|A Feast Of Fleming
Author: gcpdguy PM
An ode to James Bond!Rated: Fiction M - English - Parody/Adventure - Words: 251 - Published: 10-19-09 - Status: Complete - id: 2732745
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A Feast Of Fleming
Into the office, I strolled over to M
He said, "Turn on the tellie. It's time to watch them!"
To what he was referring, I knew I'd be in heaven
It was 15 Days of 007!
I killed Blofeld again, I caught Dr. No's carp
And I know I heard Auric "playing his golden 'arp!"
Then Pussy and I, we rolled in the hay
Tomorrow never died, so we slept through today
On an isle, I met a man with a bright golden gun
Then I sought out a tattooed lass for more fun
She had on her an octopus right near her rump
As an agent, I need info, so her I did pump
I carved Paris with my tool in a similar fashion
No Walther PPK, just my hot satisfaction
She was not my Majesty, but I was in her service
At least until the CCCP sub resurfaced
Like a thunderball, I went to Russia with love
I lived and let die, the world wasn't enough
I went skiing and skiing and skiing some more
But I'm far too dapper to visit a whore
So I went back to Britain for my birthday cake
Ms. Moneypenny baked it; I had some, for her sake
Before my adieu to her and to Q
(Who fixed my fine watch) this quote to me dawned:
"You only live twice is the popular view
Good day to you all. I'm Bond...James Bond."