I am always haunted by rain
Pale rain that drips down my empty arms
Milky rain that weeps into my hair
I drink that water
And it enters me like the sea
I listen to that water
And it lulls me into a trance
I make myself hear your calls
Just for tonight, will you come into my mind,
rolling under my heart like a smooth and fragile wave?
Would you worry for me dear?

You showed me frailty
It was your body I was puzzled by
When I put my hungry arms around you,
I held only porcelain
Though I never thought it then,
you were a lovely bony thing
I thought I would break you, I worried for you
You showed that to me

I can smell your pearls in the rain
It is a green night
The green is so heavy I can feel it on my wet skin
And I watch the dark come down softly
The emerald blood of the woods is still in me
It was raining, the night I laid down there
I couldn’t feel it
And I am still dazzled by her
The wraith I became, crawling with limp arms
Slipping on jelly legs
It was so green – the forest so alive
I had to creep in to steal myself back

I told you of the first suicide
And you wanted me gone, like I was an infection
Your crazy dreamed-up daughter
Still, I desire to see you again
I’ll whisper of the second suicide to you
Seas of leaves, beds of earth
Knots in my long hair, soil on my bare skin
Sticky pills and dripping woods
A thick, soft dream

You will think,
“How strange you have become,
a girl enamored with her own ruin”
But really, death was an embrace
It is tender
And I could not forget such a rest

I am sorry if I frighten
I am only here, soaked with rain
Singing lullabies to myself
Listening to the green that is still sighing
My hands lost in the grass
The green is sighing for me