Katie’s POV

Chapter 1 - Reactions

From Play Your Part’s Ending:

“Katie, can I kiss you again?” he asked, his voice low as he licked his lips.

I couldn’t do anything but nod my head and continue to stare. The anticipation was excruciating as Lucas slowly closed the distance between us. I could tell he was worried about scaring me and it made my heart soar. He really, truly loved me and cared for me. I had no idea how this had happened, but it was definitely amazing and wonderful.

Lucas pulled away after a minute, resting his forehead against mine. “You know, I hadn’t meant to blurt out that I loved you that way last night.”

“No, I didn’t know. Did you have some big plan, Lucas?”

He glanced quickly at me, actually managing to appear a bit shy. “Well, yeah. I had actually planned to take you to the beach and tell you there, knowing how that’s one of your favorite places.”

“And did you think the sand would somehow soften the impact of your words?” I teased, smiling at him.

“I don’t think I thought it out that far. I was sort of consumed with how to phrase it without causing you to run. Our friendship, it’s not like anyone else’s in the world, Dawson. And it means so much to the both of us. I was worried you would automatically assume any change between us would mess that up. That’s why I was so worried about telling you.”

“And I proved you were right to worry, going so far as to try to walk home in the rain,” I chuckled, needing a bit of humor. “You sure know how to pick ‘em, huh Harvey?”

“I love you,” was his only reply, seconds before he started to kiss me again.

I wished I could say that to him, but I knew I couldn’t mean it right now. So many people our age threw around the word “love” without having any real concept of the meaning behind the word. They never thought twice about saying “I love you” to someone, or even spent time contemplating if it was true or not. They just said it, like it was no big deal. But I knew it was a huge deal and that I would say it when I knew with everything in me that it was how I felt. Lucas deserved nothing less. Someday, hopefully soon, I would tell him and I would mean it…and maybe, just maybe, on that day, I would actually be worthy of what he was offering me.

Lucas had once made the joke that I was the love of his life. While I would never be a true Juliet, all girly and easy to love, I would be whatever he needed most…a friendly ear to listen to his thoughts and dreams, a hand to hold for reassurance and comfort, a smile to make his day better, or a hug to give comfort. It would be hard and some of it might feel damn near impossible to pull of, but it would be worth it…He was worth it. One way or another, I was going to stick around and find out what it was like to play—no, live—the part of the girl loved by the great guy.

Now:

Lucas pulled away after a minute, resting his forehead against mine. “You know, if we get out of the car right now, we can still check into the office before the second period bell rings.”

“Your responsible side is back.”

“It never left. It just knows there’s something more important than high school.”

“What’s that?”

“You,” he replied, trailing his fingers down the side of my face.

I grabbed his hand, holding it in mine. I was already feeling so many things and having him touch me that way…“Alright, Harvey,” I said, focusing on his earlier statement. “Let’s get your corny self into the office.”

We got out of the car and headed toward the office with Lucas holding tightly to my hand. “Good morning, Ms. Sharp,” he greeted.

“Good morning, Lucas,” she said, smiling. “How are you, Katie?”

“Fine, thank you,” I replied, truly meaning it for the first time in a very long while.

“Ms. Sharp, we need notes for first period. Katie’s car is rather old and it wouldn’t start for her this morning. Her dad doesn’t have a cell phone so she called and asked me to pick her up for school,” Lucas explained.

“That is so sweet and responsible of you, Lucas,” Ms. Sharp said, as she pulled out a notepad and started writing excuses for the both of us. She handed the papers to Lucas and patted his hand.

“Thank you, Ms. Sharp. We really appreciate it,” Lucas told her, leading me toward the door.

“Bye, Ms. Sharp,” I called to her, as we walked outside.

The second period bell rang shrilly and I looked up at Lucas, laughing at how well he knew the bell schedule. He wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me tightly against him and kissing the top of my head. I sighed, leaning into him and enjoying how comforted I felt. That only lasted a few seconds, though, as my brain suddenly filled up with worry over how people would react to this new development.

“What do you think Sadie is going to do when she sees us?” I asked, sneaking a glance at him as we walked toward the gym.

His face filled with his cheesy grin and his blue eyes sparkled with humor. “I think she’s going to squeal and try to kill you with a hug.”

“Will you save me?” I questioned, as we stood to the side of the gym doors, waiting for Sadie.

