Just a Tad, a Romance fanfic - FictionPress.com

Author’s note: This started somewhere between September and October, and it is by far my longest one shot ever. I don’t even know this is a one shot, but you know, I’m making it a one shot because I want it to be, and it was intended to be a one shot. Eh. Happy reading!

I hope you guys can actually make it to the end. You know. Haha.

Just a Tad

Tell her you admire her. When she’s upset, hold her tight. Pick her over all the other girls you hang out with. Play with her hair. Pick her up, tickle her, and wrestle with her. Just talk to her. Tell her jokes. Bring her flowers, just because. Hold her hand and run. Just hold her hand. …Let her fall asleep in your arms. Tell her she looks beautiful. Look into her eyes and smile. Kiss her on the forehead. Kiss her in the rain. If you want to be with her…
tell her.

Unknown

The smile felt twisted and sick on my face like it wasn’t supposed to be there. Of course it felt like that; I mean, it practically took all my willpower to lift the ends of my lips.

OK… minor exaggeration, but still. I had a good reason to feel this nauseous. Come to think of it, I was starting to feel lightheaded… and the room was spinning. A little.

I felt a jab. “Kea, this is Joel. Joel, this is my best friend, Kea.”

I appraised him, making sure he knew I was giving him the offensive once-over. “Uglyboy isn’t so ugly – ow! Sorry, it slipped.”

Ha. No it didn’t. I said that on purpose. Obviously.

I directed my stare to Joel who had an eyebrow raised, but I knew he couldn’t say anything that he wanted to say because this was the first time that we were meeting each other. Avery’s best friend and boyfriend finally meeting…

I still don’t know why I agreed to this. I allowed myself to glare a little, assessing his features. OK. I’ll give him that he’s not ugly, even though I refer to him as that. Avery’s gotten so used to it that she actually responds to my little nickname for her bhe. (Ie. “Where’s uglyface?” “Eating dinner.”)

But judging by his reaction, I’m guessing that she hasn’t told him. But that’s okay, since we have four hours with each other! Oh yes. The fun.

“So.” I squinted at him, shoving Avery away as she protested. So maybe I did say that I wasn’t going to interrogate him. She should’ve known that I wouldn’t actually try to. All she said was “Try not to interrogate him, okay Kea? This is why I don’t let you talk to the guys I like. You embarrass me.”

I, personally, don’t think that’s a very nice thing to say to your best friend. But thinking about it now, I guess I know where she’s coming from. Maybe I did expose her once. Twice.

Maybe fifteen times. But still! What’s the… sixteenth chance, eh?

“Hey,” he said, nodding his head in the universal greeting for guys. Oh God. He’s one of them. I mean, I knew he was one of them, but still, he should’ve proved me wrong.

Wait, where was I? “Hi,” I smiled tightly. “How about… we get to know each other, yeah?”

Avery stiffened beside me and I grinned evilly to myself. This was going to be fun.

“Thanks a lot, Kea. Now he never wants to go to the mall with you ever again.”

“Does it look like I care?”

“Fine. Point taken.”

“Hi, Mrs. Dallins. Is Avery home?”

“Oh, no, you just missed her. She said she was going to meet up with you.”

“With… me? Oh. Oh, um, yes. Yeah, I was just calling to make sure that she left. Okay, thanks, bye!”

“I’m not going to keep covering for you and uglyboy! Do you know how I hate lying to your mom? I mean, not that I can’t lie, because I can, but your mom trusts me!”

“I’m going to bitchslap someone off the face of the earth,” I muttered viciously under my breath. Yanking my seat out, I dumped my bag on the pod and proceeded to extract the leaves entangled in my hair. Sadly, hitting the snooze button twenty times in a row made you late.

Obviously. I had to run and I tripped six times. Three of them happened to be directly in front of a bush.

“You’re late, Kea,” my Physics teacher informed me in a drawl. I smiled sheepishly and accepted the marked test that he was handing out.

I nearly had a heart attack.

“A 59! What is this nastiness?” I gasped for breath. Squinting at the red marks, I frowned thoughtfully. I remember those. Well, crap. Okay. I think it’s best for both my mother and I if she doesn’t see this. I can raise my mark up by midterms on the next test! Yes, brilliant plan, Kea.

Or – or maybe he made a mistake! Maybe I was actually supposed to get a 95. Maybe… he switched the numbers around?

Oh please, like I’m that stupid. But still, wishful thinking…

“You look like you want to burn a hole through the paper.”

I looked up at the sound of a familiar voice and felt my lips pull into a strained smile. “I’m failing all my classes,” I shared.

“Oh, I’m sure that – “

“No.” I cut him off. “I got a 24 percent on my math test. I got a 63 on my bio, and I get this nasty mark for physics.” It all started to click in my head and I groaned in despair. My head whipped up sharply when I heard snickers.

“Disorganized?” His eyes flitted over my messy pod and I flushed, yanking my papers into a semi-neat pile.

“Possibly,” I said.

“Listen. I actually need a favour…”

My ears perked. He never asked me for favours. Come to think of it, he stopped talking to me when – er, that thing happened. Now we only say hi to each other in the hallways.

“That sounds familiar,” I joked.

He paused. “Well, maybe it is familiar.” He gave me a meaningful look but I continued to stare blankly at him. I, honestly, sucked at reading between the lines. If you’re trying to tell me something, then be blunt about it because otherwise, I am blissfully ignorant.

Or obliviously stupid. I prefer the former though.

Frowning, I leaned forward in anticipation. “How familiar?”

He continued to look at me meaningfully and I continued to stare at him blankly. Maybe he’ll get the message. Maybe he’ll read my mind and figure out that I have absolutely no idea what he’s talking about!

Or maybe I should just tell him I’m dumb and I don’t know where he’s going with this.

Yeah. Yeah, that’d probably work.

But before he could even utter a word, my evil physics teacher yelled, “Pop quiz!” and brought me to pain.

My eyes grew wide in horror. “Oh, God. No!” And I threw myself into my books for thirty seconds of studying.

I failed. I failed. Oh, God. I tried not to wince as I took steps away from my physics classroom. But I can’t afford another fail. This was not the way I wanted to start my eleventh year! God, and I thought I was slacking last year…

I felt a warm hand enclose around my elbow that halted my steps. Instinctively, I pulled away a little and looked over my shoulder. My eyes landed on dimples too close for comfort.

I blinked.

“Maybe we should take this elsewhere,” he suggested that smile still on his face as he dragged me from the middle of the crowded hallway. I fought to gather my thoughts as I followed him suspiciously. I’m guessing he wanted to finish our conversation before – before I failed. Oh, God. Here we go again.

“Look,” he said and ran a hand through his hair. We were situated at the end of the hallway. He was leaning against the window and I stood in front of him curiously, both hands in my pockets. He seemed nervous, I concluded, but more frustrated. “I need a favour.”

“We’ve established that,” I said. “But sure. What is it?”

He looked at me in disbelief. “Just like that, you agreed?”

I was confused. “Well, sure. Unless you want me to do something life threatening, then I’d have to reconsider.”

“Shouldn’t you listen to what I need a favour for?”

I tilted my head, amused. “Do you want me to help you or not?”

Dale Jacobs. How do I explain my relationship with him? I guess I knew him before I met him. We talked plenty before we actually saw each other face to face when he transferred to my school just last year. So technically, this is his school, too. Obviously. Haha, okay.

His lips pulled into a smirk and he tilted his head to look at the ceiling. “Sometimes you’re too nice for your own good.”

“Oh.” Bemused, I observed him. “So, then I won’t help you.”

He narrowed his eyes jokingly in my direction and I laughed. Grinning, he held his hands in front of him and for a moment, I was lost in his brown eyes that seemed to glint. But then I dubbed it as the sunlight hitting him the right way from the window behind him.

Oh. He was talking. Whoops.

“Sorry,” I said sheepishly when he looked at me expectantly. “I wasn’t listening.”

“I know,” he said. “You were too busy staring at me.”

“Oh, yes, you sexy beast.” I winked. “But really, what is it?”

He held my eyes for a moment. “I need you to go out with me.”

I can do this. I can solve this math equation. I mean, sure the teacher sucks, but that doesn’t mean that I have to succumb into his negative aura. Yes. Okay. I’m focused. But stills, if he was a good teacher then he would teach us, instead of spending an hour and ten minutes telling us what dumbasses we were and we should’ve taken applied math if we didn’t understand what he was saying –

But that’s okay. It’s okay. I can learn this by myself. I did that last year and I passed with flying colours. Ms Savajonas couldn’t teach for beans, but at least she gave us competent notes. Oh, and she was nice.

“Mr. Ross is just evil,” I muttered into the phone. Avery laughed.

“We’re so stupid this year,” she said. Oh, I agreed with her. Oh my. Usually we would be complaining about getting eighties, but we’re barely touching sixties. Those eighties looked so beautiful right now.

“So guess what,” Avery said, her tone brightening. I knew what that meant, and I had to literally bite my tongue to keep from groaning out loud. But that didn’t stop me from groaning in complete and utter despair inwardly.

Three, two, one –

“I have a date with Joel. A double date, actually.” She said, her tone twisting into worry and another tone I didn’t know what to call. “It’s going to be so weird, because this guy is like, one of his main boys. You know what I mean?”

I paused from banging my head silently against my desk to give a muffled, “Yes,” before resuming to kill my brain cells off.

Honestly, you have no idea how many times I’ve been through this. Not only with Joel, but with ex-crushes and boyfriends… guys that liked her but she had no idea… Sometimes I really hated having a best friend who was so hot and stupidly oblivious. Gosh.

“What should I wear?” I vaguely heard.

I tried to continue with my math equation, feeling my eyebrow tick. I will not explode, I will not explode, I will not explode –

“What difference would it make if he’ll be ripping your clothes off by the main course?” I blurted. And then I wanted to die.

Shit. I did not just say that.

There was an offended gasp on the other line, and I was torn between laughing in horror and proceeding to bang my head against my desk.

I decided to do both. Just, you know, because I was so great at multitasking.

“Oooh, Kea,” she hissed. “You did not just say that. And stop laughing! It’s not funny, and definitely, not true.”

I gasped for breath, my cheek against the cool surface of my desk. “Sorry, I swear it slipped.” She muttered something which I chose to ignore and I giggled. “But seriously, that boy is a slut. What exactly was the longest make-out session you’ve guys had?” I asked knowingly with a disgusted twitch to my face.

She gurgled but didn’t say anything. Good, I’m glad.

“Exactly,” I said smugly, trying to frantically erase the mental image of the couple attacking each other’s bodies without exactly having sex. It was more of dry sex, actually… those little nasties. Why am I her friend again?

“Kea!” she said, scandalized.

What?

Oh. Ooh. I said that out loud. Oops.

“Sorry! It… slipped.”

“Sure it did,” she said. I shrugged dismissively. “And it wasn’t like sex.” Her voice lowered to a whisper. I had a feeling she was looking over her shoulder in a paranoid state. She wasn’t exactly allowed to date until… well, until she was thirty.

Then again, I was in the same boat as her.

“You sent me a picture of your hickey,” I reminded, glancing at my bed where my cell phone was lying there… somewhere. Why haven’t I deleted that off? It was made by ugly boy, and I didn’t exactly fancy him at the moment. “And I’ve seen – “

“Okay!” she shrilled. “I understand. God.” She paused. “But it wasn’t like it was – okay, I lied.” She laughed. “It was that good.”

Horrified, my pencil hovered over my sheet of paper before I slammed the phone down. Warily, I stared at the phone – yes, I hung up on her – before flinging myself off my chair and bounced to the living room in an effort to erase that particularly vile conversation I just had. Shuddering, I pulled the fridge door open just as the phone rang.

Oh, God. It was her. I stared at the black phone hanging on the wall, before I slowly dragged myself towards it. I vaguely wondered if she was mad at me for hanging up on her. I mean, it was my first time.

Excluding all those other times she went off about her (gag) boyfriend. Then I’d have to say this was my fifty-sixth time. And yes, I kept track.

“If you’re going to talk about uglyface, then I will be hanging up right now,” I greeted.

There was a pause and a chuckle. Huh. I never actually noticed how deep and manly Avery’s chuckles were.

“And who is this uglyface?” a familiar voice drawled lightly. And it wasn’t Avery-familiar.

Oh, crap. “Dale!” I gasped, clutching the phone. “Sorry, I thought you were someone else.”

“Apparently,” he said, his voice amused. I slapped my forehead and silently kicked myself for not checking the caller ID. Now he probably thought I was weird.

OK. Weirder than how weird he already thought of me. I mean, not that I was weird, because I wasn’t. Maybe just a tad, but I don’t go spreading that information around to the whole world.

“I called your cell,” he said.

Flustered, I tried to gather my thoughts. “You did? Sorry, it’s stuffed under my blankets somewhere,” I said sheepishly. “What can I do you for?”

“Actually, can you answer the door?”

What? Confused, I turned my head in the direction of the front door. Well, I did have to answer it, since no one was home, but how did he know that? “But no one’s – ”

He chuckled. “Answer the door, Kee.” And the line went dead.

I tried to clear my muffled head, probably due to the fact that he just told me to answer the door when I didn’t even hear the door bell - and how the crap would he know? - and he used the nick name that I haven’t heard since I was a child.

The door bell rang.

And now I realized what was going on.

I raced to the door, pulling it open to see him grinning at me. I made a face at him. “What if I wasn’t home? What if you were just standing out here like a loser, ringing the door bell, but no one answered it because –”

“It’s not getting any warmer out here,” he pointed out, an eyebrow raised. He was right, of course, since I felt the cold autumn breeze against my bare legs. Sighing, I pulled the door open and allowed room for him to come in.

I raised my eyebrows, assessing him. I can’t deny that this was weird, because honestly, he was the first boy to ever step into my house that wasn’t a family friend. I blamed the strict parents.

“So how are you?” I asked, mostly to break the silence, but I partially did want to know how he was. How did he get here, anyway? Did he walk? Ride the bus? Fly?

“I’m… great.” I noted the way he frowned when he answered. Obviously he wasn’t great, that little liar. “And yourself?”

“Fantastic,” I responded, beckoning him to follow. “So, do you want a drink? A snack? Tissue?”

His voice was amused. “Why would I need a tissue?”

“Um.” I tapped my chin thoughtfully, pulling the cupboard open. “I don’t know, really. You never know.”

“Right.” His eyebrows rose and I shrugged, stretching the bag of chips I had in his direction. He shook his head and I retracted.

“Come,” I said impulsively, heading to my room. “I stashed my chocolate bars in my closet.” But then I realized I shouldn’t have said anything because it abruptly registered that I was talking to a guy.

But then half a second later, I decided it didn’t matter for obvious reasons.

“I actually had a reason to come by, you know,” he said, his voice humoured, but I could tell that he was a tad uncomfortable. Oh well.

“I figured.” I shut the door behind us, leaning against it as I assessed him. He was suddenly glancing around my room, like you usually do when you step into a place you’ve never been before. I followed his eyes, vaguely wondering if I should’ve made my bed and kicked my bras and tank tops out of sight.

“Nice room.”

