Call Me Confused

Chapter One:

Damien stared out the moving van's windows, watching the landscapes pass him by. Only a few short days ago, his alcoholic father had told him to pack four boxes worth of his stuff and that they were moving again. This was their life; his father would usually get a job, keep it for six months, then show up on his job site drunk as a skunk and end up brawling with some guy. And then it always ended with his father getting fired and they quickly left town afterwards so that way his father couldn't be sued.

His father's car drifted to the other side of the road before quickly swerving back into his own lane. “I'll drive dad,” he said, sitting up more and watching his father's reaction. Nothing.

“Dad, I'll drive.” he said again, this time with more force to get his father's attention.

“Fuck off,” was his dad's only reply before drifting back over the yellow center line.

“You're going to fucking kill us if you don't stop!” Damien ground out, reaching to grab the wheel from his dad's hands and get the car back on their own side. His father yanked the wheel back before slamming his knuckles down on Damien's.

“I said no!” his father roared, this time narrowly missing the oncoming car that blared its horn at them. “Goddamn boy! I said stop!”

“No! You're drunk again now give me the damn wheel!” Damien ground out again, licking his lips and expecting a screaming match with him. His father got back in their lane and Damien sat back, trying to relax, but something in the back of his mind said otherwise.

“Where are we?” he asked, trying to reconcile with his dad for the moment. A grunt then a click of the GPS system stated in a monotone voice.

“Huh, guess we're in a place called Lexington.” his dad said, reaching up with his right hand to scratch his head.

'Well, this is normal. He gets us lost as usual.' Damien thought as he stared out the window. Houses crowded both sides of the road as they drove in, bright green lawns the only witnesses.

“This is..The place where the... Battle of Lexington.. Happened.” his dad said around the bottle he had pressed to his lips; from the smell of it it had to be vodka and orange juice. Damien rolled his eyes, not interested in that useless piece of information.

“I'm starving. Where are we going to eat?” he asked, knowing the next answer all too well.

“God, boy, I ain't got money for food so shut up.” his dad slammed the bottle down and glared at him out of the corner of his blood shot eyes. Damien slunk back into the plush seats and his stomach gave a noisy reply.

“We're always moving. And you can't keep a damn job! No wonder why we have no money and mom left you!” Damien muttered under his breath, crossing his arms over his chest. His dad pulled into a gas station, ignoring him completely. Grabbing the few dollars that was left, he walked inside, stumbling sideways.

A few minutes later his dad came back outside with a 30-pack of beer and chuckled getting inside of the van.

“Ah, this'll hit the spot!” he said happily, putting the box behind his seat. Damien shook his head and reclined his seat.

“Well, when you get us to our right place, wake me up.” he mumbled, closing his eyes. His father grunted before turning on the radio to fill the never ending silence. That was one thing Damien liked; the silence.

oOoOoOo

It was dark when his father had pulled into a cheap little motel. Damien opened his eyes, groggy from the countless hours in the vehicle and sat up.

“We ain't staying boy. I'm picking up something.” his dad said, motioning for him to stay put before getting out of the car and walking up a flight of stairs. Damien snorted and reclined back. It was always the same; his dad would always come to a cheap motel then come back with five or six baggies full of stuff that kept him gone for a few days. He closed his eyes and stuck his earphones deep in his tender ears. At least in his dreams he could escape the real world.

The car door slammed shut and the car started up and pulled away. He knew the routine as he could smell the intoxicating smoke that make him want to hurl and inhale at the same time. He gave a choking breath before coughing and lowering the window halfway.

The car jolted over a speed bump, sending Damien straight up in the seat. Suddenly his mind was reeling and he had a bad feeling deep in the pit of his stomach.

“Dad, stop!” He screamed, seeing the large truck racing towards them. For a moment he thought his dad would be able to speed out of the truck's path but he thought wrong. The truck slammed into the van, sending them sideways, and glass flew everywhere.

Time slowed down; the van rolled two, three time before coming to a stop in the other lane, glass littering the ground with its pebble sharpness and shards of splintered colored glass from tail lights and head lights were scattered on the floorboards inside. Damien struggled against the seatbelt that was choking him slowly. Flailing around, he couldn't find any purchase to move or undo the clip.

“Help!” he screamed, finding his voice and air. He waved his arms around again, this time his fingers scraped the top of his head and came back bloody. His eyes widened and he screamed again, feeling himself choking even more.

“Help!” he cried again, this time tears running down his face. For a moment, he thought back to six years ago, the day his mother was leaving him and his father.

' “Mommy! Take me with you!” little Damien cried, clinging to his mother's seemingly never ending leg. She shook her head and pealed him from her leg before patting the top of his head.

“I'm leaving you John. You're always drunk and I can't keep doing this!” his mother told his father who was sitting in his Lazy boy chair. His father barely glanced his mother's way. “Did you hear me?” she said, hands on her hips.

“Yeah, yeah. I heard you. You won't last out there with you and him. You'll come crawling back to me.” his father chuckled, taking another swig of his cheap beer.

“I'm not taking Dam, I'm leaving him with you.” his mother said, turning her back on them, gathering her suitcases. Damien watched his father sit up in the chair but he couldn't move anywhere.

“What do you mean 'you're not taking him'?” his father growled, crushing the tin can with his bare hands.

“You heard me. I'm going to be living with Terrence; he's my boyfriend now. And Terrence doesn't want a little seven year old running around the house.” his mother's careless reply struck him hard. Damien tried to hold back the tears that suddenly flooded his eyes.

“I'm staying...” he said quietly, watching as his mother walked out of the door and his father stood up and announced they were going to be moving again.

“Hey! Kid! Can you hear me?” a voice shouted next to Damien's ear, but he couldn't respond as he gazed blankly up at the uniformed man. “Hurry, he's gonna die!” the paramedic shouted, and the ambulance doors slammed, the sound echoing in Damien's fractured mind.