freedom and fear is less than
two weeks away

I feel like I should be
saying my goodbyes

the truth is I am
glad I missed your birthday

seeing you again
would only be another lie

I will avoid our farewell
and never have to speak to you

I will only look back
and think of you with regret

I should have just said it outright
releasing those silent words between us

even though it never would have
made a difference

… I want to kiss you
until you can’t see straight…

I can’t help but think
you would have only laughed.