I snapped out of my reverie and looked at him to see his smirk. I smirked a tad, and shrugged, walking over to my closet.

“So, what did you want to say?” I asked over my shoulder, digging through my clothes in the shelf where I knew I pushed my Mr Big bar there just yesterday. But only because my beastly cousin claimed that he was going to steal it away from me.

Never mind that he was four. It was the principle. It’s better to be safe than sorry, right?

“I think you know what I want to say.”

I think it was his intense voice that made me stiffen for a hot sec there. Every time it got to me. His voice would turn serious, and those words he would be saying would feel like it was piercing right through you and -

Obviously I’m analyzing this a tad too much. But really, it just made your heart beat harder.

With my hand still in my stack of clothes, I turned my head to glare at him. He was quirking an eyebrow in my direction challengingly and I felt a zap of annoyance at how arrogant he was being this instant. Oh, how arrogant people irked me.

“I walked away for a reason,” I pointed out.

“My ego says thanks, by the way.”

I scoffed amusedly. “I had a reason,” I repeated, and turned back, furiously trying to locate the chocolate bar, mostly only to distract myself. The hot flush in my stomach didn’t go unnoticed and I literally rolled my eyes at myself at my pathetic situation.

Seriously, I was such a teenage girl. Jeez.

“You didn’t hear my reason,” he said. I realized, alarmed, that he was right behind me. OK. How do I run away without him catching me?

What am I talking about? He’s at my house! I can make him leave, yo. Yeah. Really, I can.

“And what’s that?” I asked, a little breathless. Oh, God. Unable to help myself, my brain flashed to where he was professing his love for me. My heart caught to my throat -

“I still like Avery.”

- and then it collapsed into my stomach. Again.

Well, this was a tad bit uncomfortable, if you know what I mean. At first, for that moment that seemed to last for a long time, but was really only a few seconds, I stood there, taking it in. Huh. I guess this is how it felt like to be hurt. That hot, heavy feeling of embarrassed shame, for thinking of something that’ll never come true…

Oh woe is me. Ha.

Raising an eyebrow, I turned my head, catching his eye. I mistook his stance to be a few more feet away from me, so my breath caught when I found myself staring at his lips.

I hated him. “Um, she has a boyfriend,” I said, sarcastic, and smirked. He was unperturbed. “I’m guessing you’re not done.”

“You were always brilliant.” His teeth flashed and I shrugged, returning to my Chocolate Mission. “I know that we agreed that it was best - ”

“Two years ago,” I added distractedly.

“Yeah - but seeing her with him is just pissing… me… off.”

“Jealous?”

“No. Really?”

My hand enclosed around a wrapper-like material and I beamed triumphantly. “OK,” I said, turning to him. “You still like her. You’re jealous, and the sight of them makes you mad. Where do I come in?”

He held my eyes, and thankfully, I stopped myself from imagining anything ludicrous. “I need you to go out with me,” he repeated his words, his voice as solemn as the first time.

Oh. Now I understood, and I seriously questioned his sanity. “You think that me going out with you… will make her jealous, and somehow realize that she’s missing you too, and she’ll leave uglyboy to continue your relationship?”

We stared at each other for a while.

“Saying it like that,” he said thoughtfully, “makes it sound a little…”

“Psychotic? Obsessive? Weird?” the words shot out of my mouth.

He shot me a look. “No.”

“Sure,” I said. “But like I said, I have my reason for rejecting you.” He twitched here and I smirked at his obvious ego bruising. “Avery’s my best friend, Dale. You know that. It’s practically a rule that we can’t date each other’s ex boyfriends!”

He shot me a look. “Says who?”

“The unwritten rules of Best Friends!”

“I know that you guys talked about this. If she were to date your ex, what would you do?”

I frowned. “But I’ve never - ”

“Answer the question, Kee.”

I squinted at the nickname and sighed. “Honestly? I wouldn’t care. She’s my best friend, and I just want her to be happy. And Lord knows that she’s happy with someone she likes. It really wouldn’t bother me since I’d be over… him.” I frowned. Whoever he was.

He smirked knowingly. “And what did she say?”

I twitched at the memory. “Um, she said, and I quote, I’ll fucking kill you.” I paused, taking in his amused expression. “But she was joking!” I said hurriedly. “I know she was because, really. I mean, really. She wouldn’t do that. She’d probably…”

“Ignore you. Get pissed off. You know how she’s like,” he said.

I tried not to flinch. “Um, yeah.”

There was silence, and I tried not to picture my best friend stabbing me with a toothpick.

“What’s your point?” I said awkwardly, suddenly feeling like he can read my mind, every thought, and every memory nude to his eyes.

“How about you see what she’d really do?”

My awkwardness vanished and I peered at him as if he were insane. “That’s your argument? That’s how you’re going to convince me to go along with your plan? Just to see if she’d follow up with her word?” I couldn’t help but laugh at him. And the thought of how horrifying it would be to actually go through it. Oh, God. “You’re insane.”

He didn’t look the least bit offended that I laughed in his face. In fact, all he did was shrug, “So will you help me out?”

My eyebrows drew together. Ew. He was actually serious about this all? “What’s in it for me?”

It was like he was prepared for the question, because the second it left my mouth, the words that shot out from his were, “You don’t have to put up with uglyboy anymore.”

Huh. Never thought of it that way.

“So… all I have to do is to make sure she sees us together?”

“Basically.”

“She’s going to corner me, you know.”

“Oh, I know. That’s why you tell her that you like me.”

“…You do realize exactly how insane you sound. Just a tad, you know. Worse than the first time.”

“Like people don’t do this.”

“Um. Right.”

“You don’t have to do this, you know. Seriously.”

“Stupid guilt… trip. Ugh. Just buy me a Kit Kat and I’ll be happy. Oh. And make sure that you get rid of uglyboy. He’s hogging my best friend, that cow.”

“Is that her? No. She’ll never wear those horrifying pants.” There was a slight pause. “Oh, my God, I see her! No, wait, ew, that guy is actually hot.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Uglyboy isn’t.”

“Ah.”

“I see her! No. Wait. Never mind.”

Frowning in agitation, I swerved and tried to locate the certain black haired girl. This was killing me. I’m going to be tortured. Karma will hurt me. I will be hunted down. Oh, God.

Maybe I should back down. Maybe.

“She’s not here,” he said. “What’s with all the guesses?”

“I’m not wearing my glasses,” I admitted grudgingly. “But I’d recognize her!”

I finally looked at him, and he turned away. But I didn’t miss the twitch of his lips. Oh jeez. He always did like laughing at my blindness. I never like wearing my glasses, and my parents were such cows concerning contact lenses. So I travel the world blind.

But it’s good, because everyone I meet are hot through my eyes. I don’t see their flaws. Ha.

“Relax, Kee.” His soothing voice tumbled down my spine and I twitched out of habit because of the nickname. He needs to stop calling me that. “We’re here to chill. If she doesn’t see us, I don’t care. It doesn’t matter.”

I whirled in on him. “I thought you needed her to see us together!”

“Well, she does need to see us. But if she doesn’t…”

“I blew off studying for physics because of this.”

“I’ll tutor you.”

“I’ll fail and then it’s going to be your -” I stopped talking and his words registered. “You’d tutor me? Seriously? Are you even passing?” I goggled in his direction and snapped out of my reverie when I saw him nod.

He’s passing.

“You liar!”

No one said I had to believe him. I mean, come on, if I wasn’t passing, then why would he pass? He falls asleep in class. (More than I do, anyway.) I see him across the room. I hear him across the room. If those weren’t snores, I don’t know what is.

“What did you get on your test?” I demanded. I failed that ugly test with a 33 percent. As far as I know, no one got higher than 65.

“82 percent,” he said.

Silently, I observed him, trying to pick up any emotion to see if he was lying. He stared right back at me, a hint of a smile on his lips, but other than that…

“Oh, God. You are passing,” I moaned into my hands and turned away.

“It’s actually easy, you know,” he said. “You just need to know the formula’s and copy the notes he’s written down.”

“His writing is miniscule. I can’t see it even with my glasses.”

“That’s why I’ll help you,” he said, throwing an arm over my shoulders. I eyed his arm with distaste and missed the amused smirk that crossed his features.

“No one likes a bragger.”

“I’m not bragging. I’m merely flaunting that I’m better at you in this subject.”

“Oh, my mistake,” I drawled. “No one likes an arrogant cow.”

“You say cow too much.”

“Suck my toe.”

“That too. You say that a lot too.”

I kissed my teeth loudly and pointedly looked over my shoulder to avoid his laughing eyes; but only because I knew that if I looked I wouldn’t be able to keep my serious façade on and, well, I’d end up laughing.

“Are you hungry?” he asked, gently guiding me in the direction of the food court. The hot flush returned to my stomach but I studiously ignored that unsightly feeling. Not for the first time, I longed for more guys to be like my beautiful friend, Dale, here. He’s a prime example that chivalry isn’t all that dead. Just a tad.

“I’m always hungry,” I said, patting my stomach. He chuckled. I peered around the food court, squinting and took a seat when we reached a table. “So, what’re we ordering?”

He shrugged. “Whatever you want.”

“Pizza,” I declared. My mouth drooled at the thought.

I stared at him from across the table. Trust me, it wasn’t hard to. I mean, his good looks were a bonus and all, but I thought I ate a lot. No seriously, I had eight slices of pizza.

“Stop gawking, it’s unattractive,” he said around a mouth full of pizza.

I tried to tear my eyes away from him but I couldn’t help but continue to stare in awed horror. “You’re unattractive. That’s your twelfth slice.”

“So? You had ten.”

“Eight.”

“Eight. That’s off by two.”

Twitching, I finally was able to look away and returned my attention to the salad in front of me. Distractedly, I stabbed the salad and brought it to my mouth. Oddly enough, I was starting to get the vibe that people were looking in our direction. OK, so three boxes of pizza was a tad bit too much for two people, but what was the big deal?

Man, I’m sort of still hungry…

“We still haven’t touched the fries,” he said and downed half of his water bottle.

“I was trying to be polite and not look like a pig.”

He stared at me for a moment before smirking a bit too cheekily in my direction. “If that’s what’s stopping you then you don’t have to worry. It’s too late.”

I made a face at him and chucked a straw wrapper in his direction. Whatever, I could eat more. I made a move to reach for more but I saw something from my peripheral vision and looked up. Instantly, I twitched and my personal phrase ‘She’s pretty, I hate her’ popped into my mind when I saw two girls standing there.

Wonderful. Right when they probably witnessed me attack my own box of pizza under twenty minutes and reach for more food.

“Hey, Dale,” they greeted, an air of confidence around them. Distractedly, I stabbed my salad once again and brought it to my mouth. Was it just me or did Dale look just a little uncomfortable?

Well, if he did, he looked cool and casual now, I mused, chewing on a French fry. His charming grin was on his face as he pushed away his food and leaned back perceptibly to give them his undivided attention. Uck, I hated how… attentive he was. He’s just look at you like you were the only person he saw in the world when you were talking… which all the other girls said that I happened to speak to. And maybe I noticed that too. Every now and then. Not all the time, because I don’t.

I smacked my forehead and groaned to myself. Looking up, Dale was still talking to them.

Ah yes, that was lovely. Ignoring my presence so blatantly was so touching. That was so nice of the two ladies.

“So, would you mind if we joined you?” the blonde said a little too nicely as she glanced sideways at me. I raised my eyebrows in her direction and shrugged when Dale looked at me inquiringly. I did a double take back when he sent me this really peculiar expression. He looked uncomfortable again and then I realized what he was trying to say.

Goodness. What am I, stupid?

Clearing my throat, I pretended to check my cell phone and stood up. “Actually,” I said in my polite voice, “I have to go.” I dug for a twenty in my pocket and slapped it on the table, trying not to meet their eyes. “Thanks for lunch, Dale. See you at school.”

I walked away and tried to ignore the burning hurt lodged at my throat knowing that he wanted me out of his sight.

“You don’t know that,” I muttered miserably to myself. For all I know he -

Whatever. There’s no use in thinking about it now. What’s done is done.

The phone rang and I tried not to dive for it, but I found myself diving anyway. I tend to always do that when the phone rang. It’s a habit that I’m trying to break, but I always answer the phone in my house.

I checked the caller ID and my hand froze, inwardly debating whether or not I should answer the phone and bring me to my doom (besides that of physics). My guilty conscience won and I picked it up on the last ring before it was to hit the voice mail.

“Hey! I haven’t spoken to you in so long,” greeted an overly cheery voice.

I now have to suffer the consequences of my actions. I tried to inject as much enthusiasm in my voice and managed to pull it off. There’s no sense in telling her what’s been happening in my life because she’d just override my story with one of her amazing stories.

Hm.

“Really?” I said on cue and tried to get into the conversation more, but really couldn’t. All we (she) ever talked about was her boyfriend and the most amazing thing that ever happened transpired between them, or the most sweetest, or the most memorable… Following?

I didn’t have the heart to tell her that I honestly didn’t give a damn. She used up my last ounce of care in my body.

“So did anything interesting happen?” she asked after an hour of story-telling.

I snapped out of my dozed state and automatically said, “No. You know me, I’m as normal as anyone can get.” But by the end of my sentence I realized my little plan with Dale wasn’t that normal. But obviously I wouldn’t tell her. I mean, he didn’t exactly tell me not to tell her, but I guess it goes without saying.

I just had to make sure that I don’t bring up Dale. Then all will be good.

“So guess who I saw yesterday,” she said.

Distractedly, I rearranged the placemats on my kitchen table. “Hmm?”

“Dale. His family came over for dinner.”

I nearly slipped and kept from gasping out loud. OK, it’s different when she mentions him. “Oh yeah?” I said, strained. “I just saw him at the mall.”

“Mhm. We had an awesome time yesterday,” she laughed. “It was so funny because I wasn’t really paying attention, but I guess he was trying to say something and I burned him by walking away. So he grabbed my ankle the last second and I fell on his lap. Aw-kward.”

…Then how was that funny?

I tried to ignore the annoyance pumping my veins and rubbed my forehead. I forced a chuckle. “Wow, that must’ve been really awkward,” I said, trying not to sound too mocking. “Did you feel sparks?” I asked sarcastically.

There was an unnatural pause that I didn’t bother reading into and she went, “Huh?” in a high squeaky voice I knew that she used as the guilt tone.

“What do you mean by that?” I narrowed my eyes at nothing.

“Nothing,” she said, her voice still a squeak.

Oh, goodness. “Please, I know you well enough to know that when you use that tone there’s something on your mind. So what, do you find Dale hot or not?”

“He goes to your school. I’m pretty sure you can be the judge of that.”

“Okay then. So what exactly is going on?”

“Nothing,” she said, her voice uncomfortable this time. It reminded me of what transpired at the mall and I tried to forget about it. “We’re just friends.”

“Of whom you’ll always have feelings for,” I finished knowingly. He was truly the first boyfriend she’s ever had, and the guy I only approved of. He was everything a girl could ask for in a guy.

I honestly don’t know why they broke up.

Oh, wait. Right, he moved five hours away. But now he’s back so… then what?

