it's days like this, when restless tears like rain
f
a
l
l
in a rhythm that leaves you breatheless, and
sobbing harder despite yourself, despite the fact
that you have no idea why, why your eyes melt
and your heart bleeds and your chest explodes
with senseless then that you realize it exists.
it's more than just a force that ties you down, makes you fall,
keeps you trapped, and begging against your chains.
it's in memories, cracked bits of time that dip your soul
in melancholy dreams. its in the weight of silence that threatens
to bust your eardrums, and in blacklight romance.
you feel it in the music, as it restlessly moves, dances, buzzes
and swarms beneath your skin, and in the way you just gotta feel,
gotta twist yourself this way and that, and in how goosebumps
like mountains rise against pale skin, run along hairlines,
as your eyes slip closed, and you loose yourself again
while time marches on, a tiny ticktickticktick that reminds
us all that nothing lasts forever. it's in prayers,
in the way you find god in his eyes, in her words,
how they both bear little crucifixes, etched and beautifiul--
poised for the death of life, and the birth of hope all at the same time.
it's in the metaphors you speak, and the way you've never been
anything less than secretive, in how you've trapped yourself
here, how you'll never be free, never, because theres something
in suffering too brilliant to resist. it's pinprick stars, and ghost kisses,
and longing that lingers too long on your tongue, runs down your fingers
sticky sweet and cold, like a cherry popsicle in the hands of your baby brother.
it's in life. in every part of every person, in each breath and each smile,
it's inevitable, and beautiful, and more than just the urge to
f
r
e
e
f
a
l
l
eternally. it's gravity, and its making you a modern day desperada.
so chase those fences girl, go ahead, play those hearts like cards
but remember, the ace isn't always in your hands.

a.n-- inspired heavily by the john mayer song "gravity" and my intense mood lately. love it if you wish, hate it if you dont.