Some days she can almost fool herself into believing she loves him.

Almost.

She did, she knows she did. She'd loved him so much. She saw his name on the screen of her phone and her heart had leaped, and when he asked her to be his girlfriend, she thought she'd die of happiness.

Not anymore.

Talking to him is monotonous, the steady routine of her day. And these days she's finding excuses to hang up, little white lies that feel like more of a burden everyday. Soon she won't pick up the phone at all.

He still loves her, she knows it without a trace of overconfidence or arrogance. It's there in the laughter in his voice and the sincerity of his gaze. He loves her, which makes her feel even more guilty.

There's nothing wrong with him, nothing at all. He's sweet and he makes her laugh, but he's just not him.

She has an angel. He's beautiful and graceful, and maybe he doesn't love her, but she loves him completely and irrevocably. She hates it, she wishes she didn't, but she does.

It's hard not to.

She cries and apologizes when the inevitable day comes. She says she's sorry over and over, he forgives her because he still loves her and she cries harder, but she doesn't think he knows why she's apologizing. Sorry, I'm sorry I love him, and I want to love you, but I can't, and I'm sorry.

It's over.

She misses him, the first few days, when she's heartbroken and it feels like she could rip her heart out from her chest and die happily. She wants him to hold her and tell her everything's okay, because he loves her, and she wants that to be enough, like it used to be.

She's okay now, though. It hurts sometimes, and when she's lonely she thinks about them, back when they were happy, and misses those days. Only sometimes, though. Because he's moved on, and she has too. It's not that she wants him back so much as she wants to be happy, to be loved and to love and feel like the entire world could revolve around that.

It doesn't, though, and maybe it never did. It's hard, feeling lonely, but she's not alone. There's an angel by her side, and maybe he doesn't know it yet, but she does. She has a reason to wake up in the mornings and something to look forward to at night.

It's not everything, but it's enough.