“I have a boyfriend,” she said, not bothering to inject protestation into her voice. We were so used to each other that we can practically read each other’s minds. Well, for the most part anyway. She still has no idea that I’m even annoyed at her some times. She doesn’t bother hiding the fact when she’s pissed off at me.

“Right,” I said. And that’s all I said so she began humming as I continued rearranging the kitchen. No words were needed to tell each other what we already knew.

“Thank you for that wonderful day yesterday,” said a voice right beside me. I looked away from my locker to see Dale glaring at me like I did something offensive. Raising an eyebrow, I allowed myself to hold his gaze for a moment before turning back to my locker. I was still a little snubbed, and I had the right to be, so he can’t say anything. Ha.

“You’re welcome,” I said, not bothering to figure out what the hell he was going on about. I missed studying for physics for him and he’s going all sarcastic on me. Lovely.

“You left me,” he stated, following me to our first class together.

“That I did.”

“Why the hell would you do that?”

I stopped walking and looked up at his frustrated and annoyed tone. He had his hands in his pockets and he was looking at me with the most thwarted expression on his face that I couldn’t help but smile. “That’s what you wanted, wasn’t it?” I asked. “I was leaving you to give you privacy.”

“I didn’t want privacy. I’d rather be with you then with girls trying to throw themselves at my feet. Do you not know how to read expressions of Help?”

I observed him thoughtfully. “No. Sorry. I thought you wanted me to leave.” Well, I guess all that hurt was for nothing.

He rolled his eyes. “No.” I was about to head towards my usual pod, but his hand shot out and began to pull me farther from my seat.

“Wah - hey! What’re you doing?”

“Do you need help with this class or not?”

Awkwardly, I stared at our connected hands and tried to calm my erratic heart. “Yeah, I do. Thanks.”

He waited until I took a seat to ask his question. Until then I’d been carefully avoiding his eyes and keeping the distance between us understandable. “What’s with you? Are you alright?”

I froze midway from reaching into my bag and pasted a convincing smile on my face. “Nothing’s with me. I’m fine. I just didn’t wake up on the proper side of the… bed… or whatever, this morning.” I waved him off and took a seat.

OK. Obviously I was lying, but he didn’t need to know that friggin’ Avery pissed me off so hard yesterday that I didn’t feel like talking to anyone today at all. She didn’t even go to my school, but she could still anger me without knowing it.

Sighing, I tried to push away our conversation, but fell futile.

“So how is Dale? Do you talk to him?” she asked curiously.

I resisted the urge to laugh at the question. Yes, of course we talk. “Yeah. I mean, in the passing. But ever since - you know - it’s been a tad bit awkward, and you’re basically connecting us together.”

“Haha, yeah… But he’s really nice, you know. If you talk to him obviously you guys can find something else to talk about besides me and this weird threesome relationship.”

I laughed. “Yeah, but without you there, it’s weird for me talking to a guy. If you hadn’t noticed, I don’t usually talk to them without having the need to.”

“It’s okay,” she soothed. “They’re just like girls.”

“Right. And it would be a tad odd if I started to like him without you as reminder,” I said jokingly without thinking.

There was a pause and an unnatural laugh. “Yeah, but don’t get ahead of yourself, Kea. He goes for the attractive ones, you know?”

I didn’t say anything and she realized what she said. “Nooo, I didn’t mean it like that!” She laughed. “It’s just, you know, you’re not his type. I know what his type is, and it’s the sociable, girly-girl type.” She meant, like her. “And like you said, you can hardly talk to guys without going awkward and… weird. You compliment the features no one notices. ‘I like your eyelid crease.’ What is that, Kea?”

I pursed my lips, staring unseeingly at the whiteboard. So what if I say weird things? That shouldn’t be held against me. Not for the first time since last night, an ugly hand clamped my gut. Yeah, this was the priced I paid for being best friends with someone so damn hot and oblivious.

“Seriously, Kee, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I said, tensing. “And don’t call me that.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Why not?”

“Just -” I made useless gestures before allowing my hands to fall on the desk. “Just don’t. It’s - ” too intimate.

“It’s…?”

“Never mind.” I rubbed my face and turned to him watching me with his eyebrow still raised. “Anyway, I heard that you went to Avery’s for dinner.” His expression dropped to a casual one and I continued. “Heard about that ankle thing too. Bet you liked her on your lap, didn’t you.”

He looked away, but I didn’t miss the hint of a smirk on his face. “Maybe.”

I laughed. “Maybe,” I echoed. “Sure, buddy.”

“By the way,” he said and searched his bag for a moment. I didn’t see him toss me the red bar until it was too late.

Scowling, I nursed my bruising forehead and glared at his laughing form. “Shut up.”

“That’s for yesterday,” he said, nodding to the Kit Kat.

I happily tore it open and broke off a piece. “Thanks! Want one?” I held it to his direction and he shook his head. I made a face. “Ew, what’s wrong with you, rejecting chocolate like that. No, here, you have to have one now.”

“But I bought it for you,” he pointed out, his eyes trying to meet mine. Awkwardly, I averted my eyes from his and focused on getting a stick of chocolate into his hand.

“So? Now it’s mine and I’m offering it to you.”

We struggled for a few moments before I managed to shove it in the direction of his opened mouth. I met his shocked eyes with a cackle and grinned at his face, my hand still over his mouth. “Now chew.”

He shook his head, glaring at me determinedly.

I glared. “Chew!”

He shook his head.

“Stupid cow, I said - ”

His hand shot up and grabbed mine in a tight grip, tearing it from his face. I knew my face was flushed because it felt hot and he chewed the chocolate in his mouth, holding my eyes all the same, as with my hand. I tried to look away from his lips, but couldn’t find the will to do so.

“You’re just a bit persistent, did you know that?” he said with a lazy grin, licking his lips.

I felt oddly heavy and lightheaded, but fought hard to look neutral. “I’d do anything to get what I want,” I said, my voice oddly thick. I cleared my throat embarrassedly and noticed him still clutching my hand. I gave it a pointed look, but he didn’t release me.

He chuckled a little. “Are you this naturally red, or only when someone touches you?”

How dare he? I gawped for a few moments before roughly taking my hand away. “Only when people touch me,” I replied, not bothering to see why I should lie. It won’t matter anyway. “That’s why I don’t like people too close.”

“Figuratively or literally?”

I looked at him oddly for his choice of a rebuttal question. “Both?”

“Hm. Right.”

“Okay.” I took my seat and looked through yesterday’s homework.

“Kee?” he said.

I let the slip slide and looked up from my work. “Yeah?”

“You good now?” And I realized that he did all that just to bring me into a lighter mood. I felt an odd combination of happiness and misery swell inside me and I lowered my eyes.

“Yeah…”

I looked at the black and white keys thoughtfully. The little boy beside me was playing beautifully right now. Well, as beautiful as a five year old can get.

“Good job,” I said brightly. “Next song plea - ”

“Keannrian,” my Slovakian teacher called just as the door opened with a loud creak. I tried not to flinch at the sound of my full name and turned around inquiringly. “That is all for now. Thank you for your help.”

I stood up from my seat. “No problem, miss.”

I walked out of the room and headed in the direction of the waiting room. I’ve been playing the piano since I was ten and despite the fact that many grow to hate it as the years go by, I find myself taking interest every time I learn a new song.

Now my teacher was supervisor of this conservatory and wanted all her students to take the student-teacher course which required 80 hours of voluntary work. I’m up at 40 right now, so I’m half way there!

There meaning where I get paid instead of hours.

“I thought you had piano on Saturdays.”

I turned around and stared at Dale, dumbfounded and shook my head to rid of my reverie. “I do.” I furrowed my eyebrows in his direction. “Um, what’re you doing here?” I knew for a fact that none of his siblings took piano and he had no interest in learning either. He enjoyed listening to music, but that was basically it…

“I came to see you.”

I raised an eyebrow, shrugging my jacket on. “Oh yeah? Why?”

Let me guess, it had something to do with Avery.

“There’s a party tonight.”

“That’s nice,” I said, “but I think that you should know that I have very strict parents and they won’t let me out of the house after dark. It doesn’t matter if it’s after six or if I’m seventeen years old. They told me that bad people don’t care how old you are when they’re chopping your body and throwing it into the waters.” It wasn’t difficult to keep my monotone voice. My dad seriously told me that when I asked him to go to the movies at 10 PM.

I didn’t think that it was a big deal, seeing how we literally lived right across the mall with the theatres. But I guess I didn’t think hard enough, because my parents went off. An hour lecture there that I could’ve avoided… Oh man.

He looked at me bemusedly. “Damn, must suck having Asian parents.”

“Technically we’re part Spanish too, so I’m not fully Asian. And look who’s talking.”

“I’m half,” he said dismissively.

“Whatever,” I glared at his tone. “Either way I can’t go. Sorry.”

He observed me for a moment and rocked on his heel. I resisted the urge to tap my foot impatiently or glance at my wrist for the time. Never mind the fact that I didn’t even have a watch to begin with. Cell phones do the job.

“I’m starting to think that you’re avoiding me.”

“Avoiding you?” Shit. “What makes you think that I’m avoiding you? I would never do such a thing.” I’m such a liar.

“You walk away when you see me.”

“Only sometimes,” I conceded. “I apologize for that.”

“Right. So what the hell did I do?”

“It’s not you,” I reassured, glancing absentmindedly over his shoulder. What if I tried going around him really fast? Would he notice? Never mind, don’t answer that. “It’s Avery.”

“Avery?” His tone made me reluctantly look at him and I wished I hadn’t. His expression was clearly one of incredulity, like he was speaking to a moron who just said that she was trying to avoid the one person that they were bent on getting the attention of.

Which was actually my case. Whatever. Point is I’m ignoring him and it’s all Avery’s fault.

“Okay,” he said slowly. “What did Avery do to make you ignore me?”

“I would tell you,” I said, giving him a look, “but then I’d have to - “

“Kill me?” One end of his lips lifted and amusement was apparent in his eyes. I cleared my throat and said nothing. “Okay, Kee, I respect your parent’s rules.”

“Kea,” I corrected automatically and nodded. “Thanks. And sorry.”

I walked around him without any warning and smiled a little bit when I heard him muttering under his breath about a psychotic fool. But then I frowned, realizing the insult.

“So are you busy right now?”

I glanced at him sideways and tapped my chin thoughtfully. Truthfully I wasn’t busy but his question meant that he wanted to chill. A light bulb went off in my head and I turned to smile at him slyly. He raised an eyebrow, and I wouldn’t be offended if he was a little scared. I tend to cause that reaction among my peers.

“Wait here,” I instructed, and turned, running.

“This is your brilliant idea?”

I swiveled and frowned at the flatness of his voice. I knew that he wasn’t going to be blown away, but would it kill him to show a little enthusiasm?

“What’s wrong with this?”

He stared at me for a moment before looking down at his orange suit. “Apart from the obvious?”

“It’s just neon orange,” I muttered. “And plus, we’re doing the world some good so be quiet and take it like a man.” I didn’t bother telling him that Avery would be here in thirty minutes or so. Then she’d see how amazing he was, volunteering on a weekend and doing the world some good.

Dale stared at the stick he was holding before grinning and stabbed nearby garbage and sticking it into his black garbage bag. “Maybe you’re right.”

“Maybe. The man says maybe.”

We worked in silence, each within our own thoughts. I actually liked picking up litter. It makes me mad that people just throw garbage whenever they please. Do they see me going into their home, drink my coffee, and throw the cup on their bed? Yeah, I didn’t think so. That’s exactly what they’re doing with mother Earth. Shoot.

“What’re you muttering about over there?” Dale called, his body half turned when I turned to look at him.

“Nothing,” I called back cheerily. I could almost picture him rolling his eyes, and when I turned back to look at him, he was heading towards me.

“So do you do this often?” he said, cleaning up around my area. I tried to not stare at him and focused on doing my job properly without drooling. Goodness, the man is in an atrocious neon orange jumper and I’m trying to stop myself from drooling.

There’s something wrong with me.

“Usually when I feel the need to do something besides homework or lounging around. I go and… do stuff.”

He quirked an eyebrow. “You mean volunteer?”

“Exactly.” I grinned at him. “Have you finished your forty hours of community service?”

“Believe it or not,” he said, “I’ve completed ‘round five hundred.”

I choked on my spit the moment his words registered in my brain. Whirling around, I searched his face to see if he was pulling my leg, but his grin was too boyish and honest and I just found myself trying to stop myself from swooning at the sight.

OK. There’s something seriously wrong with me right now.

“You’re crazy,” I finally said, showing him my shoulder.

He laughed. “No, I have a lot of free time during summer.”

“And you spend it volunteering?” I shook my head. “Sorry, it’s hard to imagine.”

He nudged my arm and I nearly stopped myself from tripping. He muffled his laughter and helped me upright. “Sorry. I volunteer at the hospital. They have this camp for the kids during summer and I go to pass time. You should come by, it’s pretty awesome.”

I smiled. “I’d like that.”

I don’t know how it happened, but the moment the words left my lips I felt the atmosphere shift and the air around us became charged. His expression was unreadable, and I was too into the moment to notice what I had on my face. All I knew was that I was hyper aware of the proximity of our bodies and the way his eyes were holding mine a little too intently.

Um, okay. It’s time to break the moment.

“Hey guys,” a melodious voice said right behind me. I froze, my back tensing, and the only thought that ran through my head was that she had perfect timing. I honestly don’t know whether I meant that in a good way or a bad way.

Let’s say the good way.

“Avery!” I turned around and was hyper aware of Dale’s hand still on my elbow. “Fancy meeting you here.”

She raised an eyebrow. “You told me to come.” She tilted her head slightly and smiled that heart-melting smile I knew every guy fell for. “Hi, Dale. I didn’t know you were going to be here.”

The smile on my face was a bit too wide, I told myself, but I couldn’t bring myself to rearrange my features. I had a feeling that if I dropped it, the next smile I’d try would look lopsided.

And then I caught the hidden message in her eye when she turned to look at me again. I vaguely wondered if she really was going to stab me with a toothpick. I think I deserved a better death than that, don’t you think?

“Now isn’t this going to be fun?” I exclaimed, turning around for the smirk I knew that would be on Dale’s face. I mean, I did this for him and his dumb plan. He should be happy that I went out for him!

And plus, I needed to look away from those murderous brown eyes. Oh, man, I could feel my skin prickling.

Hm. I wonder what would happen if I blurted out that I was dating Dale.

No. It’s too soon.

Smiling, I looked up at Dale, but was rather thrown when I saw him glancing to his side with an annoyed expression on his face. Jeez. I practically deliver what he wants on a silver platter and he looks annoyed?

I jabbed him at the side when Avery told us that she’d be back to switch clothing. “What’s wrong with you?” I hissed between clenched teeth. “I did this for you.”

He was silent.

What, is he deaf? “Dale!”

“I heard you,” he snapped. Affronted, I leaned back and narrowed my eyes in his direction. He averted his eyes, and that raised my suspicions. What’s wrong with him? He usually stared people down whenever he got the chance. It’s not that he does it on purpose, it’s just when he talks to you, or you tell him something, he focuses on you… like you’re the only person he sees.

