CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

Charlotte slept until past noon the next day. It was much needed rest. After she awoke, her grandmother made her lunch and the two of them talked for a long time. Charlotte was glad to be able to have a real conversation with her grandmother. For once she felt that she didn’t have to be fake with her.

At around four, the doorbell rang. Charlotte’s grandparents had left to get some groceries. They were running low on food and they had all come to an agreement earlier that Charlotte would be staying with them until further notice. So Charlotte went to the door and answered it.

Charlotte was not expecting to find someone coming to her grandparent’s house to see her, but it was Jake at the door. She wondered how he had even found the place, so she asked. “How did you know where I was?”

“I went to your house and your mom was there. She told me you were here and told me how to get here.”

Charlotte’s grandparents must have called her mother at some point, probably just to let her know that Charlotte was safe.

“You weren’t at school today,” Jake said.

“Good observation.”

“Can we talk?”

Charlotte sighed and then moved aside to let Jake into the house. She closed the door and led him to the living room. They both sat on the couch, turned towards each other.

“What happened to your hand?” Jake asked, pointing to the Charlotte’s bandages.

Charlotte thought of a lie quickly. “I cut myself…while cooking.”

Jake looked at her skeptically. “You don’t cook.”

“Hence why I cut myself.”

“You’re lying. What really happened?”

Charlotte wished that Jake didn’t know her so well. “Its nothing that you need to worry about,” she said, trying to dismiss the subject.

“Anything that has to do with you getting hurt is something that I need to worry about.”

Charlotte stopped herself from laughing out loud. “You didn’t seem to worry about it too much yesterday.”

Jake sighed, dropping his head. He was obviously frustrated and stressed. “I didn’t mean to make you think that I didn’t care what happened to you. Of course I do. Just look at it from my point of view for a second. What you were saying seemed really far-fetched. And then consider the source. Haruna isn’t necessarily your number one fan. She had you beaten up.”

“She wasn’t lying. Haruna and I are on good terms now. She was actually looking out for me. And everything she said fit perfectly with what happened that night.”

“Okay, well, just remember that I’ve known Bridget for a long time, and she’s my friend. So it’s hard for me to believe that she would do something like that. That doesn’t mean that I’m trying to choose sides or that I don’t care about you. I’m just…confused. That’s all.”

“You shouldn’t be confused. You should believe me. I know you weren’t trying to choose sides, Jake. The problem is that you should have. You should have been on my side. I have put up with Bridget’s shit long enough and you just keep defending her. How much is she going to have to put me through before you take her off that pedestal you seem to have her on?”

“I don’t have her on a pedestal. I just…I think better of her, I guess, than most people do.”

Charlotte didn’t understand. “She cheated on you, Jake. How can you still think so good of her?”

“She’s been through a lot,” said Jake. “She keeps it all to herself. People don’t realize.”

Charlotte could see that Jake was honestly concerned about Bridget. And suddenly something became clear to her. “Bridget’s a bitch, Jake. She’s manipulating you. Its time for you to come to terms with that. She’s not the wonderful person you think she is.”

“Charlotte, I don’t want you thinking that I have any feelings left for Bridget.”

Charlotte shook her head. “I don’t. I don’t think that.”

Jake seemed surprised. He obviously expected that this was the main focus of the argument. “You don’t? Then why does my relationship with her bother you so much?”

“It doesn’t. Not anymore. I get it now.”

“Get what?”

“This, the situation, everything. I get it.”

Jake looked confused. “Well, can you explain it to me, then? Because I have no clue what you’re talking about.”

Charlotte stood up and started pacing about the room as she spoke. It helped her gather her thoughts. “You’re a bit naïve, its true. But mostly, you’re just a really good guy. You need to come to the defense of anyone who is getting mistreated. It all makes sense now.”

“I’m still not following.”

“I always wondered why you were so quick to change your mind about me. It was so weird. It was like one minute you hated me, and the next you were being nice to me. And you said it was because I yelled at you, but you know what I think? I think that it was because I told you that people were bullying me. Then you came to my defense. And when Bridget was badmouthing me at the party, you told her the exact same words you said to me yesterday. You told her that you had had enough, and to stop what she was doing. So when I attacked Bridget yesterday, you naturally saw her as the victim, and so you jumped to her defense, even though that meant that you had to go against me. You just have to help the helpless, Jake. You need something to fix, something to protect.”

Jake waited to speak for a few moments, trying to understand all that Charlotte had said. Then he shook his head. “Charlotte, I’m not with you because I want to fix you.”

“Yes, you are. I’m your project.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“No, its not! It makes perfect sense. I’ve just replaced Bridget. That’s all. I know now that you weren’t trying to take Bridget’s side. Its not that you’re still in love with Bridget. Its just Bridget was playing the innocent victim, and you obviously bought it. So you didn’t trust me. You didn’t believe me. Because in the end, you just needed someone to protect. The problem is, Jake, I don’t need protecting. I don’t need to be fixed.”

Jake stood up, confused and frustrated and unable to stay seated any longer. “You’ve just think you’ve got this all figured out? You’ve got me figured out? You have no idea!”

“You’re just pissed because I’m right.”

“You’re not even close to being right. Look, Charlotte, I’m sorry if my reaction to you attacking Bridget hurt you in anyway, but that’s all it was. A reaction, a moment. It’s not worth all this prodding and digging to create some deeper meaning.”

“It doesn’t matter anyway!” Charlotte threw up her hands and fell down onto the couch. “Either way, I’m done.” She leaned back and put her hands to her face with a sigh.

“You’re done?”

Charlotte stood up again. “Yes. I’m tired, Jake. I’m tired of fighting about this. I’m tired of trying to explain shit. I’m tired of having to try so fucking hard to make this work. Its obviously not working!”

“What are you saying?” Jake said, unconsciously taking a step back, away from Charlotte.

“I’m saying, I’m done. I’m tired of it.”

“Tired of us?”

“I’m tired of everything. Tired of us. Tired of you. I just want it to be done now.”

Jake didn’t say anything for a minute. They stood there in a tense, awkward, silence. Finally, Jake spoke. His voice was quiet and defeated, which was unlike him. “Fine then. It’s done.” He turned away slowly and walked out of the room. Charlotte heard him slam it shut and knew he was gone. She fell back down on the couch. She thought she would feel relieved. She didn’t have to deal with any of it anymore. This was what she wanted. But she wasn’t relieved. A tense knot had formed in her chest and no matter how deeply she breathed or how much she tried to think of other things, it wouldn’t go away.