| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
Squatter
It was a lovely day. Busy with his lunch, Jorn didn’t notice Elio until he plonked down next to him. They didn’t say anything for a moment or two, each taking their time to chew and crush their meal and savour the moment. It was quiet for a change, just the two of them and both wanted to prolong the moment as long as necessary. Finally, Elio swallowed.
“They after you too?”
Jorn replied with a ragged choking sound, hacking up some of his lunch that had gone down the wrong way. “God, man, don’t even mention it. They haven’t left me alone all fucking morning.”
“Language.” Came the reply, a snort from Elio summing up his opinion on the situation. One of his ears flicked at a particularly annoying fly as he took another mouthful.
“But they’re nuts, just bloody nuts!” Jorn’s voice raised a few notches in his distress. “I can’t even walk into the barn anymore without them giggling like a gaggle of geese, and don’t get me started on the geese themselves, dammit all.”
“Can’t be helped. It’ll pass.”
“You’re just lucky you don’t fucking live here. Can’t even sleep at night without them…shit, man, keep down. Pretend you’re asleep or something just don’t move.”
He didn’t have to say it twice, and Elio dropped his head to the grass and slowed his breathing, pulling his best dead fish impression ever. Both waited with baited breath as the tell-tale sounds of hooves crept closer, as if tip-toing could disguise their presence. Neither male made a sound, even when the unmistakable sound of females cooing came from across the hedge.
“Oh they are sooooooooooooo~ cute!”
“Sleeping together! Eeeeeeeee!”
“Omg did he just snuggle?”
No, no they hadn’t snuggled but there was no stopping them now. They just had to stay put and wait it out because any movement now would surely bring on the swarms. Needless to say, when the farmer came out for his evening walk he was most bemused at the swarm of ewes crowded around his two stud rams.
“OSI! Your sheep have been writing gay fanfics about my stud rams again!”
AN: If you don't get it, don't worry. Seriously. Inside joke I wrote on a dare....sort of. Yeah. For Lain and Ami since they're the only ones who'll probably get it. XD