I twitched, slapping myself and mused that it must be weird for him to talk to a guy that intensely.

But then I realized that I’m getting off topic.

“Sorry,” he muttered just as Avery reappeared in the same horrendous suit. She had her nose wrinkled cutely and I didn’t blame her. She was more stingy about clothing than I was.

I stayed silent when Dale looked at me to see if I heard. Blankly, I stared back at him before offering a shrug and nodded at Avery who already started working.

And finally, he smiled and that was enough.

It was mocking me and I couldn’t bare it. My hands inched to rip it to shreds - to - to - “This is so ugly!” I groaned, allowing my head to slam against the black desk in complete and utter pain. The textbook lay open in front of me and the package of work right on top. Begging to be destroyed first.

I marveled at the thought.

“Stop wishing death on the subject,” he drawled next to me. “It’s impossible, and you look insane right now, by the way.”

I stopped banging my head against the desk. “Shut up. Drop to a 53 average and tell me how you feel about that.”

He muffled his laughter. “C’mon, Kee, it’s not that hard.” I glowered at the nickname but didn’t say anything. Whatever, if he kept saying it, soontime I’d get used to it. Soon. “You need the gravitational potential energy to do this, remember?”

“I knew that.” What the hell did he just say?

He leveled an even look in my direction. “Do you know what that is?”

“Yes!” Indignantly, I squinted my eyes in his direction. How dare he think I’m stupid?

“What is it?” He leaned back, amusement playing across his face, as if he knew what my answer was.

I stared at him, frantically searching my mind. Gravitational… gravity, obviously. Um - 9.8... Something. Shit. Now he definitely knows I’m stupid.

“I don’t know,” I sighed, not caring that my pride was just thrown into the garbage.

He smirked before leaning forward and chucking me under the chin. Surprised, I gazed at him stupidly and took in his gorgeous features. “Was that so hard to say?”

What the hell - what the crap was he doing? Why was he being so nice?

Suddenly afraid, I inched back and nodded. “Um, no?”

…Why did I nod?

He lifted an eyebrow, but turned back to the papers in front of us. “It’s mass times gravity times height, by the way.”

Eg = mgh. Right.

“Tell me your average again,” I muttered, knowing that I was just purely torturing myself. Maybe my agony will somehow motivate me to get better marks. You know. Maybe.

He didn’t look up. “81 percent.”

My head met the desk again.

Books laid scattered around me. If you go to the very back of the library where no one ventures to because of excessive dust - yeah, you’d find me there. Chewing on the end of my pencil, to be more precise, you know, just in case you wanted to visit.

“Disgusting,” I muttered. “Who the hell needs to know the actual work of stacking books on top of each other?” Did I mention that I hated physics?

“I had a feeling that I’d find you here.”

I moaned, covering my face. “What’re you talking about? This is my space. You knew I’d be in the library, suffering…. I’m in agony.”

Avery laughed, pulling up a seat. “I think you’re over exaggerating.”

“I think you’re insane for thinking that I’m ‘over exaggerating’,” I replied politely. I scribbled some nonsense in my notebook and tried not to rip the sheet into shreds. I absolutely loathed it when I didn’t understand anything right away.

“So,” Avery said. I grunted in a non-feminine way, erasing a whole page of equations rapidly. I am never taking this ugly class again - “How’s the tutoring going?”

For a second I felt my heart stop. How did she know? Did Dale tell her? Was she supposed to know? I suddenly began to fear my life as I looked up slowly. She was staring at me calmly, a tiny smile quirking the ends of her lips, but I couldn’t tell what was going on in that head of hers.

“How’d you know?” I settled for a nonchalant, dry remark, brushing my paper clean.

There was a slight pause. “Dale told me.”

Ah! So he did tell her. Okay, that’s good. I think. I had a feeling that she controlled this conversation, however, and knowing that fact made me uneasy. Just a tad. “Yeah, we sort of have this weird deal going on,” I wrinkled my nose. “And before you ask, sorry, I can’t tell you.”

An amused smile stretched her lips. “Weird, huh?”

I nodded. “Yep. So, did he call you up?” Even though they stopped dating, they remained friends and Dale would call her every now and then to catch up.

“No. I called him.”

“Oh. Cool.” I pushed my Physics 11 away and took my biology textbook. “What’d you guys talk about?” I asked absentmindedly.

There was an odd tone in her voice. “You.”

It was a second until her response registered and I turned to her with an eyebrow raised. I hoped the fact that my heart was beating frantically didn’t show on my face and I tried to take even breaths.

Oh shit. Was she going to kill me now? At the back of the library? Alone?

“Oh yeah?” I squeaked. “Why?” They should be talking about each other! Not about me. What the hell is wrong with Dale, letting her take control of the conversation like that when he still wanted her?

Goodness. Frowning slightly, I rubbed my hand against my chest. That thought hurt, for some strange reason.

“I was just asking whether or not you guys chilled at school a lot,” she said, flipping through a random book on the table. I turned back to my work, allowing her words to wash over me. “I never knew you guys were good friends now. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Her voice was playful, but I detected an underlying hurt. Crestfallen, guilt began to chew me inside. I wanted to tell her everything, but I couldn’t.

“I didn’t think… you cared,” I muttered. “Sorry.”

“Oh.” She was quiet for a while. “Of course I care,” she said slowly. “You’re my best friend, aren’t you? Thick and thin, through everything; all that good stuff?”

I nodded. “Of course. Duh.”

“So do you like him?”

The question was so unexpected, I just looked at her in shock. She had her eyebrows raised, and a sort of calculating glint in her eyes made my back go cold. How could she twist the conversation like that to her advantage? How?

“What?” I finally breathed. “How could you say that?”

She shrugged. “Just asking. I mean, the man is hot, so, you know.”

I wrinkled my nose, feeling my chest go numb. “I don’t like people for their looks, Av.”

“Mhm.” She nudged me playfully. “Don’t lie, you can’t take your eyes off him.”

I couldn’t find words to deny it, and she chuckled knowingly. Still, I sat there, blankly trying to remember why on earth I was doing all this. Why would I tell her my feelings, just to lose our strong bond? Why would I hurt her? She trusted me. And Dale… I shook my head. Shit. I can’t do this anymore.

All because I didn’t like friggin’ ugly boy. This suddenly became… complicated.

I ran a hand over my face. “I’m not the one that still has feelings for him,” I was supposed to say jokingly, but my voice came out flat. I looked up, ready to apologize, but she looked at me and looked away in that familiar gesture I was so used to, that abruptly made me lose my breath.

“He’ll always have a special place in my life,” she finally said clearly: a warning. “It’s just… always been that way.”

Oh Dale… you already have her. Why do you need me for? “I know it has,” I said brightly, a false smile on my face. Now, I definitely knew I shouldn’t be choking on that lump in my throat. “Then why are you with ugly boy?”

She sort of smiled. “I like him, Kea.”

There was an exchange of unspoken words between us, and I knew it was in that moment that my heart broke for the first time.

I pursed my lips, tilting my head to one side. Oh, man, that bag was gorgeous. I wanted it. I needed to have it. I glanced at the contents of my wallet and groaned. “This is what happens when you don’t have a job,” I muttered to myself.

I finished six hours of teaching little kids, and now I’m on my way home. Correction, sorry, I was on my way home until I passed by… the most… gorgeous –

“I need a job,” I decided, nodding to myself. When I get home, I’ll sit in front of my computer and revise my crap resume. You do not want to know how many times I got rejected. I sighed. Now all I gotta do is save eighty bucks, still.

“Nice bag.” I felt my heart give an almighty pound. “You gon’ buy it or stare at it all day?”

I whirled around. “Don’t sneak up on people,” I managed to grit through my teeth and a bright smile. “What’re you doing here?”

He crossed his arms over his chest and raised an eyebrow. “It’s a mall, isn’t it? I came here to shop.”

I raised both my eyebrows apprehensively. “You shop?”

I stared at him until he cracked a smirk and shook his head. “Nah, I only came here to pick something up for my sister.” He gestured to the plastic bag he was holding. “What about you? Piano?”

“Yup. It got boring after the fourth kid, though.”

He chuckled. “I guess being a piano teacher isn’t in your future.”

I smiled faintly. “I guess so.” I looked away, pretending to be interested in the people passing by, when I was really thinking of different ways to excuse myself without being suspicious… or rude. But the latter wasn’t a necessity.

“So how are you?” he asked, subconsciously taking a step forward. I felt myself tense and my smile became anxious.

“I’m fine. How are you?” I said in my one-octave-higher polite tone, opposed to my normal voice. He noticed and tilted his head to one side, assessing me.

“You don’t sound fine,” he said. I glared a little and shrugged briskly. He didn’t need to know my inner musings. He didn’t need to know that I liked him and we had to stop this before it got worse.

OK. So he needed to know the last part, just not the first. I just don’t know how to tell him without sounding completely loony. I mean, the whole idea was loony, but it had a solid reason behind it. But now, I can’t even tell him why I want to back down - oh wait! Yes, I can, actually.

“I actually need to talk to you,” I said seriously, trying not to turn around and run for my life. Oh man. Face your fears, Kea! Shoot.

He nodded and gently took hold at my wrist and dragged me along. I tried not to flinch and settled on staring at the back of his head, drilling holes. I found myself in an ice cream parlor a few minutes later.

“Chocolate,” I answered when he asked the obvious question. He returned two minutes later with his own Cookies N Cream and took a seat opposite of me.

“So…”

“So…” I mimicked, licking off my cone. And then I realized that it was my cue. Ha. “Oh right! Sorry.” I stopped eating my treat and regarded him with a serious expression. I heard my pulse in my ear, and I felt a migraine coming on… How lovely. “So, uh, how’s school?”

I’m getting there. Just chill, I’m warming him up.

He shot me a strange look. “It’s alright.” Pause. “Are you high?”

I gaped before I threw bunched up napkins in his direction. “No! Goodness, Dale.” I shook my head. “I’m just asking out of the kindness and interest in my heart about your wellbeing. And then the man asks me if I’m high…” I sighed, trying not to burst out laughing.

Suddenly, I felt him sit in the seat next to me and his arm abruptly went around my waist. I literally froze.

“Oh, God.” Air escaped between my teeth and I slowly turned to face his smirking face. “Let. Me. Go.”

He applied pressure and I felt the torture. “Not until you tell me what’s going on.”

I bit the bottom of my lip to keep from laughing. “No.”

I felt his fingers wiggle and a giggle slipped. Soon, I was cackling and gasping for air like I haven’t had oxygen my whole life. I barely registered Dale’s wickedly amused grin as I collapsed on his chest and panted for breath. My whole face was red, still, because I knew that people were looking at me like I was a complete lunatic.

“That was unnecessary,” I managed, looking up with a bright smile.

He held my gaze, his eyes warm. I felt my whole body tingle, and my first thought was, Screw Avery. Screw the fact that I’m not his ‘type’. I have this moment to myself and she doesn’t need to know about it.

I averted my eyes from his and spotted the dimple on his left cheek. I grinned, “I like your dimple,” I said.

“Of course you do,” he said dryly. I pulled away from him nonchalantly, taking another lick from my surprisingly unharmed ice cream. I sighed happily, “I love chocolate.” I made a move to return the money, but he help his hand up and shook his head. I quirked an eyebrow, “Why?” and slowly retrieved the bill sitting between us.

“Just because.”

I looked at him sideways and saw him observing me, his head tilted. I matched his expression. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“Oh. Okay.”

But it wasn’t okay, because he wasn’t supposed to be staring that intensely in my direction. I tried to distract myself by finishing my ice cream and staring down the senior couple in the corner of the parlor. I felt a smile break out when I saw the man reach out to hold her hand from across the table.

“Did you see that?” I said in a whisper of awe. I felt my smile grow as I turned to him. “That was so heart melting.”

He followed the direction of my eyes. “That old couple?”

I nodded. “I want that.”

“Want what?”

“I want that kind of love where we grow old together but every day is like we’re falling in love all over again.” Abruptly after, I felt a mental kick. The only person I’ve ever told that to is Avery. I braced myself for his laugh, but when I heard nothing, I turned to him cautiously.

He was smirking a little, leaning back into his chair casually. My breath caught at the scene and I sighed inwardly. He was too beautiful. I laughed inwardly at the thought.

“Where’s the insult I’m waiting for?” I piped.

He shrugged, “No insult.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

I smiled at him whilst he continued to smirk. We probably looked odd, sitting and staring at each other. Finally, I looked away to hide the wide smile tugging my lips.

“I should go,” I said, making a move to stand up. He grabbed my hand, just like that.

“Let me take you home,” he said.

I didn’t bother disguising my smile this time. “Mr. Chivalry, eh?”

He flashed a charming smile over his shoulder and I melted in my shoes. Oh, man. “Maybe I just wanted to hold your hand.”

My jaw dropped and I felt my face flame. “That’s a line, if I ever heard one,” I muttered, but I can’t lie, I was gassed. I couldn’t stop myself from shaking. Yeah, I shake whenever I’m really wound up. And his words were wounding me up tight.

“Maybe,” he said, squeezing my hand a little.

I shook my head, my eyes warm. He casually looked over his shoulder, but his eyes weren’t on me, but over me. Puzzled, I watched him look straight ahead before I looked over my shoulder myself.

Through my fuzzy vision, I managed to make out the one person I tried to forget whenever I was with Dale… even though she was the only reason I was with Dale.

She was looking right at me with an unreadable look, before she looked away. Abruptly, I realized exactly why he was acting like this. His only reason for acting like this. I slowly looked at our connected hands and felt my throat clog along with the pressure behind my eyes.

I’m so stupid.

No. I was pissed.

I slammed my locker shut, taking in a calm breath. I tried reminding myself that yes, I let Dale use me. I allowed him to treat me like a rag doll to get to my best friend so I could be free from ugly boy talk. Dale was the only person I’ve approved of - and now I know why. I winced, tugging my bag.

“Hey.”

I didn’t stop walking, clenching my teeth together. There was silence - startled, I’m sure - before footsteps pounded after me. He got in front of me, walking backwards, uncaring if he were to bump into someone or not.

“Kee?”

I brushed by him. “Don’t call me that.”

“What the fu - Kee!” He caught up to me again and I groaned inwardly. I hated confrontations. I sensed one heading in my direction and I braced myself. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I said in a tone that said otherwise. I couldn’t help but give him a mean, bitch look before looking away like he meant nothing to me. “Nothing at all.”

“Bullshit,” he snapped, abruptly grabbing my wrist. I felt my heart jump to my throat. “We were good yesterday. What did I do?”

I give him that he catches on quick, but that’s all I’m ever gon’ give him because I, honestly, did not feel like talking to him today. I nursed a broken heart last night, and damn it, I’d rather not do it again.

I frowned a little. Not that I’m over it, but still. I probably do owe him an explanation…

I looked at his impatient slash frustrated face, but I caught genuine concern in his eyes. He honestly didn’t know what he did. What he’s doing to me. I sighed. Maybe it’s just my fault. Still, someone should’ve warned me.