He looked down at me, his eyes intense and serious as his hands cupped my face. “Always, Katie. Whether it’s in your dreams or out here in the real world.” He lowered his head, softly brushing his lips against mine. “I love you,” he whispered before connecting our mouths in a sweet kiss.

A loud squeal sounded next to us, causing Lucas to pull away and break our kiss. “Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Finally!” Sadie cried, running over to us, her red hair flying out behind her. She pushed Lucas out of the way roughly and hugged me tightly.

I looked to Lucas for help, but he only laughed, shaking his head. I sighed, knowing there really was nothing he could do about it. “So I take it this change in the course of events is okay with you?” I ventured, pulling myself out of Sadie’s grip and stepping closer to Lucas. His arm went around my shoulders and I felt his lips on my head.

“Katherine Ann Amico! I cannot believe you just asked me that,” Sadie huffed, her hands at her hips as she frowned at me.

“That was called a joke, Sadie. Lighten up,” I told her.

“As much fun as this is to watch, I have a class to get to,” Lucas announced, chuckling lightly.

“Yes, and you’ve already been tardy once today for my sake so please get going,” I said.

Once again, I found myself in his arms with lips on mine. I couldn’t believe how right this felt, how easy I was able to accept this.

“I love you. See you after class.” Lucas let go and took off running toward his classroom.

“Katie!” Sadie cried, tugging on my arm. “Let’s go change and dish. I have to know what happened!”

I allowed her to pull me into the gym, trying to think of what she would ask and what I would say. I hoped she wouldn’t make too big of a deal out of this, but I knew it was wishful thinking. Not only had I been kissing a boy, but it was her brother.

“Katie, what happened this morning? You weren’t here and then you were, and you were kissing Lucas,” Sadie said, her words running together in her excitement.

“Um…he asked me to be his girlfriend,” I replied, biting nervously at my lip.

“And you said?” she pressed, sitting down on the bench next to me.

“Yes,” I whispered.

“Finally!” Sadie sighed, hugging me around the shoulders.

I carefully extracted myself from her, pulling my shoes off as an excuse. As helpful as Sadie had been lately, I still wasn’t able to completely relax around her. There were still things she didn’t know about and I wasn’t ready to share.

“He really does love you, you know. I never thought Lucas would be capable of that, but I’m so glad I was wrong,” Sadie said.

I just nodded my head, not sure if I should reply, or where to even begin for that matter.

“Katie, did you tell him how you feel about him?”

“Um…I’m not…I’m not really sure about how I feel. I’m still trying to wrap my mind around the idea that this is really happening.”

“You’ll figure it out soon. I’m sure about that,” Sadie said, completely confident.

“Let’s just focus on gym class for now,” I told her, changing my shirt.

Gym consisted of the quickest game of dodge-ball I had ever taken part in—probably because I stepped in front of the first throw to make sure I could sit out. I made my way up the bleachers, stopping about halfway, and sat down, resting my chin in my hands, with my elbows on my knees. I watched Sadie having a great time, knocking out every person she aimed for. I was afraid to let my mind go over last night and this morning, worried that my insecurities would make me run before I even got the chance to know what I would be running from. I was determined to stay, but I wasn’t sure if my feet would obey my heart.

After gym was over, Sadie and I started walking toward third period. She was being really great, letting me walk in silence, and I wished I could express to her how much I appreciated that. It was on the list, so I knew I would eventually get to it…I was just starting to get a little impatient with my progress.

I was yanked out of my thoughts by someone grabbing my waist and pulling me backward, causing me to yelp loudly. Sadie laughed as Lucas kissed my cheek, holding me tightly against him.

“Hello, beautiful,” he whispered into my ear.

I struggled and freed myself from his arms. “How many times do I have to tell you not to sneak up on me?” I fussed, annoyed that he had scared me like that. “Just because I let you be my boyfriend doesn’t mean you get to scare the crap out of me.”

“Yeah, Lucas. You shouldn’t scare her on the first day. She might change her mind,” Sadie chimed in.

Lucas’s face fell and he looked at me warily, as if I would really do something like that to him. I think he was just as scared as I was that I was going to run.

I tugged on his arm, getting him to look at me. “Don’t do that, okay?”

He nodded, putting his arm around my waist and pulling me against his side. I hoped he knew I meant both scaring me and being worried I would run. I needed his confidence to help me stop myself from running away and hiding from all of this.

Sadie sighed dramatically. “You know this isn’t going to be any fun for me if you let him off the hook so easily instead of helping me to torture him.”

