golden gate

Future Plans

When people generally ask me what I want to do with the rest of my life, I usually answer that I want to become a con artist and sell the Golden Gate Bridge for a living. It's not necessarily the truth but it certainly stops them from asking twice. For some reason or another, they seem to remember that response better than say, “Oh, I want to be a doctor,” or, “I want to write.”

By saying ‘not necessarily the truth' what I mean is that although I can't guarantee what I would choose if the choice were open to me, I'm pretty sure that selling the Golden Gate to gullible tourists wouldn't be at the top of my list. It might be on there simply because I like challenges, but a major stumbling point would be in regards to certain issues like legality and ethics. Fooling people loses some of its charm after the FBI knocks down your door and hauls you off to prison. Therefore, I'm pretty sure that as wide open as my future is, being a con artist will probably never enter in.

So realistically, what do I have planned? I did after all rule out selling bridges and other like-minded occupations...but that only leaves about a million other things I can do. Well, I plan to finish college for starters. Then, I really want to work for NASA. If I can, I want to spend the rest of my as-of-yet-undetermined career working towards better shuttle designs and terraforming Mars. Maybe somewhere along the line I'll be able to convince somebody to allow me into space. With luck, I'll be able to spend my years working to make science fiction a reality.

And when it's all done, I'll retire to the quiet life. Am I planning on ending up in a Florida retirement home where I can play golf all day? Not a chance. First, I'm going to sell everything. I'll use the profits to buy a Harley, which I'll drive to San Francisco. And then I'm going to spend the remainder of my life trying to sell the Golden Gate Bridge to suckers.