“Nothing. Never mind. Sorry.” I walked passed him.

There was silence, but I felt him right next to me, and my chest began to hurt again. This was so ugly. Why the crap did I have to fall for the one person off limits? Why? Well, maybe if I had no morals; if I didn’t care what Avery thought, or even felt. But I do, because she meant a lot to me, and… and…

I shook my head. That’s the problem: I do care. I’d have to be the bitch of bitches to not care, but I’m not. So I turned to him and forced myself to look right into his eyes.

“We can’t do this anymore,” I said.

He stopped walking and gave me a strange look, like he heard me, but he didn’t believe the words coming out of my mouth. “Do what?”

I realized that I sounded like I was breaking up with him, and a tiny smirk tugged my lips. “Pretend-date.”

He regarded me with a look I didn’t understand. “We didn’t even tell her.”

“She knows,” I pointed out. Avery wasn’t stupid.

A reluctant smirk tugged his lips. “So you’re breaking up with me.” It was more of a statement than a question.

“Just a tad,” I answered nonchalantly, even though I was anything but. “Disappointed that your plan didn’t follow through?”

He shrugged. “I got what a needed,” he said. I allowed his words to sink in, and I barely stopped myself from slapping my face.

“Oh yeah?” I managed through a strangled voice.

“Yeah.”

We began walking to class again. Goodness.

“Kee?”

“It’s Kea. And yeah.”

He obviously ignored me. “I lied. I didn’t get what I wanted.”

My breath caught and I released a long sigh. “Let me guess,” I said wryly, keeping my expression controlled. “You need one last favour.”

He smiled a charming grin and threw an arm over my shoulder. I eyed it with distaste, when all I frankly wanted him to do was wrap his arms around my whole body in an intimate embrace -

I slapped myself inwardly. No need to be borderline creepy, Kea.

“I’m glad you understand,” he said.

All I could do was nod because I had nothing to say to make the ache in my chest go away.

“I see her,” I hissed, before a green leaf abruptly jumped back to position, successfully blocking our target. “Damn it!”

“…What’re you doing?”

I glanced behind me to see his bemused expression, staring right at me. I gaped before my hand shot out and pulled him behind me.

“What am I doing, what are you doing? You’re out in the open!”

“It’s better than crouching behind a plant like a psycho.”

I stopped at that, taking in my position. I was at the mall, stalking Avery, behind a large green plant…. For a second I pondered that and made a mental image that managed to make me bark a laugh.

“Shut up. You asked for this so I’m helping you. It’s this or nothing.”

He sighed. “Whatever you say. Just a warning, security might become a tad bit suspicious.”

I grinned over my shoulder. “Just a tad.” I turned back to look at the store she went in just in time to see her come out. “She’s out! OK, now you follow my lead, got that?”

He nodded once. “Gottem.”

I sharply stood up and walked from behind the plant as casually as I could. I heard Dale come beside me and I led us into a crowded area, just in front of the other store Avery entered.

“So what’s the master plan?” he said, his breath a caress on my ear. I ignored the tingly feeling.

“We… follow her.” I stopped, trying to block his bewildered expression. It’s better than it sounds, goodness. “And then you just trust me in after that, got it?”

He held my gaze, his expression clearly telling me that he didn’t believe that this was going to work, but he nodded all the same. “Sure. Whatever.”

I glared at him. “Whatever? Is that all you can say? I’m helping you, and all you can say is whatever?” I pinned him with another dark look before casually shrugging. “It’s good. It’s good.”

He grinned. “Hm.”

I observed him for a moment. “You’re acting a little bit weird.”

He rocked on his heels, his hands in his pockets and it reminded me of a little boy. I smiled at the thought. “Weird, huh?”

“Yeah. Weird, like - ” I glanced behind me and nearly threw myself to the ground. “Oh, God, it’s her!”

“Um… Kea?”

I froze, my left leg hovering over the ground before I slowly lowered it. I saw Dale coughing violently in a (futile) attempt to conceal his laughter. I accepted my fate and turned around.

“How did I get here?” I exclaimed, gazing at Avery like I haven’t seen her in my life. “Uh, for the record, it was his idea.” I pointed at Dale who suddenly had his jaw hanging open.

“You told me to follow your lead,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Remind me to never listen to you when you say that.”

“It was going brilliantly until you started talking,” I muttered.

“What’re you two talking about?” Avery asked. I looked at her blankly and realized that she had absolutely no idea what we were talking about. The plan’s still a go, then! Alright, back to my place.

“I came to find you, actually,” I said, hooking arms with my best friend. She gazed at me confusedly and looked at Dale for help, but he was just as lost as she was. Not that I was making it up as went along, or anything. There was a lot of thought put into this. Sort of.

What was I talking about? I wondered inwardly.

“You did?” she said, her voice so pretty and melodious, opposed to the normal tone she used with me. I wanted to strangle her for alternating her personality whenever a boy was around. It made me so mad.

“Yeah,” I said brightly. “I wanted your input on something.”

“Oh. Then… why is Dale here?”

I blanked out for a moment. Why was Dale here, then? But then I realized that his presence could be used as advantage in this unplanned plan!

“Oh.” I threw in a light laugh. “We bumped into each other and he suggested that we shop together.”

Avery’s eyebrows drew together, glancing between us, and nodded a little. “OK.”

With an inward twinge, I realized that she was slightly pissed and hurt, but I plowed on. I had no idea if I was going to regret this. Oh, God. Oh, crap. Here goes nothing.

“Um,” I pretended to look embarrassed, “actually, this is kind of serious. Sort of.”

I casually glanced at Dale and his dark eyes made me flinch. Why the crap was he staring at me so damn hard? I was helping him out, gosh. Well, whatever. He can thank me later with four bars of Aero. Ha.

“Yeah?” she said, her eyes on mine unblinkingly.

I grabbed Dale’s hand and tried not to revel in the way his hand enclosed over mine protectively and warmly and… damn. This was harder than I thought.

“We like each other.” I felt my chest tense, wondering what her reaction would be. “Just a tad.”

Her face was now blank. “Just a tad, huh?” I nodded silently. “OK,” was what she said.

I had a feeling she‘d say that.

“OK?” I echoed, uncertain, trying not to fidget under her gaze. She shrugged nonchalantly, and I knew that she was giving me the cold shoulder she always used to tell me about. All those times I asked her why she was being such a bitch for ignoring her friends like that, her boyfriend… but it was never me. Not until now.

“Yeah. OK.”

“You aren’t… mad?”

“No.” Her tone said otherwise. “Why would I be mad? If you like each other, then good. It doesn’t matter. I already said what I thought about you guys, but obviously, you decided to ignore me. But it’s your choice.”

I tried not to flinch at her words. Even though I was faking this, I never knew it’d hurt so much.

“Oh,” I said in a tiny voice. It wasn’t hard to fake. I felt Dale’s hand tighten around mine, and I leaned towards him for whatever comfort I could find.

But suddenly, he ripped away from me.

He wasn’t looking at me, but glancing at Avery, to his side, and back to her. I felt myself hold my breath. “I can’t do this anymore,” he muttered. He ran a hand through his hair. When he looked at me, his expression was torn. “Not like this.”

What?

“I don’t like her,” he said to Avery. “I… don’t.”

I released my breath.

“I’ll talk to you later,” he threw over his shoulder; to who, I didn’t know.

There was silence between us, even when my breathing suddenly became loud in my ears. Avery looked uncomfortable, shaken, and a little smug. But sympathy overpowered everything else, and even through my misery, I was slightly glad that I still had a best friend in someone who could be so cruel to me.

I felt my throat close, and I was very sure that my eyes would become blurred. It didn’t go as planned, but it looked like he would get what he wanted. Even though it wasn’t my way, I mused to myself, trying not too reach and touch my cheeks.

“I’d appreciate it if you don’t say I told you so,” I broke the silence.

Avery laughed a little; breathless, relieved, and sad. “Then I won’t, babe.” She put her arm around me and I swallowed hard to keep from sobbing.

“What’d you get?”

I looked up at the sound of a voice and immediately looked away back to my test. “Oh… 80 percent.” Uncomfortable, I picked at my sheet and tensed when he pulled up a stool next to me. “Thanks for tutoring me,” I said eventually.

There was a painful silence, and, “You’re welcome.”

I nodded and smiled at the spot next to him and stood up, walking away without a backward glance.

When I opened my locker, a bright assortment of flowers greeted me from the top shelf. I felt my heart stop as I reached forward and touched the four bars of Aero tucked in the bouquet.

How’d he know?

“Oh, good, you got them.” I looked at Dale’s younger sister in ninth grade. I smiled at her in greeting automatically, but she was observing me with a troubled expression. “Are you mad at Dale?”

Taken aback, I shook my head. “No.” Maybe, maybe not. Who knows now. “Why’d he get me these?” I asked, touching them again in reluctant awe.

The younger pretty girl smiled. “He told me to tell you, just because.”

I made a reach for the chips on the top shelf, but grunted in annoyance when my hand barely grazed it. “Just show your parents,” I said into the phone tucked between my shoulder and ear. “What’s the worse they could do?”

We both took it in.

“Never mind,” I muttered. Avery laughed.

“My point exactly. But they know I have my progress report… and I’ve been stalling for a week. I went from getting 95 averages to 57. To a 57! Can you believe that?!”

“So? I went from… oh never mind. You got it worse.”

“I hate you.”

I laughed. “Ew, I’m still failing with a 69 average.”

“It’s higher than 57! Ugh.”

“That’s your fault,” I shrugged, finally snagging the bag of chips. I smirked in triumphant and tore it open, stuffing a good handful in my mouth. “Anyway, all you’re gon’ be is grounded for how long and cut off from the outside world…” My words were hard to make out through the crunching of chips. “There’s no other way.”

“That’s not very helpful,” she said sourly. “You don’t know my pain.”

“Hey, I got the guilt trip and a lecture. It’s just as effective. I‘m studying without them telling me to. What‘s wrong with that picture?”

She laughed. “Fine, we’re in deep.”

I grinned just as the doorbell rang. “Exactly. Oh, the door bell rang.” I glanced at the clock. “Mum said the TV guy was coming in thirty minutes but the man’s early.” I sighed. “Oh, man. I haven’t watched TV in so long.”

“I don’t watch TV.”

“That’s how you know you’re deprived.”

I ran to the door and adjusted my sweatpants and shirt to look a little decent. Clearing my throat, I pulled the door open with a bright smile. “Hi, I hope the ride was…” My voice died into nothing, and I heard Avery on the other line asking me if the man was hot because I was speechless. Then she laughed. But I was barely paying attention.

Dale was standing there on my porch with his hands in his pocket, staring at me in determination. Why do I get the feeling that I wasn’t going to like what was coming up?

“Kee?”

I swallowed, my grip tightening on the doorknob. “Um, can I call you back, Av?”

“Sure! Tell me all about it.” She giggled. “Bye, love.”

I pressed the off button and felt myself tensing, bracing myself from the confrontation. Oh, craaap. I was not ready for this. I wasn’t even dressed for this. I fixed a smile on my face, pulling the door wider. “Hey, Dale…” I racked my brain. “What brings you to this part of the… neighbourhood?” Oh please. The man lived twenty minutes from me, and he didn’t even live around here.

“I really hate confrontations,” he muttered, shaking snow from his head. I quirked an eyebrow.

“Oh yeah? Me too. So maybe we can avoid this one - ” I said hurriedly, but was interrupted.

“Who says we’re having one?”

I narrowed my eyes. “You just said - ”

“Maybe I just wanted to share that piece of information.” A hint of a cheeky smile peeked and I looked away.

“Sure. So. Confrontation?”

“Out here?”

I crossed my arms over my chest. “No one said I had to be nice,” I said. “You take what you can get.”

He ruffled his hair and blew out a sigh. “I guess I had that coming.”

“Damn straight.” My jaw clenched. “What the hell, Dale?” was basically what I could come up in the moment caught off guard. Dale’s jaw tightened and he looked away, and the playfulness that was there a moment ago disappeared before my eyes.

“I have an explanation for that,” he muttered.

I felt the hurt and anger resurfacing and I was so very tempted to slam the door in his face. “It better be good. I had everything planned out. I agreed to help you one last time, and then you turn around and slap my face!”

“I did not slap your face.” He looked offended that I even suggested that. I almost laughed.

“Not literally, you cow,” I hissed.

“And you didn’t have everything planned out,” he said, his eyes locking with mine.

I stopped at that, my jaw dropped in incredulity. I help him out, and he - he - “Excuse you,” I practically yelled. “I did. How the hell would you know when you stopped me right in the middle?!” I slapped his chest in indignation. “I mean, okay, you got what you wanted, and I’m happy for you and crap, but seriously.” I grinded my teeth. “Did you have to snub me in the process?”

He looked partially ashamed, but his eyes were vivid with something I couldn’t identify. “Trust me,” he said. “I didn’t mean to hurt you - ”

“You didn’t,” I said for the sake of my pride.

“ - or embarrass you in front of your fucking god.”

I stared at him, my eyes wide. I didn’t know whether it was because he swore - he never swore - or because he used God in the same sentence. But then his sentence registered and I blanked for a moment.

“What are you going on about?” I shook my head, as if he were insane. I didn’t doubt the thought right now.

He looked slightly pissed off and frustrated. “I’m talking about Avery.”

There was a sense of foreboding going on, but I didn’t pay attention. “What about her?”

He looked at me, almost mockingly, yet irritated. “At first I thought that I was imagining it, but now I can see it a mile from where I’m standing.” He made no sense to me. But I narrowed my eyes all the same in caution. “You try so hard.”

“For what?”

He made gestures I didn’t understand before his arms fell to his sides. “You try so hard to impress Avery. You always want her approval, her say in everything… If she doesn’t want something, you don’t either. If she tells you to jump off a cliff, you probably would with good persuasion.”

“What the hell - ” I began.

“No, you’re going to listen to me.” He took a step forward. “You’re like her shadow.” All air escaped my lungs and I stared at him, unguarded hurt all over my face. I didn’t have time to process my emotions because he was bringing them all out so fast.

“No, I’m not,” I managed to say, my voice lacking in conviction, because I was confused as to why he was saying all this in the first place, and second, because maybe he was right, just a tad, that I thought what he said was true.

“She’s smarter than you, prettier than you, and luckier than you,” he plowed on mercilessly.

I tried to laugh him off mockingly, but nothing could get passed my throat. So I balled my hands into fists and waited for him to finish.

“She always gets what she wants and she doesn’t care about you.”

I stopped biting the insides of my cheeks. “Are you done?” I demanded, my face pinched. “Because I think that this is the perfect time to tell you that that’s complete - ”

“Complete what?” he challenged, taking another step forward. I felt the pressure behind my eyes and I knew that I would be sobbing at his feet if I didn’t slam the door in his face now.

“Complete…” I shook my head, my throat clogged so I tried swallowing hard. “You know, if you came here to hurt me some more, then I want you to know that you’re fucking destroying me.” My voice broke at the end.

“You think that’s true, all that shit I said?” he said, staring right at me. “You think that you are her shadow, that you can’t be better than her because, what, you think she’s prettier than you?”

