Population: Old People and Trees

Kerrin stared with deep loathing out the car window. Could this place have any less appeal? This town had nothing but hicks, trees, and broken down gas stations. Who the hell would live here? Her eyes lethargically swiveled to the driver’s seat. Who? Of course it was her father, who was the most uninteresting person in the entire world. And what else could be wrong? He was a cop. This place was going to be the fiery infernos of hell, just with more rain and temperatures ranging from unpleasant to unpleasant. Well look on the bright side she thought, at least her father didn’t like to talk.

She slid further down into her seat. Damn her mother. How dare she find a new husband! Did her mother realize that Kerrin did not want to wake up every morning to see some forty-year-old baseball superstar wannabe stepping out of the shower in nothing but a towel with his hairy chest displayed for the whole world to burn their eyes on? And worst of all, Kerrin could not handle those puppy dog eyes on mother’s face every time she saw her new husband leave for a road trip and she realized she could leave with him because of her daughter. For months Kerrin had felt the horrible guilt hanging around her neck like a thousand pound weight. So finally she packed her bags and left for the frigid wasteland her father lived in. Her mother barely gave up a fight, and Kerrin was left with nothing but resentment towards her mother’s abandonment. Maybe she should have stayed and tortured her mother some more? She sighed. There was no way she could win.

Her father turned into the driveway of a rather worn down house, and Kerrin found her eyes studying the house like she would a dissection frog in biology class. This was it? Oh hell, whom was she kidding? She expected this, this two-story house with its diseased green peeling paint and tattered siding. If her father was one thing, it definitely was not a decorator or stylist. This house reminded her of a poorly done kiddy-haunted house. Perhaps it would have ghosts? Or maybe the girl from that movie . . . what was it, something with a grudge? Oh whatever, maybe that creepy girl would come crawling down the stairs and eat her brains out? That would definitely be interesting. She almost smiled to herself.

“Are you coming, kiddo?” Her father stared blankly at her from outside the cop car. Yes, she had been paraded through the town in a cop car. Now she would be forever known as the policeman’s daughter. Boys would just love that. She pried the door open slowly and slammed it shut once she had eased out of the monstrosity. And had he just called her kiddo? Was she twelve now?

She noticed her father had already grabbed her two bags. She had not needed much. She was never one for “stuff”. All she needed were a few outfits, some books, and CDs and she was set. She marched over to her father and plastered a grin on her face. Just smile, she thought.

“You’ll like this place,” her father rambled as he headed up the stairs. Oh really?

She nodded with a plastic smile on her face. If there was an award for best Barbie smile, well she just might have won. “Sounds like it. There’s nothing like rustic woods and old people.”

Her father gave her a sharp look, but entered the house without a single comment until he reached the bottom of the staircase. “I’m glad you’re here though. Even under these circumstances. I’ve missed you, Kerrin.”

This did bring a genuine smile to Kerrin’s face. Her father was a decent person when he tried. “Yea, I missed you too, Lu–I mean dad.” She had almost called him by his first name, Luke. This was going to take some time getting used to. Dad, dad, dad, she rolled the word off her tongue in her head until it stuck better in her brain.

He beamed a cheeky grin and clomped up the stairs. Kerrin almost didn’t want to follow because the stair’s moaning creaks reminded her that her father was not the best carpenter either. What if the stairs collapsed? At least she wouldn’t be miserable anymore. Always look at the bright side, she thought. Her eyes flickered to look out one of the dusty windows. She was going to have to work hard at finding a bright side when the sun never made an appearance here. She was going to miss California.

“This is your room. Do you remember?” Her father cracked open a door and the depressing gloom poured over her. Well, she certainly remembered it, but she remembered it without the overly pink blankets coveting the bed and lacey curtains dangling from obviously dusted windows. What had happened? She only recognized her old stuffed animals and bookshelf. She definitely did not remember ugly girly blankets and curtains!

“Um, yea sort of.” Kerrin gulped.

“Well, I went shopping and I remembered you liked pink. These were the matching curtains, so I thought you might like it.” Her father looked uncertainly at her for approval.

All she could do was twitch up the corner of her lip into a half-smile. “Oh, its great.” Great for when she was a little girl who still liked my little ponies!

Her father smirked and seemed to be thoroughly proud of himself as his chest puffed out. “Well then, I’ll just leave you to your packing then.” And he left. He left just like that and silence draped over her.

Great, she was stuck in a Pepto-Bismol induced coma for the next year. This was just getting peachier and peachier. She laughed out loud. It was just getting peachier and peachier. Peaches were pink! She rested her head against the doorframe and almost could not stop her laughs. At least they kept her tears at bay.

An hour later she slumped down the stairs to find her father watching television in the dimly lit living room. He didn’t look up as she entered the room. “Um, I’m done packing.” She said, standing awkwardly under the archway between the living room and the foyer. It took her father a minute and twenty-six seconds to look up. She counted.

“Oh, hey there.” There was a pause and they stared uncomfortably at each other for a minute before a look of “oh crap, I forgot” passed over her father’s face. Did a light bulb turn on? “I forgot!” She was right. Score one for her. Her father jumped up and Kerrin stepped back as he torpedoed toward the front door. “Follow me.”

“What is it?” Kerrin queried as they bounced back down the stairs. The world needed to figure out how to make teleport machines. These stairs were getting annoying.

“I figured that you would hate to be taken to school by your old dad, so I got you something.”

Her brain moved instantly to new car and her excitement flared through her. Perhaps he did something right! Yet she might have thought too soon. As they turned the corner of the house, she saw the run down garage and tiny tarp swathed limply over something the size of an overly large jungle cat. Did her dad get her a clown car? Oh she would be livid.

Her father stopped just the side of the brown tarp and beamed from ear to ear. “It’s a little late, but happy birthday.” And he whipped off the tarp with as much flair as a magician revealing a trick and her bottom lip plummeted open.

It was a . . . a . . . a bike? Her brain fried. A bike? She just gaped at it in astounded horror. A BIKE?! Not only a bike, but a bike from the Jurassic period at the earliest. Did a Velociraptor ride this thing at one time? It was a dirty black color with wheels too small for the frame and–was that a hand basket on the front! Oh God! She would be humiliated. All she need was a bell to ring and . . . OH SHIT! There was a bell!

Her eyes moved to look at her father who smiled at her. Obviously he thought she was too speechless for words. Well, he was partially right. “Um, it’s . . .” She had to remedy this. “It’s awesome, but you know . . . I really enjoy walking to school.” Her brain raked and raked as she saw the frown growing prominent on her father’s features. “I mean, with so much rain it’s a little dangerous to ride a bike to school. But I mean, it’s a really, really great present.” She smiled, even displaying her pearly whites, and she moved forward to examine the bicycle as if she was too enthralled to do otherwise.

She poked it with a trepid finger and felt the thing give a shudder. Her finger withdrew immediately. Would it break? “Yea, it’s wonderful.” She lied. It was all she could do when she saw that big bear grin on her father’s face.

“I was hoping you’d like it. Well, I suppose you can just ride it whenever you like. You don’t have to take it to school.” Her father turned and slunk back inside without another word. Perfect. She glared at the bike, hoping that it would go poof and vanish from sight. At least she didn’t have to ride it to school, but knowing her luck it would rain.