Forever

By A. Tanner

He looked into Her window. A light was shining through, though the thick curtains prevented him for seeing anything. He would hear music play, listen to Her sing along until the night slowly turned into dawn. He knew Her so well. He knew Her favorite songs to sing, how She was always listening to some kind of music. He had watched for so long now. He knew all of Her body movements. How She fluttered Her hands around when She was happy, and how when She was mad, She would pinch Her nose, or rub Her forehead. He knew Her name, Her favorite color, almost everything about Her. But she did not know him. Probably did not even remember his name. They had only talked once or twice, and even then, She looked right through him, as if he did not even exist. But he knew at that moment, he was in love. He had to try to convince Her, even though he knew it would not likely happen. But he had to try. And so he would wait, and just be content with watching Her, listening to Her. His desire, no, obsession with Her growing only stronger over time. He knew that She was his, and he would prove it to Her.

She did not know he watched Her every night. She did not seem to care. She kept Her head high, and ignored His presence. But he knew She felt him watching Her, desiring Her. He saw all of the nervous looks, glances at windows, making sure no faces were peering back at Her. He took his friends there one night, to show them how beautiful She was. She was like a gazelle, only She was his gazelle and he was a tiger, ready to strike, and claim Her as his own. His friends, his buddies, had convinced him to make his presence known to Her. And he had. But all he did was startle away his gazelle. She sprinted deeper into the house, careful to remain away from windows, to not go out at night. He was furious. But still, he waited and watched his little gazelle hoping to catch a glimpse of Her, here and there.

He saw Her vividly one night. At first, She was playing a little game outside late one night, and he knew it was his perfect opportunity to study Her, watched Her, touch Her, speak to Her. But, he held back, for he did not want to frighten away his gazelle again. So he just watched. He watched them play their little game, watched them go back inside, to do things unbeknownst to him. And then, he saw his chance. Somewhere between Her being outside, to Her watching movies with Her friend, it was slipping into the early morning. And he listened to them talk. They talked about boys. All the boys She had been with. All the ones that had held Her. That had held his gazelle. So he knocked. He only knocked to destroy the conversation, make them forget about those stupid, little boys. And, just as he had expected, they fluttered out of the room like frightened birds. His frightened bird. He thought that he had heard the last of those insufferable boys, but he was wrong. He had made it worse.

That stupid boy called his woman. And he had to listen to them talk, to her flirt shamelessly with that mongrel. He was so angry. He could not believe that She would flirt with him. How She could let any other man hear her beautiful voice angered him. But still, he staid. And he watched Her until morning came.

The next night, he knew what he had to do. He took his buddies with him. He was only going to talk to Her, make Her see the error of Her ways. But She was a spirited girl, strong-minded. She wouldn’t listen, or talk peacefully to him. So, he brought his friends to help hold Her while they talked. But, he wasn’t expecting Her to realize something was up, to feel a new to be protected, to arm Herself. He knew he would never hurt Her, but She did not know that. She though He wanted to harm Her! What a ludicrous thought! Why would he ever harm his love? The reason he’s alive? It just didn’t make sense to him.

She had heard Her stupid, idiotic dogs barking, and was prepared. She came running outside with a small pistol in her hand. At first, he thought that she was coming to greet him, that at last, She loved him! So he kept walking forward, failing to notice his friends stepping back, about to run away. His joy was so immense!

Then he saw it. He was a pistol in Her hand, aimed right at his head. She meant to kill him. Immediately, his joy was gone. Joy replaced fear. He then became angry, furious, and depressed. How could She not love him? How could She dare wish him harm? All he had done was love Her, watch Her, cherish her the way other men couldn’t. And yet, She still refused him. Her stance spoke anger, as if She was also angry at him. Angry at him for even attempting to own Her. He knew that She was a free spirit, but he also knew that all birds could be caged, and that great spirit of Hers, broken.

He knew why She didn’t love him. He knew why She thought he would hurt Her. He knew why She was pointing a gun at his head. She couldn’t look past his slightly sordid past, that She couldn’t see the man he now was. She refused to see it. All She saw, all anyone ever saw, was the mistakes he had made. It was as if those alone made him, well, unlovable. He was so angry at Her. For the first time, he saw Her for who She was. But he wouldn’t believe it. It was all a mistake. He knew that She would love him. Surely, She could look past his mistakes. He said that he was sure of it, but he did not feel very sure.

He made a plan. Immediately, he knew what he had to do. He would take Her. Make Her love him. No matter what, She would be his. He knew it. There was no way escaping fate. He would just have to bide his time. Be content with watching Her. He would wait till she felt safe again. Safe enough to venture outside alone, by Herself, Her glorious self. He would wait for Her, stalk Her, until he made his move. And then, he would talk to Her. He would finally be able to make Her his, once and for all. He knew they were perfect for each other. That She would fit to him perfectly. There was no other way around it. She just had to be shown what he saw.

And so, he would wait, no matter how long it took. He would wait forever just to make Her his. He would watch Her every night, waiting for Her to put Her guard down. He knew that soon, one day very soon, She would be in his arms. She would be his, forever.