Well, Thanks for taking a look. Let me introduce myself. I'm Marr! I Wrote this for a writers group that I joined. This is a Monologue from the viewpoint of a ghost. Or plainly stating, a ghost is telling you this. I'm planning on putting this (Or another story) Into a writers expo coming up. I would really love to hear your input, critism, and/ or help with it. This is my first ever Monologue. Enjoy!

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I had quite a long time to think. Too much time if you ask me. [Pause] You know when you have a thought in your mind and it gets stretched out of proportions? Yeah, That would be me. Half the time I always gave into the "what if…" scenarios. I always wondered what I would have said to him [pause] What I would tell him if I had more time. [pause] If that ground were more sturdy that I stood upon, or at least held off a few more moments. Well, I know what I'd tell him now. After all, I have had enough time to go over it in my thoughts about a few hundred times. It always makes me wish that I hadn't been so afraid to tell him. (Oh, your probably wondering what I'm talking about. Let me tell it the way it was.

You know… I still remember it to this day. Replaying all of the events in my head. Although something this important would linger in your mind for a few years. [Chuckle] Or in my case… Decades!

[Thinks] I'd say it was a good [pause] Oh, seventy years ago. I was just about to celebrate my seventeenth birthday. In fact, I only had about three days from that fateful day God allowed me to be born to that world over sixteen years ago.

A few friends of mine and I had decided to venture up to an old cave that a school friend told us about. Barry Baltimore. [Grins] Interesting type he was. Story teller. He told us that he discovered it while out on a hunting trip on his property. Told us that a huge green monster lived it in. I doubt he even went in. We didn't believe him. I mean, would you? [pause] Then again, he also told us that big foot wandered around at night. [Shakes head]

I can still hear my friends calling my name. I remember looking out the window waving at them and then yelling to my mom that I was leaving. Their voices called out to me again before I could even get out that door. [sigh] They were really impatient! [laughs] Their voices, however, did sound like the ringing of the church bells on a Sunday morning. I was so excited to hurry up and get out there.

The leaves had already started changing that fall. With the ruby reds… the majestic oranges, even those muddy browns ones littered the yards of all our neighbors. It was my favorite time of year. When I raced out of the house kicking up the leaves from behind me like fairy dust, I remember hearing my mother's voice. Oh how sweet her voice was no matter the pitch. "Be careful out there" [Looks down]

[Small laugh] Ironically, Those words still haunt me even now!

I ran straight to my trio of friends. They all seemed so excited just like me. Smiles… glued in place on their faces. I wasn't too sure, but I thought it was the exploring that had Buddy so thrilled. Can't say I blame him. I always loved exploring some unearthed place, where… there wasn't no telling what you'd find or what /dangers/ lay ahead. Then again, I'd go anywhere Buddy did. Secretly, I admired him. Only with him as my very close friend, I didn't want to risk loosing his friendship for something more if it meant not talking to him anymore if didn't work out. [grins] He sure did change from last year. No longer the skinny bean with really short hair I remembered but just the opposite. He had turned into an even more handsome fellow. His chocolate brown hair with bangs that swayed more to the left side of his face. It almost completely covered his left eye. [pause] His eyes… were just the perfect shade of honey brown that always seemed to have a constant light in them whenever he were to look at me. [shakes head, slight smile] It also looked like he had time to work out!

My trio of friends and I had started on our journey while Claira, my best friend, amused us with a colorful story of when she was ready to leave her house. She told us her three brothers got into a fight and stupidly knocked over a bucket of water just as her father came in slipping on the watery mess. She allowed herself to become even more colorful as she imitated her fathers movements as he fell. We all had laughed with her. [Sadness] Those times were so memorable.

We had reached that cave with an hours walk. Upon seeing the destination, I was breathless. Thick, green vines blanketed the outer edges of the cave, while the center of it was as black as black hole and probably just as unknown to what was really inside. We reached the opening and Claira and I held back a few moments to let the guys go first. I'm surprised that Monty could fit as tall as he was, even though the top of his head barely skimmed the top of the cave. Claira and I had to remained behind the guys. We watched as they fought with that sticky white thread that seemed to be instantly attached when it came in contact with skin. I had to stifle a laugh multiple times when Buddy got the silky threads stuck on his face.

I shivered religiously the whole time I was down there. [pause] A bone chilling atmosphere that threatened every chill bump that came up. Cold… Damp… even the air smelled like someone had taken a wet dog, and put him in a small enclosed, hot area. [wrinkle nose]

Buddy stayed close to me as we pushed further ahead of the other two. They were talking or something. I don't remember that part much. I was enjoying that closeness to Buddy too much. That was when the dreadful 'what if…' scenarios came about again. Questions flooded my thoughts just as the dark tunnels seemed to be answering my questions without realizing it. [pause] Nothing visibly, but it was there -even though you couldn't see it. I do remember thinking 'what if I told him…' or 'what if I didn't…' [Puts hand on heart, closing eyes] I could feel my heart racing like a runaway train. Faster and louder as the time grew on.

[Keeps eye's shut] I don't remember much of what happened next. I heard someone scream my name as if someone was shooting at me. My body felt like I had just jumped out of an aircraft. I was suddenly thrust downward in such a manner that I thought my stomach has left me, leaving an open cold spot to trigger my hot breath to no longer exist. I was on the ground before I even knew it. Just laying there [pause] just staring up at the black nothingness.

I remember thinking at that moment panicked. Was I dead? My eye's were closed but, why? Should I open them? Those scenarios came to my thoughts. 'What if I opened them, what would I find?' Oh my God. 'What if Buddy had fallen too?' That though made me push against the heaviness in my eye's. The first thing I saw was a bright light shining down on me and then I screamed. [chuckle] Of course, I didn't scream when I fell over thirty feet to that hard stabbing ground, but I screamed over a light.

I almost thought I was dead when this angelic voice reached my ears. Only then did I realize it was Buddy. His voice was deep. Shaky. Scared and concerned - All at the same time. I focused on that voice of his. Only his. Laying there suddenly, I started to feel every single muscle, bone, piece of flesh burn though me. I remember feeling that sticky sickening feeling in my throat. Everything hitting me at once. I wretched in pain. My body felt like it had been set on fire. Every inch of my former body started to fade out slowly at that moment. That's when I heard him for the last time.

"Don't leave me… please… I need you!"

Buddy's voice came from above, in that angelic tone again. This time, his voice had a different feeling to it. It pulled at me when the words connected to my heart. I would have felt happy if I wasn't laying on such a sharp, cold, and dirty floor.

As the last bit of my former fading body grew colder, those words he spoke stuck to my mind. His voice, still clear in my memories. His voice… Buddy… chocolate brown hair… honey brown eyes… that strong muscular body. I realized he felt the same.

Before I could even reply to him. Before I could even tell him anything [pause] I grew cold [pause] still… just as I am now waiting until the day that Buddy Thomas dies and I get to tell him what I've been meaning to for the past seventy years. That day on September twenty fifth, nineteen thirty eight.