This is dying? I thought it’d hurt more. I’m rather numb, actually.

I never thought I’d die in an alley. Stabbed, no less. Me? Getting stabbed? Never even crossed my mind. I mean, I don’t take risks. I thought old age would get me.

Lots of blood, isn’t there?

What did he want, I wonder? Didn’t take my wallet or anything. Maybe he was scared.

Was everything this dark before I fell?

I wonder if I should yell. Would anyone hear me? Probably not. I don’t think I can do it anyway.

Wish I had a pillow. I think there are rocks under my head.

Good thing my will’s all taken care of. Hope the life insurance pays off for the family. They’d be right ticked off if I kicked the bucket and they didn’t get anything.

I think it’s Sunday. I wonder if there’s anything in the bible about dying on a Sunday. Doesn’t count as working, does it? Oh well. Least I’m Saved.

I hope they don’t bury me in these clothes. The blood’s made them all sticky.

All things considered, I’d probably have been better off bringing my phone with me. Hm. That’ll teach me. Not that I’ll be around to put the lesson to good use.

This is taking rather a long time, isn’t it? Shouldn’t I have bled out by now?

Good grief, my last words to my wife were ‘I’ll be back in half an hour with the milk.’ Wish I’d known this was going to happen. I’d have said something more impressive. I at least would have told her I loved her, instead of just pecking her on the cheek.

I hope they don’t let Aunt Tilda make any of the decisions. She’s always going on about how everyone should be cremated. I can’t stand the thought of being eaten up by flames.

Although I suppose it’ll be the worms if I’m buried…

Oh dear, perhaps I should have thought this through more carefully while I had the chance. Maybe I could leave them a note. ‘No fire, and please don’t let the worms get me.’ But I don’t think I have any paper. Drat.

Ah well. Worms have to eat too, I suppose.

Perhaps I’m not dying. I should think if I was going to, it would have happened ages ago. But then, it’s not as if I can see my watch. Maybe I’m just thinking very quickly.

Are my eyes closed? I can’t tell.

Shouldn’t there be a light somewhere?

Ah. There it is.