what do you do when it's as if everyone hates you?
when it feels like you're all alone.
that's what I've been asking myself the last few days.
you never really know how alone you are until you fuck it all up.
I should know, I do it enough to be a pro.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do or what people expect of me.
I wish I knew.

sometimes I just wish I could disappear, like I was never born.
why can't time just stand still, in one happy moment and nothing else.
forget all the pain you've ever felt and just live in a bubble of happy,
where nothing but pure joy can reach you.
that would be my fantasy; to finally live happily ever after.
if only life were wonderful like that.

what hurts the most, is not being with you.
I have my regrets that I live with every day of my insignificant life.
don't tell me that I'm special, that I actually mean something.
I know it's just a lie, just like everything he's ever said to me.
build up my hopes to see how hard I crash.
it's like his little game, 'see how bad I can hurt her'