I didn’t know how it happened, but the next thing I knew, my right hand was burning and my eyes found his cheek tingeing pink.

A sob escaped my throat, unchecked. “If you didn’t like me, Dale, just don’t talk to me. Don’t go out of your way to come here and - and - ” The dam broke and I pressed my hand against my mouth to keep him from hearing the pain that he caused.

I took a stumbling step back just as he straightened himself.

“Well, you’re wrong,” he practically spat.

I looked at him through my blurred vision and saw him scowling at the sky before his eyes landed on me, an unreadable expression settling on his face when he caught the tears in my eyes.

He reached over to touch my face, but I roughly avoided his hand. A frustrated look crossed his face and he glared at nothing.

“You’re wrong.”

“About what?”

We stood there, looking at each other, and even though we were only a few feet apart, I felt so far away from him. I could reach forward and touch him: slap him, hold him, cling to him; anything I wanted. But we still wouldn’t feel each other. “You’re not second best like you think you are. She’s not prettier than you because you’re beautiful. You think that she’s smarter than you but…” he shook his head. “You’re the only person I know who tries so hard to prove everyone wrong even when you’re doubting yourself.

“I admire you, Kee.” His face softened as he said this, but his eyes hardened in a split second. “But if you’re clouded by all that stupidity that you supposedly believe, then you won’t see the truth.”

“What truth?” I growled through my clogged throat. Fury shook my body, and inside, I felt overwhelmed. The temptation to turn and close this conversation - no, argument - was a large one. “Because that’s a load of bull coming from you.”

His jaw clicked. “How?”

“I don’t know where you’re coming from, or why, and it’s not even about me. It’s about you and Avery. It’s always been that way, for me, because she knows you. She knows you. I don’t. You dedicated a song for her on the radio, for crap sake,” I shook my head roughly. “So all the things you’re saying, you’re supposed to be walking that way.” I pointed to the left in the direction of Avery’s house. “Not in front of my house.”

“That was before. Everything changed.”

My breath caught. “Oh, don’t even,” I whispered.

He stared at me unblinkingly, his face bold and rebellious.

Now empty inside, I looked down at my sock covered feet. “I think you should go now,” I said, voice detached.

There was a second pause, before, “Kea,” he said, so much emotion packed into my word; my name, that I started to choke all over again. I shook my head roughly and shut the door in his face.

This was the ugliest of ugly. Depressed, I sighed and averted my eyes from my textbooks. I couldn’t find the heart to study like mad. I had a math test on Monday and I do not understand anything in the whole chapter. I was so screwed.

I flipped the beginning of the chapter and exhaled. “OK. OK, focus.”

Ten seconds later, I started to feel my eyelids close. Great.

“Maybe next time,” I grunted, grabbing all my stuff. Just as I stepped out of the library, my cell phone began to vibrate. Twitching, I fished it out of my pocket and said, “Hello?” without checking the caller ID.

“I talked to Dale,” were the words that greeted me.

I nearly tripped on air. “Okay…?” I said uncertainly, because was I supposed to care that she spoke to him? Obviously I have some negative feelings towards them, but Avery didn’t need to know that.

“He told me the weirdest things, you know.” Her voice was nonchalant, but I’ve known her for years, and I could hear the underlying threat. “He started yelling.”

I stopped walking. “Oh. Uh, I thought Dale never yelled at you.”

“I know, right? That’s why I got so pissed off when he started going off about… get this, me taking advantage of you? Isn’t that completely whack?”

“What?” I said automatically. What the hell? “What are you talking about?”

“He said that I don‘t treat you proper - like a best friend should. That I boss you around.” There was a pause this time. “I don’t. …Do I?”

I made a face at the snow and scoffed. “What is he talking about?”

“I don’t know.” Her voice was distant this time. Uncomfortable, I played with the snow on my boot and listened to her speak. “But something that he said really bothered me.”

“Oh yeah?” I said. “What is it?”

“That… that if you like someone that I should just let it go.”

I felt myself go taut. “Let what go?”

“Kea?” Her voice was solemn.

“Yeah?”

“Do you like Dale?”

I stayed silent, trying to think of proper ways to deny her words, even when they were burning the truth. Instead, I massaged my forehead and didn’t bother lying. I was too tired of lies. “Yeah, Av, I like him. We had this deal going on that I would help him get with you because he still liked you, but ugly boy was in the way. So I thought, why not? I liked Dale enough and…” I sighed. “Sorry, Av.”

I waited for the inevitable cold shoulder.

“Oh.”

Great. “I can’t stop,” I told her matter-of-factly. “But I won’t talk to him.”

“No. Whatever. Do what you want.”

Jaw slacked and helpless, I stared at nothing. “Avery! What the hell, I just told you I wouldn’t do anything.”

“No, I’m not stopping you, am I? If you really like him then go ahead. Follow your heart and all that crap.” I heard annoyance and hurt in her words and I groaned.

“Av, don’t be like this.”

“I thought you would never get at my ex boyfriends?”

“It’s not like I planned it!” I practically yelled, appalled by her words. “I didn’t tell the man to stare at me so damn hard, or to be so chivalrous or - or -”

“I know, Kea. I dated him, remember?”

Fury pumped through my veins. I didn’t know if I was hurt or so angry by her words. How the-hell-dare she use this holier-than-thou tone? “I know.”

“OK.”

She hung up, and blankly, I looked down at my cell phone. I shut my eyes tightly. Screw her. She steps on me like I’m dirt, not her best friend.

Only sometimes. And that’s when I remember that we have too many good memories together.

But still…. Maybe Dale was right. Maybe. Even so, I gave a muted cry of vehemence and kicked the snow. Goodness.

I slammed my books on the table. Determination was coursing through me and I knew that I better taken advantage of this moment because - honestly - me, confident? “We need to talk,” I said.

Dale looked up in surprised shock when I appeared in front of him out of no where. Not to mention the level of my voice. I managed to bribe everyone out of the library with my all my stash of chocolate bars. Do you see the extremes I’m going for this man?

He was now calmly assessing me. “Oh yeah?”

I narrowed my eyes. “Yeah.”

“Bout what?” He casually twirled his pencil between his fingers and leaned back against his seat. I had the biggest urge to run away.

I grabbed the last ounce of courage within me before it disappeared. “Avery. You. Me. Us.”

That caught his attention. I don’t think he expected me to admit a declaration (no matter how pathetic) like that any time soon. He stopped twirling his pencil and stared at me right in the eye. “Oh really?” he said.

It felt as if I were being burned alive. This was worse than presenting a fifteen minutes speech on income tax; and trust me, I would know. “Yes.”

His face was deprived of its usual teasing expression. I understood that the ball was on my side of the court, but really, no one said that he had to stare that hard.

I fidgeted, and then decided to do this standing up, so I stood up from my seat that I had roughly sat on. My hands twisted in front of me as I fought to find the right words.

“What you said…” I started, “and what Avery said - and what I was thinking - but it was mostly -” I stopped and sighed, frustrated. “I’m not very good at this.”

“No, go on,” he said softly, his voice compelling; as if I never said anything now, he’ll never get the chance to hear what’s on my mind. And in a way, it was right. If I didn’t say anything now, I would never find the guts to say it ever again.

I ran a hand through my hair. “You were right.”

I waited for the I-told-you-so speech. I had really bad pride issues, so this was clearly a huge step for me. I felt so very vulnerable, standing in front of him, about to tell him something that I would’ve kept to myself, except it was too big, and too strong to be contained.

Pathetic. That’s how I felt like right now.

When I didn’t hear anything, embarrassment began to claw at me. I chanced a peek at where he was sitting - only to discover the seat empty. My jaw dropped.

“When I get my hands on him…” Mortification didn’t even begin to describe it.

There was a deep, throaty chuckle behind me and I jumped. “Maybe you should look at my face when you’re talking to me,” he suggested lightly.

I quickly glanced at his faintly amused eyes and strained a chortle. “Haha… yeah…” I cleared my throat and tried to take a step back, but the blasted chair was in the way. “So.”

“So?” He crossed his arms over his chest. I leveled a stare at his chest, and blankly noted how short I was compared to him. Curse my genes.

“So this is really awkward,” I finally admitted, my arms crossed in front of my, as if protecting me.

“Heh, just a tad.” He quirked an eyebrow when I looked up at his choice of words and I smiled lightly. “Hey, Kee,” he said, his voice quiet; it was so unlike him. I automatically glanced at his face. “Our conversation…” he said. “I - I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“You didn’t,” I said automatically because of my pride. And when he stared at me I wrinkled my nose and sighed. “I mean, it’s okay. I know where you’re coming from, and I know what… you said was right.” I bit my lip, feeling my dignity cripple. But this was much more important than that. He was more important than that. “It just - stung.” More like unbearable pain.

He looked away and I couldn’t stand it anymore.

“Avery’s my best friend, Dale,” I said. “I value her opinion.”

He looked at me; stared right into my eyes. “Even when she doesn’t value yours?”

Ouch. “Yeah.”

He half smiled. “You’re too good of a friend.”

“And that’s a bad thing?”

He sighed. “Sometimes, Kee. Sometimes you have to realize that this is the way things are supposed to be. The way they’re meant to be.”

“Ever heard of making your own destiny?” I challenged.

“You’re stubborn,” he observed, and then he shrugged. “I guess if you feel that way -” Suddenly he took a step forward, erasing the space between us; and automatically causing me to take a step back. But the chair was still there, unfortunately, and I stumbled backwards.

His arm snaked around my waist.

I could barely get the words out. “What’re you doing?”

“You got that look on your face,” he said casually, like he wasn’t all up in front on my personal space. I tried being discreet by leaning backwards; I felt like I was going to combust any moment now. I was dying here. Dying.

“What look?” I said distractedly, looking everywhere but at him. Why did I make everyone leave? Why?

“Like you don’t believe what‘s happening is happening.”

I felt my heart stopped and looked at him; really looked at him. He eyes were penetrating and I felt uncomfortable, like he could read my every thought. And right now, it felt like he was.

“How did you… know that?” I said uncomfortably.

He chuckled. “You’re not all that hard to read. I watch you, Kee. Your emotions are out for the world to see.”

I observed him blankly, furiously working overtime to try and ignore my heart trying to jump out of my ribcage, or my legs, telling me to run for my life. I was tempted though, I can’t lie.

I inched away from him. “You’re a creeper, Dale.”

His laugh was unexpected. “No.” He shook his head, smiling. “I don’t watch people too often. Only when they have my attention.”

“Ooh.” I guess that made sense.

He looked at me meaningfully. “Like when you’re upset with someone or something you tend to call them ‘ugly’. Or your choice of a snack is anything to do with chocolate. Or the fact that you want to be a doctor and prove everyone wrong, and that you can make it.”

I couldn’t breathe. No. I’m going into respiratory arrest.

I couldn’t stand looking into his eyes, either.

“And when people look too long into your eyes, you tend to look away.” His voice was amused. But then his voice lowered and took a more meaningful tone. “And that you think you’re always second best, that you’ll never be good enough -”

I finally remembered how to breathe. “I think we went through this,” I said and cleared my throat. “I… get it.”

“And what is there to get?”

I looked up blankly, to suddenly see his determined gaze. “What?”

“Do you understand?”

“Understand… what?”

He groaned.

And then - then he kissed me.

The moment it registered that his lips were on mine, I pulled away and tried to put as much distance as possible between us. By doing so, I crashed into the chair behind me and tumbled to the floor. Yes, I was the queen of grace.

“Are you okay?” he said, stifling his laughter. I glared at him from the ground, my whole face burning, my body burning, and I just really needed a cold glass of water - preferably now, to splash it into his face.

“Do I look okay?” I couldn’t help but snap, but almost immediately I relented. “Sorry, I’m - I’m okay. I tripped.”

“You crashed,” he told me and effortlessly pulled me to my feet. I made a face at his tone and rubbed the back of my neck. He was looking at me in amusement. “Girls usually kiss me back, not try to run for their life.”

Oh, my goodness. Kill me now. Lightning, bullets, an axe murderer - anything to get me out of this humiliating moment. God, please; I know you exist. “Er - ” I attempted to push him away in a swift movement, but his hand immediately closed around my wrists. Oh, crap. “If you hadn’t noticed,” I said, my voice unnaturally high, “I’m not like most girls.”

“Of course you’re not,” he said and smirked. “Most girls would stop thinking about their best friends at this point and cave. You’re not.”

He was right. I nodded and looked down. I heard his sigh over my head and then I felt his hands release my wrists and his arms wound around my whole body. I stiffened, but he only tightened his grip in response.

“Don’t run away,” he said.

“Even if I wanted to,” I said, my voice muffled, “I can’t.”

“Point taken.”

And so, we stood like that, him hugging me, and me not really registering the fact that he was hugging me. I mean, really, for all I knew I could have fallen on my desk whilst studying - or I’m dreaming in my comfy bed right this instant.

“Dale?”

“Hm?” He was absentmindedly playing with my hair and I felt butterflies burst in my stomach.

“Did you really talk to Avery?”

He didn’t stop his hand movements but I felt his muscles go taut. I unconsciously buried my face into his shoulder, and immediately felt stupid for doing that. Oh, God, but he’s not letting go. Don’t panic. Don’t panic.

“Yeah.” He blew out air. “I did.”

“You didn’t have to,” I said, my voice a neutral tone. I tried to forget that she was really mad at me. “We’re always good with each other.”

“Only because -”

I looked up at him with a mini glare. “Do not even go there. Let’s just - ” I broke off when I saw the librarian glaring at us from where she stood at the door. I began to inch away from Dale - what if she told my parents? - but he didn’t realize exactly who was in the room and what she was capable of.

“Dale,” I hissed.

“What?”

“Let me go.”

“Why?”

I jabbed him and wrenched out of his grip, but her voice was faster.

“Excuse me, PDA is not permitted on school grounds.” Her voice was icy and I felt a chill run down my spine. “You shouldn’t even be engaging in this type of activity.”

Really God. Honestly. Please - I don’t mind mercy killing! I cowered behind Dale who didn’t seem affected. I was the one muttering apologies and hastily gathering my books. Why, why, why did I do this again?

“What activity?” Dale said. “We were just hugging.”

“Didn’t look that way to me.”

He smiled charmingly. “Alright, miss, but you gotta understand where I’m coming from. She looks adorable when she’s confused and - ”

“Dale!” I said, scandalized. My face was red, I knew it was. I smacked his arm (inflicting pain upon my self in the process) and smiled nervously at the librarian. “I’m sorry, miss, this will never happen again.” I stopped myself in time from blurting something stupid along the lines of “please don’t tell my parents!”.

The blonde teacher sniffed. “All right, head for lunch. If I see you two touching hands, you’ll be down to the principal’s office!”

I nodded furiously, and darted out of the library like I was on fire. I leaned against the wall at the corner of the library, feeling my face. “Most… embarrassing… moment…”

I wanted to go to sleep. Forget this ever happened.

Dale materialized beside me, laughing his ass off. I glared at him and practically threw all my books at his head. “This is your fault!” I fumed. I mean, okay, he can go and get himself in trouble; why would I care? But dragging me along?!

