I Should Hate You

I should hate you,

as much as you hate me I suppose.

It’s not really something I would’ve chose.

You were my friend,

the one I thought I could count on…

until the end.

I guess it’s too much to ask for,

to go back to how it was before.

As if it could ever happen.

So I thought about speaking to you,

my deletion and banned status proved that it was through.

Not to apologize, never;

not my fault you took it how you did,

the whole stupidity of that situation makes me laugh;

I guess now we’re each on a different path.

It’s probably for the better ya’know?

So one night I prayed.

Yes, I actually prayed.

Maybe asking if what I did was okay,

that if we were meant to be friends I would get a sign or a spoken word.

Guess what?

I never heard.

I guess that was my answer.

You go on doing what you want,

I will not be around to hear anything.

It was the inevitable,

was I the only one noticing that our conversations were tense?

If so, then you must really be dense.

Yeah, I lost a close friend,

our friendship could never be ‘on the mend.’

Sad thing is that right now,

I feel nothing.

Not a sense of remorse or happiness or sadness,

not one thing.

Yeah, I know you hate me.

Yeah, I know it’s true.

Yeah, I know that there’s nothing I can do.

Keep on hating me,

Personally, I really don’t care;

I’ll stare right back into that hate filled glare.

One thing confuses me though…

How is it that even after all of that I can’t hate you?

I’ve thought of a million possible answers but not one satisfies me so here’s what I say in return to everything…

I should hate you.