i really do plan on finding that man
and slaughtering him
whole and raw as he wretches his guts onto the steering wheel
the aura of guilt erecting his inner hatred towards the man he could have been, and the man he always wanted to be
invoked by the circumstantial evidence of dysfunction
the guitar strumming and skimming his skin as the cut throat dances across his flesh
piano wire slicing into my palms as i wind it around his neck
spinning and spinning him into the silhouette of death

and I will prevail.
With the interrogation of stranger speak
where i embody the greater power of Hercules and Democritus
substantial in my philosophy of why and why and why and why and maybe even why not
why not take my bare hands and tighten them ever so vehemently around his breathless throat
thou shall not kill but-
thou shall if thou feels entitled to
and i have gained this title, this headline of murderous raging queen of the thunderous dome hood of a letter

etched into my skin
the maps
the plans
articulation and time spent reorganizing my life to fit the "code"

never get caught
and leave him begging

I know my anger is worked way too strongly into itself
but I have a right
and if your father wants to join me then throw him some duck tape
lets get this fucker
he can call "knife" into stead of "shot gun"
because bitch these daggers will be flying
in an abandoned house on the edge of town

here he
here he
screaming and begging for salvation
making his skin my canvas
skinning him alive
spitting in his face and cutting off his toes
castrating his dignity into the very moments leading up to his thirsty begging mindless exit from this earth
tainted by the shadows of my blood covered body

raging with the demons that float deep within me
there will be no rest until its done

to think that took me this long to see who I really am
the devil riddled into my veins and DNA
DEVIL NO ABANDON?

I am
ruthless in my hunger for taking his life
and destructive in my excruciating ways of fulfilling my duty as a
person
friend
and horror
the resounding waves of the effortless motions of slicing and bashing
the silence after the kill
the most deafening sound
and the most deserved

let my aching hands run deep into my soaked pockets as i let the mess clean itself
(his corpse reeking and leaking through the cracks of the ruined walls)
let this be my release
let this be my way into the life I have seen depicted on TV screens and in Magazines
let me rhyme again
and let my drunken spirits be the blame

let me-
let me-
forget.