“How is it my fault?” he said, sighing; a smile was still stretching his lips. “Oh man, that was too funny, too funny. You should’ve seen your face.”

“I prefer not to.”

“Aw, c’mon, Kee, you angry?” He smiled cheekily. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise. Three Kit Kat bars ?” He dug in his backpack, and lo and behold, the red bars were shining in my face. I practically drooled.

“Fine.” I snatched the bars before he could make me beg. “But only because I’m low on supplies.”

I couldn’t stop staring. I knew that my face was blank, and I probably looked stupid, but honestly, my face felt numb.

“Kee?”

I looked up from his outstretched hand to his face with an eyebrow raised quizzically. “Um… yes?”

“It’s for you,” he repeated, glancing curiously from the gift bag to my face. “Are you constipated?”

My jaw dropped automatically and I glared at the smirk on his face. I snatched the bag from his hand and ignored his chortles. “You know, my birthday isn’t for another two months. It’s not Christmas, Valentines…” I wrinkled my nose, my eyes appraising him with caution. “Are you… okay?”

He rolled his eyes. “Just open it.”

I ruffled the tissue paper blocking the view of the bag and felt shock register. “It’s the purse!” Frantically, I glanced at him and saw him smiling. The next second, I flung the gift bag at him like it was on fire. “I can’t accept that!”

He groaned, rubbing his chest. I sort of did hit him hard. Sort of. “And why the hell not?”

I inched away. “It’s eighty bucks. I - I don’t know when I’ll be able to pay you back and -”

He started laughing. I stopped. In fact, he was laughing so hard that he had to lean against the wall for support. What the crap was he laughing for?

He straightened after he noticed my deadly stare and calmly shoved the bag right into my face. I actually stumbled backwards. What a cow. I swear, if I get a nose bleed…

“It’s a gift,” he said. “I wanted to buy it for you.”

My gaze was blankly curious. “Why?”

“You’re an idiot if you hadn’t figured it out by now.” He snorted, arms crossed over his chest. And if I leaned to my right a little, I could make out a group of girls staring at him and whispering to each other. What were they looking at? Just because his hair was perfectly messy - I still laughed at him for that, even though I do secretly admire it myself - or the fact that he was wearing a white polo shirt that beautifully outlined his broad shoulders -

“Gah! Get away from me, you’re driving me crazy!” I slapped my hands over my ears and stalked away from him. I cannot believe that I allowed myself to think about him on that level.

I can still hear his voice - all his words, his expressions - and oh, God. That kiss. It was so hard not to think about it when I have nothing else to think about - like now.

“I’m completely mad,” I decided. I hastened my steps, somehow knowing that he was right behind me. He managed to catch me on my break during my volunteer hours. It’s a wonder how he even knew I was at the mall. I mean, it’s not like Avery and I were on speaking terms.

Oh, God. My best friend wasn’t speaking to me because I happened to fall for her (and I quote) first true love. It wasn’t hard to figure out why - even before I started talking to him with Avery as a our main topic and mutual friend. He was always nice, thoughtful, and romantic. That’s what Avery said. What she failed to mention was his complete inability to - to -

“You can never walk away from me,” he called, lagging behind. My jaw clicked as I tried to walk faster. “You can try, but I’ll always be walking after you.”

I whirled around, pointing a finger at him. “You gotta stop with the one liners,” I growled. “It’s not doing good for my sanity. You’re driving me insane.”

“So you’ve mentioned,” he said.

“So why don’t you -” I abruptly broke off, my eyes growing wide. Was that - “Uglyboy?” I blurted and instantly felt my face flame. Oh, wow, I meet him for the second time and that’s what I say?

Wait, why did I care anymore?

I took a hesitant step forward. He was eyeballing me. Why’s he grilling me for? I squinted at him. “Can I help you?”

Dale was suddenly beside me, his crooked smile gone and his face was indifferent.

“Can I speak to you?” Joel said after glancing warily at Dale. I didn’t blame him. Dale was sort of looking at him like he was dirt beneath his shoe.

“Um, sure.” I looked at Dale before walking off to Joel.

It wasn’t that far from Dale, but it was far enough so he wouldn’t hear what we were talking about. Truthfully, this was extremely unexpected. I anticipated that Joel would never want to speak to me again because of my… behavior… towards him.

I smiled sheepishly. “Um, sorry about before. I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

He raised his eyebrows, but I saw him avert his eyes to the side of a second. Huh, probably wanted to forget about that humiliating day. “You didn’t. Ego was bruised, that’s all.”

I appraised him in amusement. “Hm.” I guess my third-degrees were a bit brutal. “So I figured I scared you,” I said, “so why are you talking to me?”

He crossed his arms over his chest. We were roughly the same height; Avery’s boyfriend wasn’t that tall. But he had that swag to him that made you look in his direction when he was speaking. And right now, it was unfortunately working on me.

Forget the fact that he was right in front of me and he wanted to talk.

“Avery misses her best friend,” he said.

I blinked, trying to make sure I heard right. Wow, I couldn’t believe it. “You’re here on her behalf?” I asked skeptically. I knew Avery. She would never let others fight her battles.

He smirked dryly, probably think along the same lines as me. “She doesn’t know that I’m talkin’ to you. But yo, seriously, she’s going off. She makes it seem like she’s angry at you or something, but I know otherwise. You gotta talk to her. She thinks that you’re not her best friend anymore.”

I stared at him, blankly registering his words. I felt an off emotion rising in my chest, and it surprised me when I smirked humorlessly. “I guess she knows how it feels like to be neglected.”

He made a perplexed face. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Oh, God, I can’t believe I’m actually having this conversation. “I’m not here for her convenience, when she only wants to talk about you.” I jabbed a finger on his chest, making him stumble, but he kept his footing. “I know she rants - I get that - but sometimes - ” I threw my hands up in exasperation. He wouldn’t get it. No one gets it. I love Avery like a sister - I’ll always be there for her - but the minute she sinks her bitch-claws into me like I did something wrong purposely to hurt her - I don’t know what I’ll do.

I mean, I do - I am - oh, jeez, I don’t even know.

“So what do you want to happen?” I asked tiredly. “I’m sick of being the rag she wipes her feet on. I love Avery, but she treats me like I’m nothing.”

Joel stared straight at me. “I can’t answer that.”

Annoyance pumped through my veins. “Alright, I get. So why did you come and see me? Did you want me to beg to talk to her? Avery and I have a lot in common, and our pride is one of them. I’m not initiating anything, especially since she burned me first.”

“I thought you guys were best friends,” he argued. “Aren’t you wiling to take that down for her, at least?”

“There was a time when I would’ve done that,” I said. “But not when she’s punishing me for liking one of her exes. It’s not my fault - and I stepped off for her. But she just… doesn’t get it.”

“Oh, I get it plenty,” a voice said behind me. I should’ve known.

Joel shrugged when I glared at him and moved away. Avery was right behind me when I turned around, looking beautiful as always. I pursed my lips and forced a smile.

“Eavesdropping isn’t nice,” I said.

She made a strained face. “Yeah, well, sometimes you can’t help yourself.”

I smirked sardonically. “Well, isn’t this awkward.”

She shrugged. “Only if you want it to be.”

We stood in silence. My arms were crossed over my chest and my eyes were boring holes at the spot above her head. She was most likely doing the same thing. She came to see me, didn’t she? So I’m not saying anything until she does.

“This is worse than our fight during winter in seventh grade,” she murmured.

“It is.”

“It’s not that I’m mad at you,” she said, her voice tense. “It’s just - it’s weird, okay? It’s weird.”

“No,” I said. “If I liked your brother - that’s weird. This is just selfish.”

She straightened. “Oh, so I’m selfish? I didn’t realize that. Sorry.”

I gritted my teeth at her sarcasm. “Don’t even lie, you know you are. You know you want everything your way, everything according to you. And if that doesn’t happen, you get angry and make it seem like the other person’s fault!” I raised my voice. “Well, it’s not. It’s not my fault that I when I wanted to help Dale, I ended up liking him. Just like it‘s not your fault that you started liking Joel when he still had a girlfriend.”

Her face was starting to look red. “That’s different.”

“Oh, yeah? Okay, it is. It’s even worse to get at someone who’s taken. I expressed my disapproval but you ignored it. I said it was wrong, but even so I was behind you. You liked the guy right? Even when you were hurting someone else in the process?” Avery started checking with Joel when he was still with his girlfriend. But did she care about that? Nope. Apparently her type is ‘taken’.

“Well, you promised. You swore on our friendship.”

Oh, she did not. I can’t believe that she even pulled that card.

“And I was bent on keeping that promise until the end of time,” I practically yelled. “And I am, I’m keeping it. I’m not going out with him, am I?”

“Oh, so that’s why you two are at the mall together. I suppose it’s not a date, too, right?”

“It’s not.” My voice was curt. “I’m here for volunteering.”

“Then what’s he doing here?”

“I don’t know, ask him. He doesn’t like me, remember? You heard it loud and clear.”

I finally took a good look at Avery’s face when she stayed silent. Her expression was torn, and I knew that she knew she was wrong to assume, but her pride. Goodness, her pride. She won’t lower it for anyone.

I inclined my head a fraction. “Maybe you should’ve spoken to me before you assumed anything. Didn’t I tell you to stop assuming? It just leads you into disaster.”

And because there wasn’t anything else to say, I turned away without a backward glance, finally letting the tears roll down my cheeks.

“That was pretty… intense.”

I barely stopped myself from sniffling. I smiled grimly straight ahead. “Yeah, well, she was always dramatic.”

I felt him sit beside me. This was embarrassing. I’m surprised that Dale wasn’t running for his life at the sight of me. He’s seen every side of me, and I’m not sure if that was a good thing or bad. But my gosh, seeing me snap at my best friend like that… also a friend of his - his ex - the person he -

Whatever happened to my normal, boring life?

I groaned. “And here comes the guilt…”

He chuckled. “Yeah, well, maybe this’ll make you feel better.” He placed the gift bag in front of me and, incredulously, I glanced at him. His smile was gentle. “Take it, Kee. I really don’t feel like returning the bag - going the first time was embarrassing enough - and I wouldn’t want anyone else to have it.”

I smiled at his joking tone. “Thanks, Dale.” I leaned onto him for a brief moment in my form of a hug and straightened. “What’s the verdict?”

He knew what I was talking about. “Avery left with Joel.”

I chose my words carefully. “How’d she look?”

“Angry.” My heart deflated. “But sad. It was the angry-sad kind of thing.”

“How’s that possible?”

“Trust me, it’s possible.”

And because I didn’t feel like talking, I only nodded and stared at the parking lot. I was supposed to be in with a student right now, but honestly, I didn’t feel like it. It was okay seeing how there was another student teacher somewhere there. Just being in the presence of Dale calmed me.

“What’re you going to do?”

“Huh?” I was torn from my reverie and registered his words. “Oh.” I shrugged. “I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.”

He surprised me by throwing an arm over my shoulder and squeezed me to his side tightly. It made me feel secured. “And if you want, I’ll be right by your side.”

I smirked dryly. “Holding my hand, I suppose?”

“Only if I see you falling.” His teeth flashed. How did we go from practically strangers to this? “I’m on your side, Kee, believe it or not.”

I only shrugged because I didn’t believe him. Everything at this point was numb to me, and my mood was indifferent. Losing a best friend did that to you.

I was dying here. I flipped through my whole blinder, my eyes frantic, my body trembling. “Oh, God. Oh, God,” I chanted under my breath. I whipped out three sheets of paper, looking for the correct one.

“Last call for the assignment,” my teacher called from the front of the classroom.

“Wait,” I wailed. “I have it, sir, just - give - me -”

An arm extended from my side and plucked a sheet of paper from the messy pile on my pod. “Is this it?”

I grabbed the paper and stuffed it in front of my face and my knees nearly buckled due to my relief. “I found it!” I flung myself to the front of the classroom and handed it to the amused looking teacher. “See, sir? I do do my work.”

“Wait ’till I mark it, Kea. I’ll be the judge of that.”

I shot him a mockingly offended look before heading back to my pod where Dale was casually leaning on the desk near my seat. I appraised him blankly and met his expectant gaze. “You’re blocking my seat,” I declared.

He rolled his eyes, but the smile on his face gave it away. “Sorry, ma’am.” And then he sat on my seat. I glared at him, but didn’t move from my position in front of him. I felt his gaze on me as I rubbed my eyes. “You okay?”

I nodded, stifling a yawn. “Yep.”

“Doesn’t look that way to me.”

“I think someone needs glasses.”

I really didn’t want to talk about it. He must’ve sensed that too, because he stopped badgering me and pulled up the stool next to him so I could sit.

“She’s still your friend,” he finally said.

I grunted, pushing buttons into my calculator.

“She won’t let some stupid thing get in the way.”

“It’s not stupid. It’s about you.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Yes, it is.”

“No, it’s not.”

Exasperated, I whirled towards him. His arms were crossed of his chest; he was staring at me in a challenging way, like he knew he was right. Well, he wasn’t.

I paused. At least, I don’t think he was.

“It’s about her pride,” he said, reading my face. “It may have begun with me, but now it’s about both of you. I know her, Kee. I also know you. You both gotta suck it up and just talk to each other.”

“I know that,” I said, irritated, “but if I go first, she won’t learn from anything. Everything’s being handed to her; she’s only going to get what she wants from this point on. And someone actually is stubborn enough to go against her - it doesn’t matter if it’s me.”

“What, you’re teaching her a lesson?”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever you want to call it, I’m sticking by it.” God, those words made me flinch when I heard them coming from my own mouth. I always knew that Avery needed to be put in her place, I honestly didn’t think it would be me to do it.

I missed her.

“You miss her.”

He was psychic. I eyed him. “Yeah.”

He let out a long sigh and threw his arm around me. “Then I think you know what you really have to do.”

I inspected a drawing on the pod. “I guess.”

It was nerve wracking, that’s what it was. I hopped on spot, trying to stay warm and find the guts to ring the doorbell. What’s the worst she can do, anyway? Slam the door in my face? Ignore me? Never speak to me? Well, that’s already happening. I’m at the bottom, so there’s nothing really to lose.

“But my dignity,” I sighed before pushing the doorbell before I ran for my life.

It swung open almost right away, Avery on the other side with her arms crossed over her chest. I eyed her warily. She was staring at me in a calculating way that made my skin prickle. Oh god, she knew that I was standing there for ten minutes. She must think I’m a total loser now.

“Hi,” I croaked, and then cleared my throat. Wow, this was so awkward. We’ve only ever had two awkward moments in our lives: one was when we fought during winter; and the other was when I found out… um, explicit details about her and her boyfriend that I really didn’t approve of (or needed to know).

“Hey.”

I pursed my lips, releasing a breath. “I hope you know how much my pride is taking a beating,” I said, my voice monotone. If anyone knew how much my dignity meant, Avery would be the person. “I was bent on never speaking to you.”

“I figured.” Her tone was slightly confused.

I looked up. “I’m not some next chick that you can forget, unless I never meant anything to you as a person.” Ha, laying it on thick straight up from the start. “I wasn’t trying to get at Dale, and you have to understand that.”

