Act one – scene one

(Enter Rocco Moreti, the Italian bass player for the band "The Foreigners". He has his bass in his hand and the bass strap around his shoulder. He smiles and takes a bow).

Rocco – Ello, my name is a-Rocco Moreti. I am from Italy. Rome, Italy that is. I am the a-bass guitar player for our band "The Foreigners". I would like to remind you about a few things before the show starts. First of a-all, no flash photography or filming of the musical. Our guitarist is a little camera shy.

Gabriel – I am not camera shy! I'm just still getting used to the fame!

Rocco – That's a-Gabriel Davis, he's our guitarist from England.

Gabriel – I'm from Kent, England! You have to tell people what town or city you're from!

Rocco – I don't get why you would have to do that.

Gabriel – You're going to bloody make me come out there and explain it to you for the 1 thousandth time… Aren't you!

Rocco – Yes! Please do!

(Gabriel comes out, shaking his fist at Rocco).

Gabriel – Lets just put it this way. (Sighs). Where are you from?

Rocco – Italy.

Gabriel – Where in Italy?

Rocco – Italy, Italy!

Gabriel – No! What state, you twit!!

Rocco – Oh… Rome, Italy.

Gabriel – There.. You get it now. I'm from Kent, England. You're from Rome, Italy. Where is Eli from?

Rocco – A-Germany.

Gabriel – Where in Germany! What state!

Rocco – Berlin, Germany…

Gabriel – And where is Tom from

Rocco – Ireland.

Gabriel – WHERE!!

Rocco – A-Dublin, Ireland.

Gabriel – You get it now?

Rocco – No….

Gabriel – I'll try and explain it later, chap. I got to go see if my guitar is ready for the show. Try not to say that Tom is an alkie.

Rocco – That means that he likes to drink a lot! And I mean a lot. You know how the Irish are when it comes to a-drinking.

Gabriel (off stage) – You airhead!!

Rocco – Anyways. Second of all, I will a-politely ask for everyone in this theater to turn off all cell phones and beepers. Our German drummer Elliot Schulz gets very annoyed at times. He has sort of a mood problem. I think he's a-bipolar. And last but not least, no snacks or food allowed in the theater, or you will a-be escorted out of the theater with no a-refund. Now please… Sit back and a-enjoy the show!

Gabriel (peeking out from the curtains) – Come on! The show is about to start. The set crew is almost done with setting up the first scene.

Rocco – Ooo! Must a-go!

(Rocco runs offstage and trips over a wire, landing face flat on Gabriel's amp. Gabriel starts to laugh for a few seconds and then realizes that Rocco is hurt).

Gabriel – Oh my god, chap! Are you all right!

(Gabriel drags Rocco off the stage and the curtain opens)