It wasn’t until later that night when tragedy struck. We received a phone call from his mom. She was crying.

“H-Harper…m-met a r-road…a-ac-accident.” She choked out between sobs. “W-we’re h-here at the…G-General Hospital…”

I didn’t wait anymore. I ran there, trying to swallow my tears. If only I stopped him. If only I didn’t let go of him. Oh, God, if only…

I arrived at the hospital, panting. I saw her mother on the third floor, anxious and crying.

“My son!” She suddenly cried as she saw me. She was shaking hard and I just hugged her.

“It’ll be all right.” I said soothingly. “He’ll be safe.”

I tried to control my shaking voice. I tried hard not to look at the boy inside the ICU. I tried my best not to see his bloody hooded jacked hanging on the wall…I tried, but I failed.

His mom cried herself to sleep on the waiting room, and I just let her. She was still mumbling and so I gently caressed her hair, saying that everything will be fine over and over again. I just recalled the talk we had when she settled down.

“His eyes were the ones that were injured the most…” She said in a cracking voice. “He might survive but he’ll be blind forever. He won’t be able to pursue his dream anymore…and that’s what I can’t bear the most, Zia. To see Harper live everyday with a broken heart and dream. He’s still young and yet…”

She trailed off as she broke down into tears again.

I was dragged back to reality with the pain of it all. Harper loves modeling. And it won’t be successful without his eyes. With that idea in my mind, I went home.

I couldn’t tell Harper that I love him anymore. I couldn’t be a writer anymore. I won’t be anything anymore…and I don’t care.

~*

My hands trembled as I arrived at the last page of Zia’s journal with a donor’s paper attached to it. Tears began to form in my eyes.

“It’s a good thing that your eyes didn’t reject the cornea.” The doctor said, a month after the operation. He went to our house for my check-up.

“Yeah.” I replied sadly. “It would’ve been a loss if it did.”

“After this, Harper, where will you go?” he asked.

“The cemetery.” I answered. “I’ll visit someone.”

“Who?”

“My girlfriend.” I replied. “She…was the one who donated her eyes for me.”

And so, after the check-up, I went to the cemetery and offered her a bouquet of red roses, her favorite.

“I’m here, Zia.” I said, smiling a little. “I’ll do my best for you because you deserve it.”

I always thought that if ever I reached my dream, she’ll be with me. I thought I loved her more than she does but I guess I was wrong. She ended up ending her own life just to give me her eyes that were the same as mine…to give me another life to start with.

And I loved her more because of that.