A/N: Someone should ban useless author’s notes.

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Day 2 (morning):

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I attempted to steal away from my hotel room in the wee ungodly hours of the morning, craving a moment alone. Sadly, the stalker twins were sharing a room down the way, and with their sonar ears specifically turned into Casper-detection devices, they pounced upon the sound of my opening door like lionesses to a sickly gazelle.

I slammed it back shut again. Obviously, seven in the morning was not too early for some lovesick predators who were on the patrol. I had already been spotted, and there was little time for escape before they came knocking at my door.

I bolted to the connecting door to the room beside me, not caring who was in it, as long as they were able to help.

“Cazzie!” I heard the fat one, Vicky, croon. I nearly whimpered as I pounded on the side door, and was surprised to see Adam, in only a shirt and boxers, open up to me. He didn’t even have a chance to speak before I had shoved the newbie aside and entered his domain in search of Delancey.

“She’s not here,” Adam said quickly, bewilderment in his voice probably in reaction to my fearful rampage.

“Dude,” I said, grabbing at the collar of his shirt. “Ya gotta help me! The twins, they want to eat me!”

“Eat you?” Adam repeated in surprise.

“Nevermind, idiot…” I huffed, shoving him away. “You’re useless.”

I started searching for a window, a vent, something to hide under perhaps… But soon decided it best to just make a break for it and take my chances. Surely ‘dunlap’ Vicky would lose her breath within five hundred feet, but I was more worried about skin-and-bones-Mona.

I put a hand on the doorknob and took one last disgusted look at Adam Ferguson, who had been no help to me at all, and still stood like a codfish with his mouth hanging open.

“What a jackass,” I couldn’t help but mutter.

He snickered very audibly.

“You’re just mad ‘cuz I’m screwing your ex-girlfriend. Get over it, dude.”

I took my hand off the doorknob.

As I paused, feral instincts began to take over. To the women reading this, you will never understand what it means to have your manhood questioned. It is the nature of a male to defend himself and his possessions. When one is challenged, the Neanderthal core emerges, and one must rise to the occasion. Especially against a sissy little dork like Adam.

“Say that again?” I dared.

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Day 2 (evening)

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“I can’t believe you!” My very upset sister hit me for the hundred-trillianth time. I sat with a broad, smug, very victorious grin, and an ice pack to my jaw. I sat in a chair in the hotel infirmary across from a disgruntled redheaded raccoon.

That’s right baby-- a right hook and then a left made Adam a black-eyed boy! I smiled a bit wider at him. If he hadn’t been such a whiner about that busted honker of a nose, then I wouldn’t even have to be here.

“You’ve ruined my wedding pictures!” Kat cried, hitting me again. “How could you be so selfish?!”

“And stupid,” Delancey added from the corner of the room.

My smile only faded when I caught sight of Delancey’s laser glare burning me where I sat. She just shook her head at me and leaned to tend to her boyfriend.

“Are you okay, honey?” she cooed at him, dabbing that profusely bleeding nose ever-so-tenderly… just like she did when we were in high school after I lost a football game and she played nurse on me. Good times.

Just the thought that she was taking care of someone else made me scowl and sick to my stomach to watch. I had to turn my head.

“I’m going to see if the nurse has some more gauze pads-- this one’s a gusher,” Delancey informed Adam as she stood up. She shot me another death glare. “He could press charges, you know, Caz.”

I shrugged carelessly.

“It’s my word against his,” I countered.

As Delancey hurried out the door, Kat hit me again.

“Three days before my Big Day, Casper!” she bawled some more. “You never think about me!”

“Kat, get a grip!” I shot out, pulling the ‘big brother’ card on her. “You’ll look great still, even better compared to Peter Pan here, in fact. And I’m pretty as ever, so…”

“How’s that jaw there, Reed?” Adam cracked. “Still got all your teeth?”

Ooo, he was a feisty one. Too bad he punched like a girl.

“Shut up, geekwad, before I decide to take your lunch money too.”

“And here I thought you were supposed to be a friendly ghost…”

That comment made me jump to my feet.

“You really like getting your ass kicked, don’t you?”

“Why, God, WHY?!” Kat pleaded with the ceiling.

Delancey stormed in like a super-rhino to save the day, shooting her pointer finger at each of us.

“Casper, sit down and shut up. Adam, stop baiting the Neanderthal. And Kat, your cake will be finished, your dress will arrive on time, we’ll put make-up on Adam and everything will be perfect, I promise.”

Kat looked up at her best friend with moist eyes.

“Promise?”

“I’m not wearing make-up,” Adam protested, and Delancey promptly shushed him.

After the chaos had died, Delancey promptly pulled me aside to talk. She hauled me off by the bicep as my sister cheered her on, and Adam seemed a bit peeved. I was just giggling inwardly at the whole ordeal, tickled that I had caused the imposter some pain.

“What is the matter with you?” Delancey demanded, hitting me on the arm (in no weak manner either) so that I would feel her wrath. “I’m dating someone else. Get over it!”

I drew back in surprise at her bluntness. It stung.

