms, just stroking them up and down until you pulled me close.

I thought my heart had stopped beating. I felt your body heat as you brought me close, almost flush against you, and that was all it took for me to stop worrying, stop thinking about everything and anything. I decided to just go with it, let the world deal with itself for awhile while I was in your arms.

Soon your face drew close to mine, and I felt your warm breath puffing against my lips.

“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” you said to me.

“I wouldn’t have let it get this far if I didn’t want it,” I replied.

Then our lips touched. I believe I understood what people meant when they said they had found heaven or bliss while they were with the one they loved. It was everything I had always wanted and nothing I had ever imagined a kiss to be. I tentatively placed one hand and then the other upon your arms, allowing myself to lean just a little bit more.

I felt it then; you smiled against my lips which caused me to smile in turn. It was such a happy feeling that swelled within my chest and I knew that everything would go fine. You placed one hand behind my neck and the other at my waist, which cause me to tense slightly, but it was too wonderful a feeling to stay tense for long.

Your hand upon the back of my neck began to urge me to move my head, causing you to deepen the kiss and me to make a noise I had never made before but what I knew was a moan. I felt so embarrassed and could feel my face flushing, knowing I had turned as red as the shirt that I was currently wearing, but you didn’t seem to care. You just smirked against my lips before flicking your tongue out and tracing my lips.

It took me a while before I realized what it was that you wanted, I had always been slow on just about everything. I shyly opened my lips and once they opened you just slid right on in, causing me to shiver slightly at the new sensation. It wasn’t anything bad but it was different. I felt you exploring my mouth before I decided to do anything in return. I think I heard you chuckle when I began to move my own tongue, but I’m not sure.

Then I felt my shirt rising slightly as your hand slid under it. It was so strange, to have your tongue in my mouth and your hand up my shirt. What made it all seem so strange was the fact that we had both finally decided to move our relationship up to a more physical level, and it seemed that even though it should be too much physical contact that we were making, it all just felt right.

You hand slid up my chest and I was afraid that my heart might beat right out of my chest or that you would feel it and not want to continue, but you never stopped. Your hand caressed my chest before it gently skimmed over one of my nipples, causing me to gasp and you to do it again. Then you took that same nipple and rolled it around between your fingers and squeezed. This time I moaned.

You pulled back slightly and I realized that we were both panting hard, our chests rising and falling rapidly and almost at the same tempo. You smiled at me as your hand continued to massage my chest and switch between nipples, alternately rolling and pinching them. My eyes closed as I tilted my head back and let out a breathy moan which made you gasp and lean in to kiss me again. It was quick this time as you pulled back, taking your hand out from under my shirt.

I looked at you with pleading eyes, begging to have your hand back on my chest, your lips upon my own, or anything. I just needed you to touch me. You smiled softly at me as you caressed my cheek and placed a feather light kiss upon the tip of my nose.

“Are you sure you want to continue, cause I don’t want to do anything that you might regret later.” You said with a serious look on your face while you continued to caress my cheek lovingly.

I was so taken aback that I could do no more than nod my head dumbfounded, and to prove that I was serious I leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss upon your lips. Your smile made me blink, and I thought that the sun would never look the same, that it would seem pale whenever I should think of your smile.

“Take off your shirt.” You said as you removed your own.

In awe, I reached out my hand traced the line between your abs. I had always been envious of the six pack you had, especially since yours were so well defined compared to all the other boys in our school. You picked up my hand and placed it on my shirt, raising an eyebrow to remind me of what I was supposed to be doing. Blushing at getting distracted by your chest I quickly removed my shirt and tossed it somewhere on the floor.

You leaned back against my headboard and motioned for me to straddle you, which I quickly did. I blushed when I sat on your lap, for the evidence of your arousal was very prominent against my butt. Feeling embarrassed I squirmed in your lap but stopped once I heard you moan and you placed your hands on my hips, giving me a look that said you wouldn’t be held responsible for what happened next if I didn’t stop.

I decided that I might as well tease you a bit and moved my but against your lap again. You growled at me, to which I laughed at, not seeing the twinkle in your eyes. Before I knew it you had grabbed me firmly by the hips and rolled us over so that I was now laying flat on the bed and you were leaning over me with a devil’s smirk dance across your lips.

I smiled up at you and took my hands, bringing them around your neck and pulling you close to me so that we could kiss. It felt so nice to have your bare chest pressed against mine and to feel your heartbeat which seemed to be just as wild as my own. As we kissed one of your hands found its way back to my chest and began to play with my nipples.

It didn’t take long for me to be moaning and writhing beneath you. You pulled away from my mouth and looked at me. You leaned down quickly to swipe your tongue against my lips before I watched as your head began to move toward my neck. You spent a minute there, and I knew that you were giving me a hicky. That you were marking me so that everyone else would know that I was claimed.