“I’ll still help, just not today,” I chuckled, wrapping both of my arms around Lucas.

“I can live with that,” Sadie giggled.

Lucas chuckled as he extracted himself from me, kissing my forehead. “This is where I take my leave, ladies. I have a biology test to pass.”

“Good luck,” Sadie and I called after him as he ran across the school yard.

I tried to concentrate on my teacher during third period, but all I could focus on was that I had fourth period with Ellie and Lindsey next. The news had already spread about Lucas and me, with everyone around me whispering and pointing. I did my best not to imagine what the evil twins would have to say to me. I ended up laying my head down and repeating my haiku in my head over and over until class ended.

Sadie tried to reassure me as we waited for Lucas, but it wasn’t really working. At the rate I was going, I would either wring a finger off or bite through my lip. Lucas finally appeared, smiling at us, and I forced myself to wait, not to run to him like some scared, little girl—even though that’s exactly what I felt like. For once in my life, I actually had something to lose, and if anyone was capable of making my life miserable, it was the evil twins.

Once Lucas was in arms reach, I wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging tightly to him. I hoped he hadn’t noticed the color of my eyes since I knew they were gray right now and that it would worry him.

“You’re anxious,” he whispered. “Ellie and Lindsey?” Of course he noticed—he always noticed. As he had told me once before, he paid attention.

I nodded my head, afraid that I wouldn’t be able to talk without showing just how anxious I was. I wasn’t afraid of them, but of what they might say in front of Lucas. He still had no clue about the things they said to and about me, and I damn sure wasn’t going to fill him in today of all days.

“Want me to walk you into the classroom today?” he asked.

I nodded my head again, holding just a little tighter to him.

He chuckled softly, his warm breath blowing across the shell of my ear and tickling. “You’re going to have to let go for that to happen,” he said.

I laughed nervously and pulled my arms away from him, only to have his arm wrap around my waist as he pulled me against his side, not letting there be any space between us. Once again, I was marveling at how much he wanted this…how much he wanted me.

Sadie, Lucas, and I headed into the building that housed our fourth period classrooms as the two of them argued over whether or not Lucas could keep his best friend title now that he was my boyfriend. Of course, Lucas wanted to keep it, enjoying having more than one title, and Sadie wanted to be my only best friend again. I was too busy trying to not chew through my lip to give an opinion.

As we entered the classroom, I noticed Ellie and Lindsey were already seated. They looked angry enough to spit nails when they saw the way Lucas had his arm wrapped around me.

Sadie giggled as she slid into her seat, obviously enjoying the discomfort of the evil twins. I wished I could feel that same way about it, but I was only nervous. I didn’t want to get into a fight with them, knowing it would just lead to me getting in trouble and them getting off without so much as a warning. And I certainly didn’t want Lucas getting into trouble over those two evil snakes.

I sat in my chair and Lucas leaned over, whispering into my ear. “While I know you can take them both and make them very sorry, please stay in your seat and allow me to come and claim you after class.”

“That’s rather caveman-ish of you, Harvey,” I chuckled.

“I love you, Katie.”

“Is that the best argument you can come up with for getting me to agree?”

His lips brushed the skin of my ear the slightest bit. “Please?”

I groaned, hating that this new arrangement seemed to somehow give him even more sway with me. “Fine. I’ll be right here.”

“I think you like me just a little,” he chuckled.

I felt myself blush as I pushed him away. “Go to class, Lucas.”

He smiled that cheesy grin of his before kissing my forehead softly. “I love you.” He smiled at me once more and then left the room.

Sadie stared at me, a huge smile on her face.

“What?” I asked, eyeing her warily.

“He is so in love with you, Katie,” Sadie said, taking my hands into hers.

“You think?” I chuckled, rolling my eyes at her.

“I know. That’s the way Caleb looks at me,” Sadie sighed. “We totally have to do something to celebrate! How about dinner and dancing?”

“With my curfew?” I replied, lifting my eyebrows at her.

“I’ve totally got this, Kat. We’ll sweet talk Brian, he’ll let you sleepover, we’ll go out, and my mom will cover if for some crazy reason he calls to check on you.”

“I don’t want to put your mom in that position.”

“She totally won’t mind. She knows we aren’t going to be doing anything we shouldn’t and we won’t be out that late.”

“So where do you want to go?”

“We can have dinner at Lady and Sons.”

“Sadie, that place is so busy all the time, not to mention rather expensive. And honestly, I just want a low-key night.”