“Why should I?” I shot back like the child I am.

“It’s your sister’s big day and we should be focusing on her, but you’re way too busy being immature about this to realize that maybe, for once, this isn’t about you.”

I directed my eyes elsewhere and crinkled my brow, and I could tell she felt guilty about her harsh words because I spotted her biting her lip in regret.

“Look, I’m sorry,” she backtracked, trying to find my gaze again. “I’m sorry nothing became of us; that we didn’t work out. I really am. But it happens. And I have Adam now, and he’s pretty cool… and…”

She stopped herself because she knew how pathetic that sounded. It overcame her with grief, and tears came next.

“I’m hurt too, Dee, you know?” I said gently, twirling my index finger around a stray lock of her hair. "My mind is on the Delancey channel, all the time. I just want another chance at us. I can get down and beg if you want, but you know I have sensitive kneecaps.”

Delancey shook her head, as more tears came to her eyes. That’s when Katrina got tired of waiting, and called for her best friend. Delancey wiped her eyes, sniffed, and tried to appear normal.

“Delancey! Are you guys almost done?”

My sister is so clueless at times. I really felt like running her face under the nearest water faucet like I used to when we were little.

“Come on!” she called some more. “We need to go pick up the cake! Casper, can you drive us? I hate that rental car.”

“Aw, give Delancey and me a minute,” I waved her off. “Make Randy do it.”

“Randy doesn’t want to leave the poolside,” Katrina replied with some disappointment. Seemed to be the norm when it came to the subject of Randy. “He isn’t interested in this stuff anyway.”

At her hurt little voice, something burned inside me again, so much that I was distracted from my talk with Delancey. I growled low in the back of my throat, hating this douchebag tool of a boy that wasn’t acting right, and thus causing my baby sister pain.

“What, he isn’t interested in getting married?” I shot back, a retort that made me want to pat myself on the back. “No, no. That’s not gonna fly. I’m going to go fetch him. Don’t move.”

I think Delancey was glad for the reason to get me out of her face, and coaxed Katrina into letting me go. Me leaving made Adam happy too, even with an icepack over his bruised eye.

I jogged through the hotel lobby and poker tables to the hotel pools, and Randy wasn’t hard to find. He was the one in the bright gold banana-hammock, slurping mimosas and flirting with the pool hotties.

I grumbled to myself as I slowed my jog to a brisk walk, and went to retrieve him.

“Hey, Casper, my man!” Randy greeted me. “Pull up a lounge chair, grab an alcoholic bev.”

I hated when he talked like an air-headed surfer boy. He wasn’t even at a quarter of his life expectancy and he was balding, and hadn’t touched a surfboard in his life.

“No, I’m not going to ‘grab a bev’,” I replied. “My sister needs you. The cake’s finally ready.”

Randy rolled his eyes.

“Tell her you couldn’t find me.”

I folded my arms, utterly disgusted and gave him a look to inform him of my heightened displeasure. I couldn’t believe him. The more he tried to explain, the more I hated him. I wanted to punch his lights out, but he was quite larger than me, with training, and I’m not stupid.

“Look, man,” Randy tried to explain. “Weddings are like, stressful, you know. I need to have my head right and stuff. Now, have a seat with me-- the view is mmm! Scrumptious, dude. I don’t know what they feed their chickies here but their knockers are the size of-- Oh, hey, baby cakes!” he called to a waitress in a bikini. “Another one, por favor!”

Suddenly, I saw Peter’s giant self come out of nowhere, grab the lounge chair with Randy on it.

“No ‘POR FAVOR’!” Peter yelled angrily, and he threw Randy, lounge chair and all, into the pool. Everyone gasped, and Peter just laughed and waved so they would calm down. But when Randy surfaced again, Peter went back into battle mode. Even I had to take a step back.

“What the hell, man?!” Randy spat out.

“Katrina is crying!” Peter announced. I hadn’t known that, since she wasn’t crying when I left. Peter must’ve found her in the front of the hotel, and when he saw tears coming from his love, decided someone’s head had to roll.

“You asked her to marry you, so start acting like you want to.” Peter leaned close to whisper: “Or I will make you bleed, ingrate.”

I just let the man work, as Peter took off his own pants to give to Randy to wear, and demanded the shirt off my back, which I quickly handed over, no questions asked. Peter was usually a gentle giant, so when he got cross, he was really cross, and it was time to listen.

When we got back, strangers seemed confused as to why I was shirtless and Peter was pantless, but our group got the picture quickly when we a dragged a poor, humble Randy up and delivered him to his now happy bride.

“Dude, that was so sick,” I hissed at Peter. “You went all Hulk on his butt! ‘No por favor’-- that was priceless.”

“Drop it, Casper,” Peter snapped, and I quickly recoiled. After a moment of watching a wet Randy walk off with tiny little Katrina, and Peter’s longing eyes staring after them, I understood. I patted Pete on the back commiseratively. I felt his pain, as I in turn watched Adam put an arm around Delancey, winking back at me with his one good eye just to rub it in. It was now official. I hated those guys.

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Please review.
Signed,
--RedRogue55