I didn’t know what to do as I laid there panting and you began to move your lips down my neck to my collarbone, marking me again. When your mouth engulfed one of my nipples I thought I might cum right then and there, but I didn’t. I didn’t want this to be over too soon.

Somehow my hands found their way up your back and into your hair, pulling your head closer to my chest, making sure that you wouldn’t leave. Since we were so caught up in what we were doing neither of us heard the engine cut off outside in front of the house. Neither of us heard the door downstairs open or the footsteps on the stairs. It wasn’t until the door was flung open that we realized we were in trouble.

I hoped that the person I would see in the doorway would be my mother, but I was not so lucky. The shocked face that was looking at us was my father. Icy cold terror set into my stomach as I saw his face morph from being in shock to one of rage. I saw the tall frame in the door stiffen and then take a step forward.

My body moved on its own. I threw you off of me and stood up, hoping that I could distract my father enough to give you time to run, but running wasn’t something that you could do. You got up quickly and jumped in front of me just as the arm that my father had lifted came swinging down to deliver a sound slap. When the crack rent through the air I thought my heart had stopped beating and that the world had gone silent. It only lasted a minute, since the next thing I saw was hell breaking lose.

That is all I remember besides waking up in a hospital bed with my mother asleep in the chair next to me with my five year old sister asleep on her lap. It looked like both of them had been crying and my heart constricted. I then remembered you and tried to move, only to find that I couldn’t and that everything hurt. I must have made a sound that woke up my sister, for she quickly shook my mother awake and almost all thoughts of you flew from my head when I saw her red eyes.

Gulping down air that seemed to burn I asked the only question that mattered to me, “Where is he?”

She looked at me with such sad eyes and I feared that the worst had happened, that my father had managed to kill you. She looked at my younger sister and asked her if she could go see if there was a nurse in the hallway. My sister nodded her head and walked out of the room.

“He’s in the ICU, but they believe that he is going to live. It won’t be certain until tomorrow, but…” she trailed off as if looking for the words that just wouldn’t come. Sighing, she looked at me with eyes that I prayed I would never see again before she looked away and said, “Your father’s in jail. It was lucky that I got there when I did, for if I hadn’t I don’t know what would have happened to either of you. He said that he won’t leave with you and I told him that I wouldn’t live with him. He agreed. I’m meeting with the lawyer to go over all the paperwork.”

I could tell that there was more to come as she paused. I also knew that whatever she said was going to be bad, very bad.

“After all my meeting with the lawyer I will be going back to the house and packing everything. Your Uncle Dan who owns the moving company will help me pack everything and then we’re moving in with your Aunt Anne. Your sister and I will be staying at a local hotel until you are released from the hospital. You know, she’s been in need of some help every since her husband died and she‘s been kind enough to offer us a place. I think it’ll be good for all of us to get a fresh start.”

I just stared at her in shock. The school year would be ending soon which would make it seem strange to suddenly transfer into another school. This wasn’t what made me stare at her though; it was the fact that I would have to leave you. It wasn’t like my aunt lived near here either, she lived in another state. It was at least an eight hour drive from here to there and neither of us had our license yet.

“Shawn?” My mother said a bit worriedly. She reached out a hand and placed it on my own, but I didn’t care. They were separating us and we hadn’t even done anything wrong. As much as my body hurt it was nothing as I felt my heart breaking and falling apart.

“Shawn?” Said a worried voice next to my bed that I knew was my sisters.

Not even looking at her, I patted a spot next to me on the bed and felt the warmth of my mother’s hand leave mine as she went to lift my sister onto the bed next to me. She curled up next to me, being really careful whenever she touched me. It seemed that she was afraid I might break, and I was tempted to tell her that I couldn’t break any more than I already had, but the words wouldn’t come out. My throat felt constricted, as if a hand were holding it in a vice like grip, slowly cutting off my air supply.

I flinched when I felt the small hand brush my cheek and realized that my sister had been wiping the tears off my face. When had I stared crying? I looked down at her and saw that she was a blur through my tears. I lifted up my arm even though it hurt and wrapped it around her. I drew her close to my side and just held her there as I cried silently.

“I’m sorry.” Her little voice said.

“Why?” I asked as I wiped the tears off of my face and some of the snot that had slid from my nose.

“I couldn’t find a nurse and you’re hurt.” She said looking at me with her large innocent blue eyes.

“It’s alright.” I said with a slight chuckle as I snuggled against her. “Having you here makes me feel better than any nurse ever could.”

She smiled at me with such an innocent and trusting smile. I felt my tears begin to fall anew, but I didn’t let her see. I heard my mother’s footsteps as she left the room. To do what, I’m not sure, but I have a feeling it was so my sister wouldn’t see her cry. I heard the soft inhale and exhale of my sister’s breath and began to feel myself lulled to sleep. The last thought that I had before I feel asleep that night was of you, Roy.