She stared at me, her face indifferent.

I looked back, an eyebrow quirked slightly, but the rest of my face was blank.

We both averted our eyes at the same time. At a different time, I would’ve burst out laughing at this exact moment. This was getting ridiculous! How much shit did we go through and make it out at the top? How many times has she had my back, and I had hers?

She released a breath, but I kept my eyes trained on her doorbell. “I’m selfish, and I’m a bitch. You know that.”

I pursed my lips into a smirk. “Don’t I ever.”

“But you’re the only person in the whole world that’ll take my shit.” I felt the tension dissolving. I looked at her. “Kea,” she said, her face crumbling. “Please, let’s never do that again.” She was never the one to say the traditional ‘I’m sorry’. I wasn’t either.

We understood each other, and that’s why we’re each other’s bitches until the end of time.

I accepted her hug with a laugh. “The next time you burn me like that, Avery, I’m serious. It’s not going to be as easy as this. You have to change your crap ways.”

She nodded. “Only because I love you.”

And just like that, we were good again.

I licked my ice cream happily. Avery’s arm was hooked around mine as we walked around the mall leisurely. We were chilling a few days after our Make Up Session (which consisted of a movie marathon, and her buying me a whole tub of ice cream as a token of apology). We were playing Game. It was a little shallow, but we rated practically everyone we saw on our scale of Hot to Not. Every number had its reason, and this was a product of complete boredom two summers ago.

“Game,” Avery murmured lazily as a tall girl passed by. I casually glanced back and my eyebrow went up at the sight of her hair.

“Seven, because of her hair.” I squinted my eyes. “I wonder what shampoo she uses?”

“Looks like Dove.”

I glanced at her incredulously. “How the hell do you know that?” She shrugged. She was usually right. She was a hair type of girl while I was more of the purse kind. Some next man passed me and I suppressed a smile. “Game. Red fitted.”

She leaned forward discreetly. “Um, I think he needs to be introduced to some tweezers.”

“I knew you were going to say that.” I elbowed her. “And plus, he does have two eyebrows.” She looked at me dully. “They just… happen to meet in the middle.”

While she was dying at my side (are those cackles I hear?), I glanced around. She panted for breath before straightening, trying to get my attention. I see chocolate. I’m craving now. Craving.

“That lady,” she said, nodding to a young looking mom.

“Hate her. She’s so pretty. I’ll give her a nine, because I’m jealous.”

She was suppressing her smile. “That next boy with that other boy.”

I looked. And then I looked back at her. “No comment.” Then I began to feel guilty and conceded with a, “OK, six, because of their confidence.”

She grinned insanely. “That boy standing beside that hot girl.”

I glanced surreptitiously, turned back to her, and then did a double take back. The girl was hot, and I immediately hated her (because she was pretty… ahem…), but that’s not why I was gawking. Guess who she had her arms wrapped around.

“I see Dale,” Avery said, her voice amused and questioning.

“Me too,” I cocked my eyebrow at her and shrugged. “Whatever, let’s go get food.”

She yanked me back when I was about to make my stealthy escape. “We just had lunch, and you went and had yourself ice cream. Twice.” Jeez, she didn’t have to be so blunt. “And plus.” Her voice was too casual. “He’s looking right at us.”

Oh, crap.

I tried to steer our direction but she held her position, and the traitor went and called out in that voice of hers, “Dale!” and she just had to beckon him.

I felt her smothering her laughter. “That girl looks like she wants to kill us both.”

“That’s your fault,” I said, and looked up just as Dale stopped in front of us. I stopped myself from staring too hard. He looked good in our school uniforms, but damn, when he was wearing his own clothes…

“Game,” Avery said, her face beaming.

Dale raised an eyebrow, his hand casually in his pockets. I tried not to twitch, but the smile on my face was sly. “Way beyond my expectations,” I muttered back and smirked a little at him. “Hey, Dale.”

“Kee,” he nodded, and then his eyes landed on the bag hanging off my shoulder. His grin was crooked. “Nice purse.”

I patted it thoughtfully. “It is.”

“Where’d you get it?”

“Yeah,” the girl interrupted, her voice surprisingly sweet sounding. I smiled at her. “Where did you get it?”

I looked at Avery. She gave me an encouraging smile, her eyes frantic at delivering messages, and I tried not to laugh at this situation. “Oh, some guy.”

“Some guy, huh?” Dale said.

“Yep.”

“Aw, that’s so sweet,” the brunette crooned. “By the way, I’m Melody. Nice to meet you both.” She pointedly hooked her arms with Dale, just as Avery and I were, but I had a feeling she was trying to make a point.

Wow, I didn’t know I could feel this possessive about that arm of his. I shrugged the feeling off.

“I’m Kea, and this is Avery.”

“Hey,” Avery greeted. “Um, Melody, actually I needed a second opinion on this purse I saw, just down that way. It’ll be just one hot sec, can you come and see?”

Melody looked suspicious, but shrugged and followed. I watched them, cursing and thanking Avery all in one. “Hot girlfriend there, Dale. When were you going to tell me?”

He smirked, rocking on the heel of his feet. I glanced at him from under my lashes, almost afraid to lock gazes.

“She’s a coworker,” he said. “We’re on our lunch break.”

“Oh yeah?” I tried to suppress my smile, but I couldn’t.

He blew out a breath, “Screw it,” he muttered under his breath, and before I knew it, his hand grasped my wrist and he pulled me forward, successfully covering my mouth with his in one swift move. I gasped in surprise and felt fire ignite in my stomach when his tongue swept in without warning.

OK, honestly, he was my first kiss, and I have no experience, but I can definitely tell he was very skilled with that mouth of his.

When we pulled away, we were both breathing heavily. A few people stopped to smirk knowingly in our direction. Um, he did kind of had me leaned backwards against the railing. Wow. I didn’t know which was worse: the library caught by a teacher, or the mall, a very public place.

He looked down at me, his eyes burning mine.

“Oh, sorry,” he said, but he looked anything but. “Were you supposed to get Avery’s permission?”

I slapped his chest, trying to push him away. Gosh, what did he think I was? Someone to kiss whenever he felt like it? I voiced my thoughts out loud, squinting at him.

OK. Why was he giving me a frustrated look, like I was stupid or something?

“You got something to say?” I demanded. “I don’t like that face you’re making.”

Dale shook his head. I smacked his arm (and tried not to wince when I felt my hand throb). The end of his lips were lifted in a half smile, and he was just… staring.

Now, this was uncomfortable. I felt my face start to go red, and I looked away, towards the food court. I was sort of hungry. You know. All this anxiety is making my stomach grumble.

“Do you know?” Dale said, his tone demanding. Abruptly, I felt him grab my chin and force me to look at him. We were standing properly now, but he was still too close. I smelt him and felt his body heat.

That’s how you know that I needed to step away before anything else… drastic happens.

“Know what?” I ventured blankly, squashing any hope forming in my chest.

“I don’t know whether you’re playing dumb or not,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair.

“I never play dumb,” I dismissed. “I’m just stupidly oblivious.”

“Clearly.”

I glared, “If you got something to say, spit it out. I don’t read between the lines.” Honestly, does he think I’m psychic? And how dare he -

“I like you,” he said almost immediately, as if he was expecting my answer. My mouth stopped working and I gaped at him. “I’m sure I’m falling in love with you. And if you have a problem with that, then sorry. Avery doesn’t have control over that.”

All I could do while staring stupidly was say, “I don’t.”

His eyes cleared and a slow grin began to tug his lips. “You don’t, huh?”

I laughed a little. “I don’t.”

“And is that all you have to say?” he asked, his voice compelling. He was idly playing with the zipper of my purse as he glanced around, patiently waiting for my response. I caught a couple of girls passing by, giving him a once-over. My eyebrow shot up as I turned to him.

“You’re too hot for me,” I told him. “I’m pretty sure girls are going to go crazy over you, and I’m not sure if I can handle that.”

His grin was wide. “I like how you’re already jealous.” He deliberately turned around and flashed his killer smile, winking at the group.

“You’re a cow,” I hissed and smacked his shoulder, trying to hide my grin. I failed, by the way. He laughed, tugging me to him by the waist.

“Honestly, you have nothing to worry about.” He paused in consideration. “But I know what guys are thinking when they look at you.” I stared at him blankly. “You best stay away from them.”

“I always stayed away from guys until you,” I muttered under my breath.

He tugged my hoodie. “And keep this up at all times.”

Laughing, I pushed him away. “Okay there, buddy.”

Half a second later, Avery appeared, Melody no where in sight. I didn’t bother asking her what she did to the poor girl; Avery had her ways of scarring people for life. She was out of breath, but a huge smile was on her face.

“So, what happened?”

Dale and I shared a quick glance.

“Well,” I started, “I’m still sort of hungry.”

“She is,” Dale agreed. “And I’m sort of taking her to dinner tonight since you won’t feed her and all.”

I made a face when Avery turned to me and gave me a pointed look that clearly said for me to explain to her. “I meant right now,” I said just to spite him. Grinning broadly, I danced away when he tried to elbow me.

He made a sound at the back of his throat. “Meet me after work? I exceeded my break time.” He made a face.

“Oh, she’ll meet you, all right,” Avery said. I rolled my eyes and nodded towards him. He saluted with two fingers, fished a chocolate bar and threw it at my head before he turned and walked away.

Rubbing my abused forehead, I stared at the Kit Kat. “I bet he knows my favorite chocolate,” I said. Avery just rolled her eyes.

The smile felt twisted and sick on my face like it wasn’t supposed to be there. Of course it felt like that; I mean, it practically took all my willpower to lift the ends of my lips.

I felt a nudge from under the table, and I looked up, my face strained. A pointed look was shot in my direction and I tried to rearrange my face.

“That was, um… delicious.” I tried not to gag when I felt my stomach protesting at the wretched thing I just swallowed. Our server smile politely and whirled around, probably going to tell the new chef that what he made was acceptable. Oh, God. I think I just lied for the bad.

I mean, not that lying was good, but, you know.

“I guess I know why the sample plate was still full,” a sour voice coated with disgust said from across the table.

I looked up at Avery and smiled. “At least it smelt nice.” We shared a look before a familiar scent wafted into my nose. I felt my heart start to pound and a warm feeling spread across my chest as I looked up with a smile.

“Hey, Dale,” Avery greeted. Dale nodded at her with a half grin before he looked down at me; he was looking as handsome as ever in his uniform.

I raised an eyebrow. “Hey, how was your day?” I asked, scooting over so he could sit beside me. He sprawled himself dramatically on the booth as he threw an arm over me. I tried shaking him off, but his hand tightened around my shoulder.

“Tiring. This woman made me bring back the most cleanest fork this restaurant could ‘afford‘.” He grunted under his breath and closed his eyes, leaning his head back. I scrunched my face up and looked at Avery who just smirked and mouthed ‘hot picture’ in my direction. I waved her off.

“What a cow,” I said idly.

“I think I need to use the washroom,” Avery said brightly and stood up before I could say anything. Or even look at her threateningly like I wanted so badly to do right now. She was getting an ear full later on. Gosh.

“Why didn’t you come to my table?” he grumbled.

“Because I knew that you wouldn’t get any work done, and the last thing you want is to get fired,” I pointed out, taking a sip out of my glass.

“You could have motivated me,” he said and straightened. “So, how was your day?”

“Motivated,” I snorted, placing the glass down. “Student after student after student.” I pursed my lips in thought. “Fun stuff,” I finished, and took a bite out of my garlic bread. I felt him chuckle beside me, and I pointedly gave him a death glare. “May I help you?”

“That’s your, what, sixth garlic bread?”

I glanced at the bread in my hand before shrugging. “I thought it was the tenth.” I scowled. “And what are you, a stalker?”

“No, just your boyfriend who happened to can‘t keep his eyes off you.”

“My boyfriend who’s going to get his ass walloped if he steals my bread!” I slapped his hand away from the basket. He should know not to steal my food after six months of dating. What a cow. “Go do your job.”

He grinned. “I’m still on break.” He managed to swipe one and stuffed it into his mouth before I could do anything. “I think your appetite is as big as mine.”

“I think it’s more.” Wow, I just booked that. For a few moments, it was silent. It was the comfortable kind that made you smile once you think about it, you know? After everything, it turned out to be like this.

“Kind of glad I asked you out, huh?” he mused, reading my mind.

“Kind of glad I rejected you in the first place, too,” I said, grinning wickedly when he tried to tug my hair but I dodged out of his hold.

“You know what?” he said, staring right into my eyes.

“What?” I said, unable to keep the bright smile off my face.

“I actually need a favour….” A gleam entered his eyes, and that half smile on his face was doing wonders to my sanity. I fought to keep the warm feeling in my chest at bay as I quirked an eyebrow.

“That sounds familiar,” I said.

“Well, maybe it is familiar.” He reached forward, his hand cupping the side of my face. My own hand stole up to his and I tightened my grip.

“Which is?”

“I need you to tell this girl something.”

My lips pressed into a smile. “And what would you like me to tell her?”

His half smile stretched to a grin. “That I love her, and even though she’s stubborn and won’t let me pay for her meal on dates; or she’s competitive to the point that I’m actually doing my homework regularly to beat her ass; or the fact that she smiles at random people to piss me off…”

Just to spite him, I smiled slyly at his lovely (-looking) coworker who happened to pass by. He raised an eyebrow, but winked and smirked at Dale who shot him a look.

“Where were you?” I said like I didn‘t do what I just did.

“Yeah, where was I?” he grumbled. “I’m spilling my heart out here, and you go and do that.”

“Those were very positive points about this girl you love,” I said politely, trying not to choke on the word love. His mouth stopped working and he looked at me. My face grew serious, but a smile was still tugging my lips.

“She knows what I mean.” He shrugged.

For once, I didn’t need him to say it straight up, because I did understand. I read between the lines, and I like what I’m seeing.

I didn’t protest when he began to pull me toward his chest. “Maybe just a tad,” I said.

He grinned. “Just a tad,” he agreed, before his mouth covered my own.

All I’m going to say about that kiss is, thank God my parents weren’t here to see this. I’m still not allowed to date until thirty! No lie.

But then again, there’s always -

“Dale, get your mouth OFF my best friend!”

Laughing, I pulled away when Avery stormed to us and literally grabbed him by the hair. He cursed, trying to wrench away, as I turned back to the table that suddenly had our food on the table. I sipped my soup as I heard Dale’s boss scream, “Dale, get to your tables before I fire that cute ass of yours!”

I glanced at my boyfriend who looked helpless against Avery’s attacks (as you can tell, she got over everything and took her duty as my best friend/bodyguard very seriously), and smiled.

“I’ll tell her,” I told him, referring to his ‘favour‘.

He glared mockingly in my direction. And then all I saw him was take something from his apron pocket and launch it in my direction.

After I stopped seeing stars, there was no sign of him; Avery was huffing in the seat in front of me. I glanced down and smiled widely.

On my lap was the familiar red Kit Kat bar.

Author’s note:

I like how you read it all the way to the end. (:

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