“I can call between classes and make reservations for us. And you are so not paying for your own celebration dinner, Katherine.”

“And low-key?”

“Totally low-key,” she promised.

“The dancing?” I asked, wondering how she would possibly pull that part off.

“Shawn can get us into Jazz’d.”

“Man! I really want to go there. I just don’t like the idea of fooling my dad that way.”

“You’ve asked him numerous times to reconsider your curfew,” Sadie pointed out. “It’s not your fault that he keeps seeing you as a twelve year old.”

“True,” I said, nodding my head. “But I just don’t know.”

“Please, Katie,” she begged, showing me her infamous pout. She even made her bottom lip quiver a little.

“Alright, alright,” I said, giving in to her. “Just stop with the pout.”

Our teacher entered the room as the bell rang, ending our conversation until later. I liked Sadie’s idea, but I wanted to know Lucas’s opinion before I agreed. He’d be in just as much trouble as me if my dad found out I was out past curfew. He expected me to follow that dreadfully early thing even when I was at someone else’s house.

The hour seemed to pass quickly, and before I knew it, Sadie and I were repacking our bags. We could hear Ellie and Lindsey out in the hallway so we ran over to the door, peeking out to see what the fuss was about.

“So, it’s true, then? You are actually dating her?” Lindsey asked. She was blocking Lucas’s way, along with Ellie.

“How the mighty have fallen,” Ellie sneered.

Lucas smiled at them. “Not that it’s any of your business, but no, I’m not dating Katie.”

“I knew it was a lie,” Ellie said, sounding smug.

Lucas held up his hand, his grin widening. “Dating is such a small word and doesn’t portray the level of commitment that I’ve promised Katie. So instead, I’ll just say that I’m in love with her. Now, if you’ll excuse me, you’re blocking the way to my girlfriend.” He stepped around them and started walking toward my classroom. He spied Sadie and me hanging out of the door and giggling.

She and I just started to laugh louder as he shook his head at us.

“This is not staying in your seat,” he said, trying to look stern.

“I stayed in the room. Close enough,” I shrugged.

“Come here, Dawson,” he said, pulling me into his arms.

I hugged his waist, amazed at what he had just told the evil twins, but not knowing how to properly express it. “Hi, Harvey,” I said lamely, wishing I could say more.

“Lucas, that was so cool the way you talked to the evil twins,” Sadie chirped.

“Let’s hope the evil twins understood me,” Lucas chuckled.

“So, Sadie had a really great idea for tonight and I was hoping you would like it, too,” I mentioned, looking up at Lucas.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Dinner at Lady and Sons and then listening to a band at Jazz’d,” I answered.

“Katie, that would take you way past your curfew,” he said, frowning.

“Yeah, Sadie figured that out, too. She and I are going to tell Brian we’re having a sleepover,” I explained.

“Which technically won’t be a lie because Katie will be sleeping in my room with me, just not until later tonight,” Sadie added.

“It sounds great to me, but I don’t want you to get into any trouble with Brian,” Lucas cautioned me.

“As I already told Katie, I am taking full and complete responsibility if anything goes wrong, which it won’t. Mom will cover for us if Brian decides to call,” Sadie said.

“As long as you have it all figured out, Sadie,” Lucas said. “Enjoy the biology test, ladies. It’s going to take you the entire hour. I have to go and try to stay awake in history now.” He gave me a kiss on my cheek and then disappeared into the crowd of students.

“Well, that was easier than I thought,” Sadie mused. “I was fairly certain he would get all weird, knowing how he’s afraid of your dad.”

“Yeah, I thought the same thing,” I said. “But honestly, I’m really glad he agreed, because I really want to go listen to a band. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m a bit shocked at how well you’re taking all of this, Kat.”

“I’m more shocked than you, Sadie. Especially after my behavior last night and this morning. Although, maybe that’s why I’m okay right now. I’ve already done the running, the crying, the disbelieving. Nothing left to do but enjoy.”

“I’m here for you if you need to talk. I mean, I know you have trouble talking and all, but I’m here anyway.”

“I know, Pippi,” I chuckled, hiding behind my humor. “You are here, there, and everywhere.”

Sadie laughed as we took our seats in biology class. We used the few minutes before the tardy bell to quickly read over our notes for the test. I was a absolutely shocked at how well this day was going for me, and I was more than a little afraid that looking at it too closely would ruin it, so I decided right then to do everything I could to make myself enjoy it without questioning it. I just hoped I was actually capable of such a feat.