For the following people- My RRA girls, My Cee, My Dean, My Katie, My Mitch, My Nia, and My Jake. Thank you for standing by me no matter what.

Be Still

I remember everything all too well that has happened since I met you. It just seemed like there wasn't an end to any of it, like it was going to drag on forever. And when things started to look better, they suddenly dropped and were worse again. It never seemed like they were good for anybody. We all felt like we were going to fall apart. And when I tried to help you, I was weighed down by my own trials. And it seemed like they were never ending and that I wasn't as good a friend that I could of been to you.

I was scared, lost, going through hell. I felt like I didn't know what to believe in anymore. Like there was no one in the world that I could trust. And that the minute I got more problems, people ran and left me alone. But when I really opened my eyes, there you were, still there at my side.

I remember all the times
the good times and the bad
I'm still holding on to you
some days I wanna run
and times I come undone
but I still belong to you
thats how I know that

When I felt like falling apart or breaking, all I had to do was send a text, give a call, or write an email, and you'd try to help me to the best of your abilities. You didn't always have advice, but you were there. Rain or shine, night or day. You always had to make sure that I was okay, that I wasn't going to break into tiny pieces. And I never understood why you even cared. Honestly, I really still don't understand it.

I never had felt like I had mattered, like I meant anything to anybody. People seemed to use me when they needed me, and then throw me away like a used tissue. It never felt good to have that happen. I was scared to trust, scared to tell anybody anything about me in fear that it would end up being used against me. But something was different when it came to you. That wasn't your intention. All you wanted was to help me through, not turn it into something you could end up using against me.

when I feel like caving in
my heart my soul is wearing thin
I just want to give up
nothing seems at all to add up
its then you whisper in my ear
be still and know I'm here

And the thing that surprised me the most was that you put me first. I knew you had things going on in your life as well, but that didn't stop you from making sure I was alright first. And if neither of us could cope, we ended up talking about it at the same time, holding each other and comforting, though I didn't expect that I was helping you much at all. It never felt like I was doing half as much for you as you were for me.

I never understood why you seemed to me to be so strong, even when you had things that were going on in your life. The world was cruel to all of us, either taking away everybody that we needed, or by making the people that had gone through things with us want to back out. But at the end of the day, we could look up and we still had each other. And that was all that ever mattered. We were never alone, even if there were ones who we expected to be there had left.

I see a side of you my friend
the same struggles that I have
my heart goes out to you
I know its hard to feel alone
and this world's so unforgiving
I've been feeling that way too
but I can tell you

Looking at what's been going on, nothing seemed to be equal. It didn't seem to make sense why we seemed to be beating and destroying our demons only for them to return or for new ones to arise. That still doesn't seem to make sense. But that didn't seem to matter. Not as long as we had each other's backs and kept on enduring and holding on to each other.

Whenever I felt like giving up, I could hear your voice tell me to carry on. And I did. Looking back now, it wasn't that hard to endure for you. Because I knew I had you no matter what, I knew that I could carry on, even if I didn't feel like I could at times.

when I feel like caving in
my heart my soul is wearing thin
I just want to give up
nothing seems at all to add up
its then you whisper in my ear
be still and know I'm here

Sometimes it felt like that we were all alone, facing our problems without anybody else by our sides. It was as if we were trying to battle an army of demons by ourselves. I know that is how it felt to me, so I can guess how it felt to you. But when the sky opened up a little bit, we could see light that showed us who was there fighting with us.

I know I saw you there even when I felt that I had nothing. When I felt as if my world was being torn away from me, you were holding onto me, making sure that if you went anywhere, I was going with you. You kept me up, kept me going. And I tried to help do that for you. We had and still have each other and that will make sure that the demons will never win. Demons cannot beat us because we are too strong together.

Is that you?
Is this me
It's sometimes hard to believe that
I am not alone

When we all needed something to believe in, we all got together, ready to fight. It wasn't just an outside force, but sometimes it was the doubt of ourselves that couldn't get us through. I remember you doubting yourself, and I remember me doubting me. But when we talked, those doubts disappeared and were replaced by feelings that could help us move along. And sometimes, it really wasn't all that easy. However, we pressed forward because giving up was never and would never be an option for us.

When we felt alone, all we had to do was look around.

I knew that you were always there for me, even when I couldn't speak or see you. And you knew that I was going to be there no matter what for you.

its not just you
and not just me
we all need to believe that
we are not alone.

And when I feel like my burden is too much, you take bits of it away and put it onto your shoulders. You don't let me stumble behind you. I remeber the countless times that you would whisper or say to me "I'm here." That was always enough to keep me going. Knowing that I was not alone and would never be alone because I had you at my side.

when I feel like caving in
my heart my soul is wearing thin
I just want to give up
nothing seems at all to add up
its then you whisper in my ear
be still and know I'm here

And I just wanted to say thanks for sticking with me and promising that you'll always be there for me. I also want to you to know that I am there for you, just as you have been there for me in the past.

be still and know I'm here