Jealous

Didn’t mean to cause a fight. Didn’t mean to make you cry. When I saw you with that guy, I couldn’t resist... I was just jealous.

-x-

Disclaimer: Jealous belongs to Karl Wolf.

-x-

The rooms seem empty. Cold... alone...

Standing up off my bed, I glanced around my bedroom seeing pictures of you hung across my walls. Pictures of us. Gripping the edge of my dresser, I picked up the silver frame of us on our second year anniversary together.

I took you to Disney Land, since you were having your I’m just a child phase then.

Didn't mean to cause a fight
Babe, I was just jealous

That seemed like eons ago, a time where we both used to be so happy. I can still remember it; the smell of your freshly showered hair, always the scent of coconut and jasmine, your natural body scent, the curve of your neck and just now perfectly my face fit into it when we’re snuggling.

God, I feel totally stupid.

And helpless.

I still remember it, as if it were yesterday and not last month. We were supposed to be going out for dinner—just you and me, making it our three-year together. Our anniversary. I was going to propose to you that evening, making you my wife, to stay with me throughout the remainder of my life.

God I love you.

I remember what you were wearing; that red strapless dress that I loved seeing you in—and out of, as a matter of fact. Your hair was loose, hanging behind you, freshly streaked with the blond high-lights that you wanted so badly.

It looked gorgeous with your deep brown hair. I remember how your fingers curled through my hands as we walked into the restaurant—remember how you smiled at me as I pulled out your seat, remember how your leg ran up mine in your cute attempt to turn me on.

I remember how you licked your lips when you took a sip of your water...

God I love you.

Didn't mean to make you cry
But I was just jealous

We ordered our food and I still remember what you wanted: chicken teriyaki with extra veggies. You laughed at my pathetic joke saying “My proteins will make you healthier than these useless green things,” honestly, it was a bad joke.

But you laughed.

I excused myself to go to the bathroom, blowing you a kiss as the bulge of the ring felt bigger in my back pocket. After dinner, I was going to get down onto one knee, in front of all these people in the restaurant, and propose. Say it for the world to hear:

“Salena Rodriguez, will you marry me?”

God, I really love you.

I was prepared, overjoyed—and my bladder was about ready to explode in the nervousness of the situation. Gulping, I washed my hands repeatedly and wrung it in the bathroom, feeling the case of the diamond ring weighing heavily. I wanted to rip it out right there and run out to you, to slip it onto your finger and twirl you around and repeatedly kiss you.

Haven’t I said it enough? I love you...

But within that split second, everything changed.

Everything.

When I saw you with a guy
I couldn't resist

I walked out to see you in a tight embrace with a tall man—a tall, dark haired, fairly tanned man. I couldn’t hold myself. You were mine. My girl, my future-wife... my everything.

Shit, Salena, you were my life.

No, I lied.

You are my life.

You were wrapped in his arms, smiling like nothing else mattered to you. Without much thought, you reached up on your tiptoes and planted a kiss on his cheek and he laughed, hugging you back. I felt my hand fist—my heart stop.

My life crumble.

Without a second though, I lunged forward. I shouldn’t have. But I did. I ran forward and the echo of the impact of my knuckles against his jaw resonated throughout the restaurant. Your eyes widened, staring at me in fear.

“Dominic!!” You shrieked, my name rolling off your tongue. But it wasn’t the way you normally said it. You sounded mad.

Angry.

Scared.

Cause I knew this was it
You would leave me for him

“Lawrence, oh my god, are you okay?” You ran to him.

My anger escalated. Lawrence was your ex...

Therefore, I had found it a reasonable reason to launch another fist at him. You screamed as he grunted in severe pain. The manager rushed out with a few big security guards and escorted me out. You were in tears, merely watching me get dragged out. I couldn’t stop seething...

Just watching you stand there by Lawrence triggered my anger even more.

Would've told you just to hold me
No reason to worry

I was sitting on our bed in our apartment, cracking my knuckles. I hadn’t changed out of my suit as you walked into the apartment. I heard you drop your keys onto the glass coffee table and walk into our bedroom. I couldn’t look at you—I was staring at the floor.

I saw your silver heels come into my line of vision, and a hand rested on my shoulder.

I tensed.

“Dominic?”

My hands fisted, “Why were you hugging him?”

I was quite aware of the fact you were taken back. Your hand withdrew and you took a step back, in obvious shock.

“He’s my friend--...”

I jumped up, “Your ex!!”

I screamed.

I shouldn’t have...

But I did.

Your eyes were widened, fear racing through you as you took another step back. “Dominic,” you pleaded, “he was telling me how he’s married and expecting to be a father! I couldn’t just—wave him off.”

I snarled.

Never have I given such a response to you.

But I was angry.

“You didn’t have to hug him and kiss him!”

You fisted your hand. “I was not kissing him in the way you make it sound! He’s like a brother now, Dom.”

Dom... You knew that would get to me. But I was too angry to do anything with your nickname for me. I couldn’t even get my breathing under control—my love for you was so much that I became jealous...

Too jealous.

Shit.

I love you so much.

You crossed your arms, “Dom! Stop acting like you’re my husband—he was just a friend.”

That did it.

I slapped you.

Never thought you'd pack
And leave like that in a hurry

You didn’t take it. Immediately, you grabbed your phone, your purse, your jacket and left. I stood there, dumbstruck.

I just realized what I did.

We're just going through a phase
But now that you're gone

I tried calling you. Repeatedly. You never picked up.

Never called back...

I saw Lawrence a few days after with his pregnant wife. I approached him, asking him if he knew where you were.

He walked away as if he didn’t know me.

I deserved it.

I know it's too late
When you walked out that gate

Salena.

I love you—

I don’t know where you are, who you’re with... it’s been a month and you haven’t even called, visited—

My life just disappeared. When you walked out that door...

God.

It was stupid.

I shouldn't have...

But I guess that--

I was just jealous.