Fuck. I know, I know. I said I wouldn't cuss (as much) anymore now that I'm a parent. Well, screw that. Jalen can't even read yet. It's 4am and my head hurts. And my neck. And my back. And my shoulders. And my feet. Did I mention I was also cranky? Cranky left over from last night when Jalen wasn't feeling well with a fever. In his toddler brilliance, he decided that if he was uncomfortable, then the rest of the house should also suffer and become miserable as well. There was a particularly heartwarming moment when he attempted to throw a wooden block at me because my explanation about why his favorite cartoon was not on a 3 in the morning was not satisfactory.

Now, of course, he's fine. Sleeping on his father's chest. They're both snoring but to be honest I can't determine if Jon or Jalen is snoring louder. At least Jon got to go to work to relieve his cranky. Then again he came up to set up Sydney's crib and grumbled the entire time. I considered helping him, but because Jon isn't the most happy go lucky guy, he takes cranky to another level. It's always better to leave him alone. It now bothers me that most items for children require adult assembly. We aren't the ones that want to play with it. Why do we have to hassle putting it together? I guess that's why Jalen's favorite toy is a lamp shade. We're not bad parents. I promise.

Not like I had time to help him anyway. The damn phone rang off the hook the entire day. I swear Kirk called at least 8 times. Kirk is ok as bosses go and I know he wasn't too happy about me having to go on maternity leave early, but hell, that made two of us. Who would have thought that having even one case would cause me enough stress to push up both mine and Sydney's blood pressure? Then again, Kirk is mainly pissed because I'm not around to make his sorry ass look good. He's got all of the charisma of a good lawyer, but none of the logic.

I guess I should just let Kirk pass. He did help me get the job being the legal consultant for LA DA while I'm on leave. Making sure some low rate television program has accurate legal jargon is probably one of the easiest jobs I've ever had. I'd planned to work outside today, but no, Oklahoma City decided that today would be a good day to be 45 and windy. It's May for crying out loud.

Did I mention I was cranky? I should try to get some sleep since I have my doctor's appointment first thing in the morning. And we all know how much I love those. I have no idea why this pregnancy is being such a bitch. All Sydney has to do is float around and grow. Yeah, superb maturity from the woman verging on 30. Jon suggested we go to the Grand Canyon for my birthday but at the thought of dealing with the heat, the other tourists, keeping up with Jalen, and walking around on swollen feet I (less than) politely declined.

I wish I could drink a tall glass of wine. Maybe I'll just put some grape juice in a wine glass. Hmm...