For my Big Jack. I still miss you every single day. There was so much that you taught me, and should of been able to keep teaching me. You and my granddad Jerry kept me believing that things could change if you were willing to change them You just have to try hard enough. That is why every time I hear Unstoppable by Rascal Flatts, I think of you. Because you were the one who taught me to keep going when life throws you out on your own.

xxMiraxx.

Unstoppable

Life ain't easy. Life sure as hell ain't fair. It places the people you need there for you, only to rip them out of your life just as fast as they were placed there. You make mistakes and it feels like the end of the world. You act stupidly and end up hurt. Things happen that you aren't proud of and you end up with regrets. They weigh you down and it feels like you just can't let them go. You feel like the whole world is against you and pushing you around. You start to feel like you are drownding in your problems and it's killing you inside with everything that you have to endure. Every challenge. Nothing seems fair. You push and you push but things just don't change. And you starts to feel like it's just you hurting.

So, so you made a lot of mistakes
Walked down the road a little sideways
Cracked a rib when you hit the wall
Yeah, you've had a pocket full of regrets
Pull you down faster than a sunset
Hey, it happens to us all

When it rains, it pours. That's what I had heard all of my life. I had heard that you got challenges to make you stronger. I heard that the people who never got any challenges weren't cut out for it. But I was starting to think with everything that I had to go through that I wasn't strong enough to face it either. I didn't think it was fair that I had to struggle every day of my life with shit that other people could never imagine having to go through. It wasn't right that other people had any easy, breeze through life and I was the one who was bending and breaking. I stopped to ask myself why the hell I had to go through all of this. Why did I have to get challenge after challenge, and challenge on challenge? Couldn't it just be somebody else's turn to take all the hurt? To go through living hell? But it never was. It was always mine. I always got something or another to go through everyday of my life.

When the cold hard rain just won't quit
And you can't see your way out of it

I was in a dark corner, surronded by the dark, with no light in the room that I could see. I had felt that I had been once in a strongly lit room, and suddenly, the power had gone out. I was left in an empty room, that was dark and lonely. And it hurt and scared me. I couldn't handle all of this. And on top of it, been alone. It destroyed parts of me and weakened others. I got many fears and they seemed like they would never end. I was burried in my own pain and I couldn't see that things could ever possibly get better.

You find your faith has been lost and shaken
You take back what's been taken
Get on your knees and dig down deep
You can do what you think is impossible
Keep on believing, don't give in
It'll come and make you whole again
It always will, it always does
Love is unstoppable

And just when it seemed like the world was against me, I went home to tiny little Delta, Colorado. That was where I saw your bright, shinning faces. You two were always something beyond ordinary. Something special. It was then I realized it. You stood out from the rest of the world, like a hand reaching out to support and help. That was you: Jack and Jerry. All too amazing, yet not perfect. But it always seemed to me like your faults were strengths. I admired you too. And you two taught me that anything is possible, when you don't give in. I started to look for you for strength, comfort, guidance. I found it all there with you. I learned how to deal, even though it hurt.

And just after I had started to learn that, I left again. I left you two in my beautiful Delta hometown for stupid Killeen, Texas. And I hated it. I hated being away. And being away blinded me again. It made me go back to the same pain that I had started to be in before.

Love, it wear the ring of stone
Bring you back to being born again
oh, it's a helping hand when you need it most
A lighthouse shining on the coast
That never goes dim

I started to go back to the way I had been. I started making stupider decision, hurting myself and my friends. It seemed to ease my own pain, but truly, it never kept it away. I didn't get why the pain wouldn't just stay away. Things were horrid, and I started looking for faith in all the wrong places. I didn't know how I expected to be able to pull through, I wasn't in the right place. I was just in another dark room with no hope.

When your heart is full of doubt
And you think that there's no way out

I couldn't see anything but doubt. It was all too painful to me. I couldn't cope, I couldn't fight. There wasn't any way out, at least none that I could see from it. Everything was being ruined, everything being taken away from me.

You find your faith has been lost and shaken
You take back what's been taken
Get on your knees and dig down deep
You can do what you think is impossible
Keep on believing, don't give in
It'll come and make you whole again
It always will, it always does
Love is unstoppable

Your message came back to me, during July 2008. That day would of had to had been the worst thing that had happened in years. And I guess that's really when the message decided to find it's way back to my mind. I shook it off, it didn't ever seem to help. The rest of the month that followed just seemed to be more trying, harder, worse, scarier. And it hurt every single day, I couldn't just find my way out of it. There had been some hope before the hardships, but now, it was too much. The things that had happened haunted me, they hurt me. And they still do. But I was starting to be able to deal with it. I was starting to get through the darkness once more.

Like a river keeps on rolling
Like the north wind blowing
Don't it feel good knowing
Yeah

And then you, my all too amazing Jack Hawkins was taken away from me quicker than a blink of an eye. You were an uncle to me, somebody who I thought would always be there. I could get the simple, three word sentence to fit in my head. It tore me apart. I didn't want to give a crap about what happened anymore. It was over then and there, on March 2, 2009.

But then, a simple song came out by Rascal Flatts. One that reminded me of a lesson that you and my granddad Jerry had tought me. And I realized I couldn't give up. I had you living inside me. I had a promise to people that I couldn't break. And I wasn't going to.

You find your faith has been lost and shaken
You take back what's been taken
Get on your knees and dig down deep
You can do what you think is impossible
Keep on believing, don't give in
It'll come and make you whole again
It always will, it always does
Love is unstoppable

So I'm going to remember the lesson you taught. And I am going to make it through the dark. Because that's what you would of wanted.

Love is unstobbale
So you made a lot of mistakes
Walked down the road a little sideways
Love, love is unstoppable