A man in what appears to be clown makeup comes up and addresses you, the readers, directly. “Hello,” he says, “I am the Memester. These are my two henchmen, Munky—” he points to one of two identical henchmen, who shouts, “Trukk not Munky!” The Memester continues, “er, that is, Trukk, and Munky,” pointing to the other one. “And this is…”

Axis Mundi

Cut to a normal high school in Massachusetts. “Geez, Paul, I can’t believe you got detention again.”

“Shut up, Taylor,” Paul replied, “What were you staying after for, anyway?”

“Extra help in math,” Taylor answered.

“It figures. You always were an idiot.” Paul opened the door of the school to head out to the bus, then turned around when he realized Taylor had stopped. “What are you…oh, right, you and your stupid chivalry.”

“Yeah, we don’t really need your help with doors,” the girl who Taylor had held the door for added. Seeing another girl coming, however, Taylor continued to hold the door, letting it close after she’d passed through. “Hey,” a boy said, “how come you hold the door for Sarah and Vanessa, but not for me?”

“Because, A.J., you don’t have these,” Vanessa dryly replied, motioning to her chest.

“How do you know my name?” Sarah asked.

“I know everyone at this school,” A.J. replied.

“We’re going to miss the bus if you don’t stop standing around, Taylor,” Paul interrupted, turning around. “Wait…where’s the bus?” He turned back around. “Where’s the school?” He looked all around. “Toto, I don’t think we’re in Boston anymore.”

“Who’s Toto?” Taylor asked, and Paul smacked him.

“I think…I think we’re in the Realms of Fiction!” A.J. cried.

“Don’t be stupid, A.J., the Realms of Fiction are…well, fictional,” Vanessa replied.

“Do you have a better explanation?” Vanessa didn’t reply. “Exactly.”

“So how do we get out of here?” Paul asked.

“Why would you want to?” A.J. replied.

“Ugh…I’m surrounded by idiots…”

A fist in the back of the head told him otherwise. “Want to rethink that?” Sarah demanded.

“Thank you. Saves me the trouble of doing it myself,” Vanessa said.

“I don’t know you. Until you prove otherwise, you’re an idiot to me,” Paul said.

“It’s delinquents like you that have this world in such a crappy state,” Sarah shot back.

“What world? We don’t even know where the heck we are!”

“Our world, not…wherever we are now.”

“The Realms of Fiction!” A.J. insisted.

Just then, a group of tires, unattached to anything else, rolled by. They were covered with those red “EXIT” signs you find in buildings. Paul sweatdropped. “I don’t think I even want to know what that was about.”

“It’s quite simple,” the clown-person from earlier replied. “‘Tires don exits.’ See, because they’re wearing ‘EXIT’ signs…”

“Who are you?” Taylor asked.

“I am the Memester, defender of memes! And these two behind me are Munky—” “Trukk not Munky!” “—and Trukk.”

“What’s a meme?” Taylor asked.

A.J. explained, “A meme is a catchy derivative of some aspect of pop culture, parodied and repeated to the point that its origins and original meaning become muddled.”

“If only you put that type of effort into your schoolwork,” Vanessa said, and A.J. grinned.

“Right you are,” the Memester said. “Now, I must be going.”

“Before you do, can you tell us where we are?” Taylor asked.

“Don’t you know? This! Is! SPARTA!!!”