Piece of You

It doesn’t matter what I do or whatever I saw. All I can think about is you. I’m not sure if what I feel are regrets or something else. I’m not sure what to do or how to feel. I wish I could forget about you and all the pain you put me through.

Our time together was like nothing I had ever been through before. I loved you, but now I just want to move on. Your memory keeps me held down though. I can’t move forward nor can I move on. I can’t do anything because all I still think and dream about is you.

I lay here in the night and wonder if I ruined us. I post regrets of how I said okay. I hold so many regrets. I gave you everything and you took it all away and left. You left me with nothing in the end.

You promised me that you wouldn’t hurt me, that we would be together forever. I thought you meant forever, not just a short while until you decided you wanted to move on. I believed that you were serious. How could you betray me? I trusted you with everything.

Now I learn that I was just a fool who should have never agreed. You were nothing more then a liar. You did this all on purpose. You used me and I let you. If you had stayed what more pain would you have caused me? Would I even still be living or would my heart have died? Would I be broken and shattered by now because of you?

It doesn’t matter, you still hold me within your grasp and I don’t know how to escape. I’m not sure what to do in order to get away from you and your hold. I just want to move on, without you but your presence still lingers here around me, haunting me like a ghost of my past. Is that what you are now? A ghost that feels it must haunt me, taunt me.

I clenched my fists and my sides, tears rolling down my red tinted cheeks. This shouldn’t hurt this much. I should be glad that you’re gone, not be wondering when you’ll come and take me back. I want to move on and I’ve tried to but you haunt every corner of my mind every day. No matter who I see or whatever I try you’re always there watching me.

What do I have to do in order to move on? Answer me that if nothing else. Give me an answer so I can move on forward without you by my side. I want to find someone else, someone who cares and won’t hurt me like you did. I just want to find my freedom, the freedom I used to have and hold, the freedom to do what I want without having to worry about someone else floating around in the forefront of my mind, watching me, stalking me.

Just leave me be, let me go, I beg of you. Just set me free so that I may move on without you. I want to find happiness. I want real happiness with someone I won’t be hurt by. I want to be with someone who isn’t anything like you. So you have to let me go otherwise I’ll never be able to move on, continue on.

Why didn’t you take this presence of you with you when you left? Why did you leave this piece of yourself with me, within my heart and my mind? Why didn’t you take it with you? Did you want me to suffer with your memory? Why couldn’t you have just taken it all back when you left? Why would you have wanted me to suffer like this? I don’t understand your reasoning behind it all.

Did I do something to you that made you hate? If I did I’m sorry, but please just come and take your memories back from me. Leave me, my heart, mind, and spirit in peace. I beg of you to come and take back what you left so that I may move on, for real this time. Just set me free from his hold, from this cage you put me within. That’s all I’m asking of you.

Then we both can move on. We can forget each other and never see one another again. We won’t have to remember each other. Everything will change and we’ll be just fine. We can both find happiness, but you have to let me go! That’s all I ask.